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Innit Jokes

If Stranger Things was British it’d be called

Bit Odd Innit?

Cop : you are driving on the wrong side of the road

Driver: Sorry, I‘m English

Cop: (shouting) Oii.. It‘s the rong soid of the roade ye was droivin down, innit?

Three old men are sitting on a park bench. The first says "Windy, innit?".

The second says "No. Thursdy.".

The third says "Me too. Let's go for a pint.".

Obvious, innit?

A guy was very self-conscious, because he'd been born without ears. Despite this, he'd become general manager at his company.

He was still self conscious though, so when interviewing people, he'd ask if they noticed anything about him, anything they could mention about him, and if people re...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A military officer by the name of Major Bed had arrived in Thailand for an undercover job...

For the job to be an utmost success, he needed to get plastic surgery to change his identity a bit as well as a new ID. He found a renowned doctor who also made fake ID's and made an appointment for the next day.

After he made the appointment, he had the full day to around so he decided ...

What do you call a chav in a box?

Innit.

What do you call a chav in a locked box?

Safe.

A travelling salesman walks into a bar...

He’s going over the menu when a local guy slides onto the stool next to him, and just says one word: “Waterloo.”

Guessing he’s onto something of a local speciality, he asks for one himself. He takes a deep swig and pulls a face: “This doesn’t taste like anything at all!!!” he exclaims.
...

Two English chavs

English chav 1: Oi lost moi dog, innit.
English chav 2: Blimey, you doin' something to find it?
English chav 1: Yeah, I put posters up all over town, didden oi.
English chav 2: Wot you put on the posters then?
English chav 1: Here boy

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sore Paws

Little Johnny calls his dad, 'Dad those two dogs over there, why is the one at the front giving the one at the back a ride?'

'Errr, hmm, well son, the one at the back has saw front paws, so the one at the front is giving him a lift home'

'It's always the same innit dad'

'What's ...

Old School Pirate Crime

Captain Normal Beard the up-and-coming pirate captain and his first mate Clumsy Edward were in desperate need of ink in order to make the numerous treasure maps they were sure create during all of their treasure-filled journeys. More than anything they needed red ink for the illustrious X's that wil...
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