My wife has an eccentric but harmless new habit. She started taking a fish to bed with her. It didn’t really bother me until last night.
When I suggested we have sex, she replied: “Not tonight, dear, I have a haddock.”
What do you call a fish that won’t walk away from a poker table?
A gambling haddock.
I went to Bill Hayleys fish shop last night
They do Hake, Haddock and Sole
So everyone is getting mad at me after telling jokes about marine wildlife
I think it's a turtle over reaction. It just being shellfish and it's giving me a bad haddock. I mean, I don't do them on porpoise...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Why did the fisherman never get any sex?
His wife always had a haddock.
What did the fisherman tell his amorous wife?
Not tonight, honey, I've got a haddock.
An Italian goes into a noisy fish market
He goes up and down the aisles looking for a particular fish and can't find it.
In frustration, he then goes to counter and shouts over the noise "DOA YOU HAVE A HADDOCK"
"No I took to aspirin and now i feel fine"
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