Kart Jokes - 21 Hilarious Kart Jokes

My wife doesn't understand why I prefer to play Mario Kart over having relations with her

In Mario Kart, it is a GOOD thing when I finish first

Why was Mario’s kart missing?

It was Toad.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Day 173 without sex

Threw the blue shell in Mario Kart while I was already in first place to remember what it's like to get hit from behind.

Donald Trump must play Mario Kart.

Because he was in the lead but got hit by something blue at the end of the race.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Working from home is great! I’m basically getting paid $30 / hr to play Mario kart and have sex with my wife!

That’s like $3 per race and $0.50 every time I have sex!

Back when I was younger, I looked in the Mario Kart Wii manual and saw it had Classic Controller Support. I thought, "How the hell do you use that?"

Looking back now that I have a Wii again, I looked at my Wii remote and said, "How the hell did I use that?

President Trump decided to play Mario Kart with his cabinet

He thought that this would be be a good bonding exercise with his staff so he bought a Wii and ordered his whole office to come into the oval office

Once everyone arrived there was a huge argument on who would play as what character, because everyone wanted to be Mario. Trump decided that thi...

What do you call someone who has a favorite map on Mario Kart?

Racist.

Which course did Hillary Clinton select when playing Mario Kart?

The short circuit

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Therapist Joke.

So something happened to me recently.
You know a shenanigan gone wrong at work.

So because of that wrong doing, I was advised to seek mental guidance in the form of a person who was getting payed to listen to me.

Yes a therapist. Duh hoy.

So I met with said therapist, in whi...

That's my wife

So, two guys, one old and one young, are pushing their carts around a mall like they're in a real-life game of Mario Kart.

They collide, and the old guy turns to the young guy and says, 'Sorry about that, I'm just trying to find my wife. I'm getting up there in age, and my memory ain't what ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A teacher asks the children in her class what they done at the weekend...

"I went out for the day, and rode on the choo choo", said Billy.

"Billy", said the teacher, "we don't use childish and immature language in my class. You rode on a train... Steve?"

"My dad and I went go-karting but I crashed and got a boo boo", said Steve.

"Steve, I just said we...

My son is in hospital because of one little driving mistake.

He beat me at Mario Kart.

I hope Stephen Hawkins was an organ donor

I really need some parts for my go kart

Should I beat my kids?

I know I'm not supposed to, but they just make me so frustrated

My wife says I'm being irrational and getting wound up over nothing, and that if I beat them she'll be incredibly upset and won't even know what to say to me.

But you know when it's just the same stuff day in, day out. And...

Did Stephen Hawking have a donor card?

. .Cos I really need bits for my kids go-kart

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I hate it when my girlfriend constantly cheats

It’s the only way the stupid bitch can beat me at Mario Kart.

I'm not a racist, I love all races equally

Nascar, Formula 1, Mario Kart......

My boss phoned me.

"You're late."

I said, "I'm driving right now. Can't talk."

"Where are you?"

"I'm at the go-kart centre." I replied.

I don't always drink and drive. But when I do...

it's when I'm playing Mario Kart.

A good joke for a date

Joe takes Kelly to a carnival on a blind date. Joe asks, "what would you like to do first?" and Kelly replies, "I want to get weighed." So they visit the weight guesser who predicts that Kelly weighs 130 pounds. Since she only weighs 110 pounds, Kelly wins a stuffed animal.
Joe asks what she wou...

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