UPJOKE
groundwaterwetirrigationlakeirrigatewatertroutpiscinehaddockbarracudafinanchovyminnowmackereltunny

In Water Jokes

Why do all vegetables sink when thrown in water?

The wheelchair weighs them down

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

You can tell the sex of an ant by dropping it in water.

If they float, they're boy-ant.

What do you call a dog floating in water?

A good buoy

Is sodium just as dangerous as francium in water?

Na not really

I boiled some noodles in water

It was Pho Nominal

A British trawler is sailing off the coast of Germany when suddenly the ship starts taking in water.

The ship is sinking fast and the captain immediately gets on the radio to contact the German coast guard.

"Help!" he exclaims, "We're sinking! We're sinking!"

A hesistant voice comes from the radio. "Um...v-vot are you sinking about?"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

TIL you can determine the sex of an ant by dropping it in water

Sinks - girl ant
Floats - boy ant

TIL, Hippos can run faster than humans on land and swimmer faster in water

But still you can defeat them in a triathlon as they don't know how to ride a bicycle

Oreo’s in Water

You dip your Oreo’s in water…
Because your dad never came back with the milk.

Why do dogs float in water?

Because they’re good buoys.

A guy was baptized and dipped in water 3 times.

After the third dip, the Priest said: "You are now baptized, you are a new creation. The old one is gone, no more drinking of alcohol for you. Your new name is Gomes."
Gomes went back home and headed straight for the fridge. He took a Kingfisher Beer, dipped it in water 3 times and said: "You a...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do elephants make love in water?

Well, how else do you keep a two tonne fanny wet for two hours?

I simmered ten comedians in water for 6 hours.

and made a laughing stock.

Why do fish swim in water?

Because their leg do not reach the bottom.

A mathematician, a physicist and an engineer are tasked with finding the volume of a rubber ball.

The mathematician takes the ball, measures its diameter, then calculates the volume. The physicist submerges the ball in water and measures the amount of water displaced. The engineer twists and turns the ball, looking for the model number.

Do trans girls float in water?

After all, they are boy’nt

Why scuba divers always flip backwards when jumping from boat in water?

Because if they flip forward they would still be in boat.

Dropped some rice in water

so I put it in a bag of cellphones to dry out

I put some of my grandmother's ashes in water...

Instagram.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did dinosaurs have sex in water?

You try keeping a ten ton pussy wet.

Why does the Buddha float in water?

Because he’s enlightened

Why did the Bear dissolve in water?

He was polar

Two bears are swimming in water, a black bear and a white bear. Which one dissolves?

The white one, because it's polar.

Why does pillsbury doughboy hate being in water?

because hes dunkin dough nuts!

If you drop your phone in water you should place it in a bowl of rice.

Asian people are attracted to the rice and are very good at repairing electronic devices.

NB. Thanks for being good sports Asian people!

My jokes are like eucalyptus steeped in water

Koala-tea

My friend Claire predicted she'd be able to float in water

Guess she thought she was Claire bouyant.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.