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Miss Out Jokes

These vaccinated kids miss out on so much in life and it's disgusting

Polio, measles, rubella, typhoid, the list just goes on and on really

It's the first day of college, and the girls are finishing up orientation with the Dean of Women.

"In conclusion, ladies, if you get pregnant, you'll likely have to drop out and miss out on many of your dreams. Think about it: is that one hour of pleasure worth a lifetime of commitment?"

"Now," the Dean says, "Are there any questions?"

"Yeah," says a voice from the back. "How do yo...

Sheeps

3 sheep farmers, an Australian and a New Zealander and a Welshman are in a bar having a drink and chatting.

The Welshman asks the other two in what position they have relations with their sheep if needs become desperate.

The Kiwi says "Well, I'll grab a sheep by the back legs like a wh...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A husband got a new job

A husband got a new job and had to go on his first ever business trip.

This was especially tough because he and his wife made love every other day and he was going to be gone for a week.

He didn’t want his wife to miss him, or miss out on her regular orgasm, so he decided to buy her a ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

3 farmers were talking about how they have sex with their sheep. The first one said “I put it’s back legs down my wellies so it can’t run off”. The second said “I put its back legs down my wellies and it’s front legs over a wall, gives a different position”

The third says “I put its back legs down my wellies, with it facing me and put its front legs over my shoulders”
“Why do you do that” asked the others, “well, I don’t want to miss out on the kissing”

Edit - Wellies = Wellington Boots = Gum Boots = Rubber Boots

A newly married man had to work interstate for a week

He didn’t want his new bride to miss out whilst he was away, so be bought her a vibrator.

After a couple of days, he asked her if she was enjoying the new toy.

She told him that it was ok, but the only problem was that it knocked two of her teeth out.

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