Planned Parenthood Jokes - 13 Hilarious Planned Parenthood Jokes

What's the worst part about locking your keys in your car outside of a Planned Parenthood?

Going inside to ask for a coat hanger.

I got fired from my job at Planned Parenthood

My boss didn’t like me saying “Takeout or delivery?” whenever someone walked in the door

Planned Parenthood as a train:

Conductor: “All Aboorrttttttt!”

A Jewish mother walks by a planned parenthood and sees a protestor who’s sign says “life begins at conception”

She goes up to the man and says “that may be true of Christian babies, but a Jewish fetus isn’t viable until it graduates medical school!”

Our local planned parenthood refuses to provide homeless women with abortions.

They say beggars can't be choosers.

Happy birthday to both reddit and planned parenthood...

My favorite two things keeping me from getting a girl pregnant.

What would you call Laura Croft if she worked at Planned Parenthood?

Womb Raider

Putting the new dry cleaner shop next to the Planned Parenthood was probably a bad idea.

All those discarded wire hangers in the dumpster aren’t helping the cause.

If Carly Fiorina really wants to destroy Planned Parenthood, she should become its CEO

Every time a character in a TV Show says “another round please” they’re immediately handed a drink by an attentive bartender.

But every time I do it all they say is:

“For the last time, I’m not a bartender. This is planned parenthood. You need to leave.”

Like okay! I get it I’m not rich and famous!

If you want to keep unwanted people out of America,

Instead of building a wall, don't defund Planned Parenthood

Pro-life or Pro-choice?

I'm really unsure how to feel about planned parenthood and abortion. I mean, on one hand I'm all for killing babies but on the other I don't like giving women a choice.

Damn...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I drive an old car with shitty locks

and I locked my keys in it outside a mall. I've done this before, and know exactly what to do, so I went to the nearest store and asked if they had a coat hanger I could borrow. They don't find that amusing in Planned Parenthood centers.

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