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A Russian, an American, and a British admiral were having a drink on an American aircraft carrier. They were talking about the bravery of their sailors

.

The Russian said, “I will demonstrate the bravery of our sailors.”

He calls a sailor over and says, “Jump off the ship. Swim under it and climb back up.”

The sailor promptly salutes and jumps off the flight deck, swims under the ship, climbs up the davits and stands in front o...

What do you do with a drunken sailor? What do you do with a drunken sailor? What do you do with a drunken sailor early in the morning?

Don't let him drive that cargo freighter,

don't let him steer that cargo freighter,

don't let him near that cargo freighter,

early in the morning.

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A sailor is recruited onto a Pirate ship...

After swearing loyalty to the Captain and crew, and receiving his daily list of duties, the new recruit is brought up onto the poop deck to briefly meet the Captain. The Captain, a rugged-looking pirate with a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and an eye-patch, is an intimidating-looking man indeed.
<...

Sailor, name a species of lemur

Aye-aye, captain!

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A burly sailor gets brought into an infirmary staffed by a bunch of postulate nuns, girls barely 18 preparing to become full nuns, and of course, supervised by a few gruff looking nuns.

Being good Catholics in a small Newfoundland seaside town, such oddities rarely found their way to their front door. The elder nuns insisted that only they would attend to him. The next evening there was a crash and a scream!! The sister ran out the door as fast as she could.

Sister Marry Cla...

Sailor 1: Have you seen what happened to the rope?

Sailor 2: Afraid not

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A young sailor (loooong)NSFW

A young sailor who just got married, was sent out to sea shortly after his honeymoon. Having been a virgin when he got married he soon was “frustrated”. The Skipper of the ship frequently walked the passageways talking to his sailors. On once such tour he met the young man. The young sailor when ask...

Roman Sailors

Roman sailors always replied to a command by saying, "2, sir".

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The sailor and the pirate

One day, a sailor met a pirate. The pirate has a peg leg, a hook, and an eyepatch. The sailor asked the pirate, “How did you get your peg leg?” The pirate replied, “Aargh, a whale bit me leg off.” Next, the sailor asked, “How did you get your hook?” The pirate replied, “Me crew was in a battle with ...

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A sailor and a priest were playing golf.

The sailor took his first shot and it sliced wide right. The sailor said "Ah fuck, I missed."

The priest replied, surprised, "My son, you shouldn't speak that way or God will punish you."

The sailor took aim for his next shot and hooked it badly to the left, "I fucking missed again!"...

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Two sailors are on shore leave. They have a few drinks and decide to go to a variety show. At the intermission one of them needs to pee and asks directions from the usher. “Go through the exit, turn left along the corridor, turn first right, then left, then right again,” he says.

The sailor follows the directions with some difficulty, relieves himself, and eventually finds his way back to his seat. “You missed the best act,” says his friend. “While you were gone a sailor came on-stage and pissed into the orchestra pit.”

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A male whale and a female whale were swimming off the coast of Japan when they noticed a whaling ship.

The male whale recognized it as the same ship that had harpooned his father many years earlier. He said to the female whale, "Lets both swim under the ship and blow out of our air holes at the same time and it should cause the ship to turn over and sink."

They tried it and sure enough, the s...

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(OC) A Russian sailor was constipated.

He said to the cook, “I like the cooking but I can’t use the washroom.” The cook said to the sailor “oh you don’t know the rope trick? All the sailors do it.” The sailor asked about the trick and the cook replied “just tie up the string and swallow it and you’ll be fine by tomorrow.”

The next...

What do you call a group of sailors that eat turnovers?

Pie-rates

What is the favorite boat of a sailor who really values the people in his life?

The friend ship

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A sailor and a marine walk into a bathroom at a bar

They both do their business, the sailor goes to wash his hands -- the marine heads to the door. The sailor sees this and says "You know, in the NAVY they taught us to wash our hands after we use the bathroom". The marine looks back at him and says "Oh yeah? Well, in the marines they taught us not to...

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Dirty Whale joke

A male and female whale were swimming in an ocean. They noticed a whaling ship sailing nearby. The male whale told the female whale: "This is the same ship that was used to kill my dad."

Then he proceeded to say: "I have a plan. Let's swim right below the ship, and use our blowholes at once. ...

Why couldn’t the sailor play cards?

Because the captain was standing on the deck

A sailor enters a sketchy watering hole. In the entrance a sign reads: Sausage roll 10$

And underneath it continues: Hand job 13$

A curvy barmaid is at the bar. He approaches her.

- Are you the one giving the hand jobs?
- Yes my sweet, are you feeling lonely? Do you want one?

He says

- No I will need you to sanitize your hands though...

(taking ...

Did you hear about the sailor who turned into a pumpkin pie?

He's a squashbuckling pirate

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What do you call a sailor who likes to get tied up and gagged during sex?

A submarine

Red sky at night: sailor’s delight

Blue sky at night: day

Do you know about 3.14% of sailors?

They're π-rates.

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What do you call a dating app for sailors?

Dick Dock

Where do sailors go when they feel sick?

The docktor!

Washing hands

(Joke was funnier before covid)

A soldier and a sailor are at a bar near where they are both stationed. They are standing next to each other at urinals and the soldier gets done first and washes his hands. The sailor gets done and goes right toward the door instead of washing his hands
...

A sailor says to his captain,

"Captain, we are under attack by a boat!"

The captain replied, "Go get me my red jacket."

Puzzled, the sailor asks why.

"So the enemy doesn't know that I've been wounded," replies the captain.

The sailor says ok, and runs off to fight. They won the battle.

The next...

A soldier, airman, marine, and a sailor walk into a bar...

The soldier boasts, "Our camouflage is so good, we put 50 men in the desert and only 20 were found."

The airman retorts, "That's nothing. Our camouflage is so effective, we put 50 jets in the sky, and only 15 were found!"

The marine says, with a big grin, "Amateurs, our camouflage is s...

Why are sailors so indecisive...?

Because they're always far from shore

Why are French sailors afraid to count?

The last one to do it got safely to four but then he cinq.

My Papa was a World War 2 Navy veteran and he use to boast about how he saved 300+ sailors from dying from an excruciating death

He shot the cook

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Sailor has some balls

Two Generals of the Army and Marines are joined by an Admiral of the Navy around a campfire off the landing zone doing shots of rye whiskey when someone calls out and asks who’s got the most balls.

The Marine General goes all right and says, “Marine,” over the radio, “I want you to take that ...

What did the Shanghaied sailor say to the bosun?

"Well, I'm impressed."

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A sailor and an airman were in a base restroom at the same time. Both used the urinals. After completing his business, the sailor zipped up his fly and turned to leave. The airman glowered at him. "In the Air Force, they teach us to wash our hands after using the restroom."

"Oh yeah?" the sailor replied. "Well, in the Navy they teach us not to piss on our hands."

There once was a sailor from Brighton

Who said to his gal, "You're a tight 'un."

She said, "Upon my soul!

You're in the wrong hole!

There's plenty of room in the right 'un"

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Sailors and Sex

A newly recruited sailor is preparing for this first long journey.

Aboard the ship, he's making acquaintances and realizes that there are no women on board.

He asks one the captain. "Captain, what does everyone do when they get horny after being out at sea for so long?" to which the c...

Mac the sailor docked at New York after a frustrating three-month voyage. Unfortunately he'd lost most of his pay playing poker on board ship, so when he eventually found a lady of the night, all he could offer her was $0.50 and a pair of sneakers.

She refused with disdain.

He wandered around in search of a more accommodating girl, but was refused time and time again. Eventually he found a more sympathetic lady who told him that although she could not possibly accept his offer herself, he could always try Mabel down the road. But she wa...

What vegetables are a sailors enemy?

leeks!

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An American sailor walks up to a urinal and starts peeing...

... A few seconds later, a fellow Irish sailor goes to the urinal next to him and starts peeing. The American's eyes start to wander, and he can't help but look down at the Irish man's penis and notice a "W" and "Y" tattooed down there. "I'm really sorry that I looked over," says the American, "bu...

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A sailor who just finished his training boarding his designated ship

The captain awaits on the boat and tells him


"let me show you around"

they starts walking around the ship and the captain says:

"this here is your cabin, you will be sleeping here with another 4 crew mates"

They kept walking and the captain kept explaining everyt...

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Three sailors are discussing their cargo

They are used to transporting goods and make a good living doing so, this time however they've been tasked with taking 300 boxes of penis shaped potatoes across the channel and they all think it's a joke.

"We'll be a laughing stock" says the first sailor.

"I'll never be able to live ...

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A sailor walks into a bar

The barkeep asks, "How did you end up with that peg leg?"

And the pirate replies, "A cannon ball blasted out the deck and took me leg with it."

"Why do you have that hook?"

"Arrrgh! We was looting a ship and lost me hand in a sword fight."

"And the eye patch?"

"I l...

romanian joke: 300 sailors and one woman get shipwrecked on an island

After one month, completely disgusted by what the sailors have been doing to her, the woman kills herself.

After another month, completely disgusted by what they did that month, the sailors decide to bury her.

After another month, completely disgusted by what they've been doing, th...

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I just read this strange new book about a dark blue star exploding out of a sailor's belly button

It's a novel naval navel navy nova novel

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A sailor meets a pirate in a bar.

They take turns boasting about their great conquests and adventures on the ocean. The sailor is curious about the pirate's peg leg, hook, and eyepatch.

"How did you end up with a peg-leg?" he asks.

"We were in a storm and I was swept overboard. I started climbing back onto the ship, bu...

A shipwrecked mariner has spent several years on a deserted island, completely alone.

Then one morning he was thrilled to see a ship offshore and a smaller vessel pulling out towards him.

When the boat grounded on the beach, the officer in charge handed the marooned sailor a bundle of newspapers and told him: “The captain said to read through these and let us know if you still...

One sailor said to another, "Did you know that starfishes have mouths in the center of their bodies?"

"Yup," the other sailor nods, replying, "And mermaids use them as bras!"

Why are portholes/windows in boats round?

So the water doesn’t hit the sailors square in the face!

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A sailor and a priest are playing golf...

The sailor takes a shot. He places the ball down, smacks it with the club, and watches as it goes flying straight into a sand trap. The sailor mumbles to himself

“Fuck, I missed...”

The priest, hearing him, immediately snaps round and says

“Young man! Please do not use such awf...

If Apple was a pirate ship, what would their sailors wear?

An iPatch

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A captain was showing a sailor around the ship

The captain says “here is where you sleep. Make sure to keep your side clean as the pope” the sailor says “yes sir” and they move on. The captain shows the sailor the ammunition room and says “if you’re thinking of suicide don’t come in here. We have cameras everywhere understand?” The sailor says “...

Why can't Popeye the Sailor's enemies ever predict whether or not he's purchased spinach that day?

Because no one expects the spinach acquisition!!!

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A well-dressed man, complete with top hat and monocle, walks into a bar.

The bartender, who has seen it all, pours the dapper gentleman two fingers of their top-shelf 25-year-old scotch. Just as the man begins nursing the peaty, smoky booze, a rabbi, a priest, and a minister all walk into the bar, arguing about how to prove the existence of their respective Gods.

...

A sailor walks into a bar and sits down next to a pretty woman.

Sailor: Do you like men in uniform?

Woman: I like the army and the air force, but sailors annoy me.

Sailor: Why's that?

Woman: They just overuse nautical terminology so much. That sort of thing is really irritating.

Sailor: I guess you're starboard about that. My wife sai...

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A priest hooks a huge fish

A priest hooks a huge fish

Helping him reel it in, a sailor says "Whoa, look at the size of that fucker!".

"Hey, mind your language!" says the priest.

Embarrassed, the sailor thinks quickly and blurts out, "Sorry father, but that's what this fish is called, it's a Fucker fish".<...

A joke from Ukraine about cultural differences [my translation].

[edit - grammar]

In a psychological experiment, three women - Arab, French, and Ukrainian - are asked the same question: "suppose you survive a shipwreck and are stranded on an uninhabited tropical island ... with fifteen brutal, muscular, stressed-out sailors, and noone else, what would you ...

What did the sailor say to the sea monster before it destroyed his ship?

"What's Kraken?

A 90 year old man goes to the doctor.

Full disclosure, I got this joke from Tom Jones on Marc Maron's WTF podcast today. Tom's 80, mentally spry like he's 30, and he swears like a sailor.

----
90 year old man goes to the doctor.
Says “Doctor, it used to be that I’d get these erections so hard that I couldn’t even bend them ...

Norwegian naval ships all have large bar codes painted on their hulls...

So when they return to port a sailor can scan da navy in.

A sailor brings his boat up to a restaurant dock to eat lunch.

The dock hand says, “I’m sorry, sir, but I can’t let you dine here today. This establishment has a necktie policy, and you are not wearing one.”

“Of course I don’t have a tie on,” replied the sailor, “I’m on a boat!”

“Well, go down below and put one on,” said the dock hand.

“I d...

doctor 1: this sailor broke his nose from crashing onto land.

doctor 1: Luckily they're just mariner injuries.

doctor 2: are you shore? they seem pretty bad to me.

doctor 1: nonsense, you can seafarer self.

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A female and a male whale were swimming through the ocean.

They spot a ship up ahead and the male whale turns to the female whale and
says: "Hey I have an idea... why don't you swim over, underneath the ship,
and blow air out your blow hole, knock the ship over and gobble up all the
sailors?" The female responds "Hey! I do not mind the blow j...

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A young sailor about to on his first ever around the world cruise" visits his grandfather, a retired Admiral.

"Gramps, I'm so excited to go on my first cruise," he says.



"Well, son, let me see your pack so I can make sure you're taking everything you need," says the grandfather.



The sailor goes and grabs his suitcase. He opens it for his grandfather to inspect, only to get smac...

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An American woman is standing on a bridge preparing to commit suicide when a local sailor approaches her.

The woman tells the sailor that her boyfriend had left her and she had nothing left in this world to live for, so she was going to jump.


The sailor insisted that she must not do that, and said that tomorrow, he will be going on a ship to Europe, and invited her to come with him to start a...

Who would have Jay-Z married if he was a sailor?

Buoyancy.

Two sailors on a boat each wanted to smoke.

However, they could not find their lighters.

So, they threw a cigarette overboard to make the boat a cigarette lighter.

Captain John McGrue was one of the most respected explorers

Born in England, he became known for his seafaring skills at a young age. At the age of 20, he heard the legends of the greatest drinks in the world, a quest many explorers had tried, but unfortunately none could complete the trip. McGrue was talked out of it by every friend, until at 28, already an...

A Sailor is on his first day on a destroyer

and his Superior is giving him tour. They approach a room with a single 55 gallon barrel in the center of it.

“What’s this?” the young Sailor ask.

“Oooh that. Well Sailor, we are out to sea for long periods of time and we have certain needs. So anytime you get the urge you just whip it...

Sail on, sailor

Man to his wife: "If I died before you, would you remarry?".
Wife: "Oh well I'd have to think about it but yes, I probably would."
Man: "Would you stay in this house?"
Wife: "Well, it's a nice house dear, I think I would"
Man: "Would you sleep in this bed?"
Wife: "I like the bed, it's...

A sailor walks into a bar and strikes up a conversation with another man...

The guy asks him: “So how many of the 7 seas have you sailed?”

The pirate responds “7!! There aren’t 7 seas lad, there are 26 and I’ve sailed 25”

“Oh really which seas have you sailed?”

“Well I’ve sailed
the A Sea,
the B Sea,
the C Sea,
the D Sea,
the E Sea,
th...

A sailor returns to the shore after a month at sea.

Sailor: "Land ho!"


Girlfriend: "If you keep calling me that I'm going to stop coming to meet you."

What would you call Popeye The sailor man if he was a camera man?

Popeye DSLR Man

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Once there was a sailor who dreamt of finding the love of his life.

He sailed to the Middle East in search of a genie to grant him this wish. After a long, challenging journey, the sailor reaches his destination and sets out to find himself a lamp. Months of vigorous searching pass and eventually he finds his bounty in an isolated cave. The genie appears and asks th...

What did the cyclops sailor say to his captain?

Eye captain

A sailor lands a shore after 3 months at sea

He heads straight for the brothel and grabs the nearest hooker, he takes her upstairs and get straight to business

After 10 minutes he asks the hooker "how am i doing?"

"About 3 knots" she says.

"3 knots?!" The sailor said puzzled.

"Yes, you're not hard, you're not in, an...

A sailor comes back one morning after a long time at sea

His best buddy died on the ship, so he goes announcing the news, first thing, to his widow. One thing led to another and they are starting to undress, but she suddenly stares at him and stops, asking:

-Why are you only half mast?

-It’s mourning wood

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What did the sailor say to the prostitute?

It was a business doing pleasure with you.

A wise old pirate captain has captured a group of merchant sailors, but he tells them that he will spare their lives if they can answer a question: What is a pirate's favorite letter?

The first sailor, with a smug look on his face, haughtily walks up to the captain and says "Obviously it's RRRRRRR!". The captain slowly shakes his head and says "RRRRRR you kidding me?" before throwing the sailor overboard to the sharks. The second sailor, a little wary now but still feeling confid...

When is a sailor made of wood?

When he's a board.

A captain and a sailor are on a ship.

One day the sailor drinks a bit. The captain notes this down that the sailor was drunk. The sailor pleads him to add that he was drunk but it was only once in eight years or else he may lose his job. The captain declines this saying whatever he has written is the truth.
Next day it is the turn of...

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A sailor and a female model survive a shipwreck.

A ship sinks, and a sailor and a female model manage to swim to an unpopulated island. There are enough resources for them to survive, so they start to live there, eventually becoming a couple. After two years, the sailor suddenly looks at the model with a desperate expression, and says" "I cannot t...

What do sailor do with fat girls?

Give them a wide berth

A sailor leaves his wife to join the navy.

He writes to his wife that he is on an island surrounded by beautiful women and while he will try to be faithful, he needs something to distract himself from the war.
His wife writes back but sends a package along with her letter. The letter reads, "here's an accordion. I want you to practic...

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A man buys a heavily discounted parrot from a pet store. As he's walking down the street, the parrot squawks obscenities at passersby.

Eventually, the man runs into the priest of his church.

"Good afternoon my son," said the priest. "And who might your feathered friend be?"

"FUCK YOU!" squawks the parrot.

"I'm terribly sorry," said the man, "I fully intend to break him of this obscene habit. I'll even teach him...

Why did the sailor find it hard to learn the alphabet?

Because he spent years at C.

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A sailor walks into a public restroom and up to

a urinal and as he begins to do his business, without fail a 10year-old boy walks in and sees and him he starts to shout, golly Gee Mr., golly are you really a sailor? The sailor looks down at the kid and says sure kid would you like to wear my hat? The boy responded with an excited golly Gee yes! S...

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So a sailor is submitted into the hospital

... with two broken arms. You know, a really tough guy, big muscles, lots of body hair and tattoos, a true seaman.

So the two nurses that have to wash him since his arms are broken meet in the halls and one says to the other:

"hey that sailor has a very funny tattoo on his willy, righ...

A drunken sailor gives a hooker $200, and they proceed to a back bedroom...

After a few minutes, the sailor asks, "How'm I doin'?"

"About three knots," says the hooker.

"Three knots?" asks the sailor. "Whaddya mean?"

And the hooker says, "You're knot hard, you're knot in, and you're knot getting your money back."

A guy adopts a pink parrot from an old sailor....

unfortunately, it swears like an old sailor. He tries everything to get it to stop. He even destroyed the parrot's old cage, but that just made it worse. Then he noticed his mom coming up to the house. What could he do? He couldn't let his dear sweet mother hear this foul mouthed bird. So, he p...

Why do sailors eat so many carrots?

It helps them sea better.

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A Sailor walks in the bathroom to go piss

As he walks in, he sees a kid standing there.
The kid looks up and asks, "Mister, are you a sailor?"
The sailor says that he is and asks the kid if he wants to wear his hat.
The kids nods his head and puts it on.
A minute later, a Marine walks in and goes over to the urinal.
The kid l...

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A single mother asked her dad what she should do because her young sons were starting to curse like sailors...

He told her the next time one of them said a bad word to smack him in the mouth and send him to his room.

The next morning at breakfast the boys came into the kitchen and the mother asked them what they would like for breakfast...

The oldest son replied... I want some fucking Cheerios...

What DO you do with a drunken sailor?

Make a Disney Trilogy featuring an evil Scottish octopus and rake in the money

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A sailor on a Navy ship...

A sailor on a Navy ship had been out to sea for weeks, and was beginning to go through sex withdrawals. Fed up with the lack of sex, he asked one of his shipmates what he did when the pressure was too much to take. 

"Well, there's a barrel with a hole in it near the mop storage. When it gets ...

A young lady, jobless and spurned by her lover, heads to the Manhattan docks to drown herself.

She has nothing, no friends, no family, she just wants to end it all.

And as she's about to jump, a handsome young sailor shouts, "stop! Don't do it!!"


And she says, "I've nothing in this world, I might as well end it!"


And he says, "Listen, listen. It's a rotten world, ...

A research shows that 96.86% of people in the sea are sailors.

The rest are  πrates

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A man's yatch capsizes and he is about to drown in the middle of the ocean

Loudly he proclaimes "Nothing to fear! My lord will save me!"

A tug boat comes by and the sailor spots the man

"It's your lucky day mate, jump in and I'll take you to shore"

The man replies, "thankyou for the kind offer but I have no fear, my lord will save me!"

"Suit you...

3 sailors crash their boat while sailing close to the shore of an unexplored island.

After moving inland, they are captured by members of an indigenous tribe. The tribesmen take the sailors to their chief. The chief, in very broken English, speaks to them,

"You trespass here, now I have test for you. Go deep into forest. Pick for me 3 fruits, and return to me. The test begins...

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So this guy applied to leave the USSR. Part of the process was random police searches for anti soviet material. Unfortunately for him, he had a parrot that would curse Stalin in language that would make a sailor’s ears bleed.

One day he hears a knock on the door. The loud rapping of the KGB. Thinking quickly, he grabs the parrot and stuffs him in the freezer where he was hoarding a frozen chicken. The KGB do their inspection and leave with a grunt of approval. Once they leave he gets the half frozen parrot out and thaws ...

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A Marine, a Navy Sailor, and an Air Force Pilot are all captured by an ISIS Witch Doctor..

The Witch Doctor goes to each of the men and says "I will grant you all one wish, however at the end you will be killed and made a part of my tent."

The sailor is up first and says "I wish to see my girlfriend one last time" the witch doctor conjures the sailors girlfriend and they say goodby...

A sailor is stationed on an exotic island for months...

He writes to his wife and tells her "I miss you so much, and I'm surrounded by gorgeous island woman every day. I need something to keep my mind off of them so I don't cheat."

The wife responds with a package and a letter that says "I miss you, too, and I have a solution to your predicament. ...

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Life of a sailor

A Sailor is back from deployment and comes into the bar all moody and pissed off. He orders a double whiskey at the bar. Then he starts rambling on about how lousy a wife he’s got until the bartender says …

“I don’t know what you’re complaining about. All the other guys in here have nothing b...

A man lost at sea is found on an island 20 years later.

The sailors that find him are surprised to see three large buildings on the island. They ask the man why he built the buildings. "This first building is my house" he says. "I was able to set up a crude aqueduct to create some form of indoor plumbing". The sailors are impressed and ask about the ...

A Voyage to Italy

A young woman from New York was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean, but just before she could throw herself from the docks, a handsome young man stopped her.

"You have so much to live for," said the man. "I'm a sailor, and we are off to Italy tomo...

What do you call a drunken sailor?

Hard to Port.

What did the sailor yell to the woman standing on shore?

Land ho!

Bob the Sailor & Ollie the Octopus walk into a bar...

Bob the sailor walks into a bar carrying a large octopus. He announces to the bar that this octopus can not only talk, but he has a very unique talent which he will share with the crowd for $50 a turn.

Bartender says "There's no way that octopus can talk."

"Sure he can. Ollie, tell the...

Two sailors are on deck looking out to sea.

In the distance, a huge hand rises from the water.

It keeps rising as the wrist and forearm become visible, the fingers stretching into the air. It wobbles back and forward then falls, crashing into the sea.

One sailor turns to the other and asks, 'Did you see the size of that wave?

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A sailor walked into a bar after a long time at sea.

Desperate to get down to business, he walked up to a sexy blonde and asked, “Hey baby, do you like sea men?”

She replied, “Not really. Too salty!”

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A marine and a sailor are walking down the street...

When they spot a sheep with its head stuck in a fence. The pair race up to the sheep, where the marine drops his pants and begins fucking the sheep. After a few minutes he finishes, take a step back and asks the sailor "you want to give it a shot?"

The sailor replies "hell ya" and promptly s...

What's a sailor's least favorite color?

Maroon.

Just some cake, please

Nothing looked good on the chow hall/mess line, so he only selected a large piece of chocolate cake.

The cook asked him, "Is that all you're gonna eat?"

To which the sailor replied, "Yeah, the rest of the choices don’t look too appealing to me."

The cook grinned at the sailor a...

A sailor has just signed up to join a Transatlantic trade crew for their latest voyage...

The rest of the crew have worked together for years, so he's the only newbie. Initially, it seems to be a pretty ordinary job.

However, after the initial work of loading the ship and leaving the harbor was done, he noticed something weird.

During lunch or dinner, whenever most of the c...

Colored Sailors

A ship loaded with blue paint collided with a ship carrying red paint.
Both ships sink.
The Sailors were marooned.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What does a cannibalistic homosexual sailor eat?

Semen.

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