TIL they dont eat Eggs Benedict in Kenya

They've got strict anti-poaching laws

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In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Louisiana State University .

On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee, inspected the elephants foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully ...

How dads of kenya motivates their kids?

by saying: 'kenya do this?'

On my recent trip to Kenya, I booked a hotel within walking distance of the beach.

You can’t imagine how far the Kenyans would walk.

I visited Kenya...

I was in Kenya for holiday and decided to visit a poor village. There I met a married couple who told me about their everyday life. The wife told how she makes clothes for a living and makes 1.75 dollars a day. The husband was a farmer who only made 2 dollars a day.

It broke my heart. I felt ...

What kind of exercises are all the rage in Kenya?

Anairobics.

Hunter...

Two hunters fly to Kenya, where they bag six gazelles. As the crew is loading the small plane to return, the pilot says the aircraft can take only four gazelles back.

“Last time, the pilot let us take all six, and he had the same plane as yours,” argues the first hunter.

Reluctantly, t...

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Everything is at stake during this year's Ms Universe final. But Ms Kenya keeps stepping on Ms Australia's foot...

Ah! Kenya fucken not mate!

What do you call the western half of Kenya?

Kenya West

Stevie Wonder is playing his first gig in Kenya

at the Carnivore Restaurant and the place is absolutely packed to the rafters. In a bid to break the ice with his new audience, He asks if anyone would like him to play a request.

A little old Kikuyu man jumps out of his seat in the first row and shouts at the top of his voice "Play a Jazz ch...

Kenya?

Yukon.

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Seeing Kenya on a map is like seeing a pussy for the first time.

It's lower than I thought it was.

Definite proof Obama is related to Kenya

They both can't rap.

My wife is leaving me because of my obsession with Africa...

Kenya believe it? I'm Ghana miss her!

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A man walks into a bar and pulls a minuscule person out of his pocket

They sit at one of the tables, waiting for a friend of theirs. Meanwhile, they order drinks: a whisky for the man, and a thimble of whisky for Peter, his minuscule friend.
The person they were waiting for arrives, and they start talking about the pair's last travel:
-The landscapes in Keny...

Can You Name A Country?

Kenya?

Why did Africa pull a prank on Europe?

He thought he was GHANA get away with it. KENYA blame him? He's BENIN worse situations before. OMAN, I gotta stop. I can't BELIZE i'm saying these words right now. There's NORWAY anybody is gonna find this funny. Nothing ISRAEL to me anymore. How much do you want TIBET this will get downvoted to obl...

Can you name even one East African country?

Well, Kenya?

Did you know Obama was from Hawaii

Kenya believe it?

A research group was engaged in a study..

A research group was engaged in a study of longevity in mammals and had recently focused their attention on a particular species of porpoise, which they studied from their floating laboratory off the coast of Baja Mexico. They came to believe that, if fed just the right combination of nutrients, thi...

Punchline not included.

Timmy : I'm Hungary.

Mum : Why don't you Czech the fridge.

Timmy : Ok, I'm Russian to the kitchen.

Mum : Hmm...maybe you'll find some Turkey.

Timmy : Yeah, but its all covered in Greece. Yuck !

Mum : There is Norway you can eat that.

Timmy : I know, I gu...

Its not surprising that Republicans lost two presidental races to Obama

In long races usually the guy from Kenya wins.

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Food and Country

Yesterday I was so Hungary, I decided to Czech if there was any food.
I was Russian to the fridge, but found only a Turkey full of Greece.
Iran to the store to get some salt, pepper, Chile and Korea-nder, because I was in the mood for some Sweden sour.
I found Iraq of pork chops but there w...

I'm really glad that Obama won in 2008 and was able to be the first black president of the United States of America

his back up job was to be the first white president of Kenya.

Map jokes

How do you get around in Italy? You Rome.
Why does everyone love Thailand? They Bangkok.
I Congo to Africa, Kenya?
Why do the French take there time? They hate to Russia
What's the unhappiest state? Misery
Who are the unhappiest Europeans? The Hungary ones.
Why are the so many Subw...

in response to a deleted post: How do you apologise when you're wrong? [knock knock joke]

Me: knock knock
(assuming they're still speaking to me and know what to say next)
Them: Who's there?
Me: Kenya Fork
Them: ...Kenya Fork who?
Me: Ken ya forg-ive me?! I'm sorry

(Works well to distract them from the fact that you were wrong about something by the lameness of the...

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