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What does Popeye do to keep his favorite tool from rusting?

He sticks it in Olive Oyl...

How is Popeye like canned artichokes?

They both come in Olive Oil!

Popeye

What do Popeye's fingers smell like ?

Olive Oyl

Why did Popeye beat up the Pope?

He heard he was going to Mount Olive

They named a chicken joint “Popeye’s...”

...because they stick it in Olive Oil.

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Why did Popeye never get laid?

Because Olive Oil was extra virgin.

Did you know that Popeye the Sailor Man doesn't seem strong to the Swedes and the Norwegians?

He is, however, strong to the Finnish.

How does Popeye like his martini prepared?

One Olive on the rocks.

I go to Popeyes' to get the kids something to eat.

Maddie wanted the kids meal with a leg.

So I said “kids meal with the leg”

And the lady says “which side?”


Me- \*complete silence as I heavily contemplate such an odd decision


“I guess the right side, hell I don’t know what the difference is.”


Af...

What part of Popeye never rusts?

The part that he sticks in Olive Oyl.

Why does Popeye's tool never rust?

Because he keeps it in Olive Oil.

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I thought Popeye was my dad

Because he's always chugging something from a can and beating up whoever my mom is .

Popeye is seen as iconic in America, but how is he viewed in Finland?

Oh, he's strong to the Finnish...

What part of Popeye has the smoothest skin?

The part he dips in Olive Oyl.

What part of Popeye never gets rusty?

The part he sticks in Olive Oyl!

<Popeye laugh>

If Popeye liked escargot instead of spinach

Would he be known as Popeye the Snailorman?

What was Popeye's last name?

Pimento, because he comes in an Olive.

Did you hear about Popeye's epiphany?

He had a religious experience on the way to mount Olive.

What would you call Popeye The sailor man if he was a camera man?

Popeye DSLR Man

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I was on shift at Popeye's when a woman approached my cash register and whispered in a very raspy voice,"I want you to choke me."

I was locked in her lustful gaze and I replied...

"biscuits with no drink then?"

Popeye was a really good photographer, Because he was

“Popeye DSLR man!”

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What happened when Napoleon went to Mount Olive?

Popeye got pissed.

Fun fact: Popeye the Sailor Man isn't actually all that strong by Danish or Norwegian standards...

... but he's strong to the Finnish!

What is Popeye's favorite Led Zeppelin song?

Olive My Love

If you combine Basil, Parmesan, Pinenuts and Olive Oil you get Pesto. What do you get when you mix Olive Oil, Spinach and Sweet Peas?

You get the comic and cartoon classic Popeye.

A woman treated her dry hair

A woman treated her dry hair with olive oil before washing it. Worried that the oil might leave a smell, she washed her hair with shampoo several times. That night, in bed, she asked her husband, "Do I smell like Olive Oil?" He sniffed a little and replied "Why? Do I smell like Popeye?"

How delicious is the new Popeye's chicken sandwich?

It's so good I just came in my pants... didn't even want to waste time putting on a shirt or shoes.

What's the only Papally-approved fast food chain in the US?

Popeyes

I got olive oil in my bed

Shhhh... Don't tell Popeye!

Due to global climate change the world is set to experience a loss in olive oil

Now we can all understand the heartache Popeye felt after the tragic end of his wife.

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Dirty Johnny is in Sunday School when the teacher asks the class,

"What happened when Jesus went to Mount Olive?"

Johnny's hand shot up. Since Johnny never raised his hand, the teacher called on him.

Johnny knowingly grinned and yelled, "Popeye kicked the out of him".

Why can't Popeye the Sailor's enemies ever predict whether or not he's purchased spinach that day?

Because no one expects the spinach acquisition!!!

What is Oberyn Martell's favorite cartoon?

Popeye

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Day 299 without having

I ate two Popeyes biscuits without water so it could choke me

Whats long, black and hard to cut into?

The line at ~~Kentucky Fried Chicken.~~ Popeyes
Edit Thanks /u/SatanicOnion

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On his recent trip to Israel, Pope Francis went to Mount Olive.

When he found out, Popeye was pissed and kicked his .

What is Glenn's (The Walking Dead) favorite restaurant? ***SPOILERS***

Popeyes!

Why does Trump like KFC better than Popeye's Chicken?

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