My girlfriend told me to stop impersonating a flamingo...
I had to put my foot down
I can't believe I was arrested for impersonating a politician!
I was just sitting there doing nothing!
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
My friends keep telling me to stop impersonating butter.
But I can't. I'm on a roll now
What do you call someone impersonating a crustacean?
A shrimposter.
I don't mind following rules at work, but when my boss told me to stop impersonating flamingos...
I had to put my foot down.
Breaking :A man was arrested yesterday for impersonating a helium balloon.
A spokesperson for the police said.. We held him for a while and then let him go..
Last two years I spent time impersonating a Federal Agent. Nobody gave me trouble when they saw me, including the police.
Then I turned 8 and decided I wanted to be an astronaut instead.
I must admit, my arch-nemesis did a good job impersonating me...
...Indeed, he was a worthy faux.
In recent news, a man who was charged with impersonating a hay stack
Has been bailed
I found out someone's been impersonating me...
Well two can play at that game.
My mate wears the same jacket when he's impersonating either Matt Damon or Hugh Jackman.
Maybe he's Bourne with it, maybe it's Wolverine.
I’ll admit; my business plan of impersonating and running marathons on behalf of fee paying clients who want prestige without effort, is not going well.
But I’d still give you a run for your money.
After 35 years of carrying a gun and a badge.
I’ve decided it’s time to stop impersonating a police officer.
Why was Sean Connery wearing pointy ears on stage in Las Vegas?
He was impersonating Elvish.
Guy is rolling down the sidewalk in a desk chair
He has a laptop under one arm, a phone under the other. A portable printer on his lap. He has a small wastepaper basket on his head. A swingline stapler in his shirt pocket
Cop spots him and says "what do you think you are doing?"
"Impersonating an office, sir."
Dress for the job
A common quote is dress for the job you want, not the job you have.
I've now been arrested for impersonating a Policeman
I killed a black guy....
I thought I would get arrest for murder, but I got arrest for impersonating a cop.
A policeman arrests a well dressed man in a suit and tie, walking down the Main Street of the city talking on his cell.
The man has a desk strapped to his back, complete with laptop, printer and filing cabinet. He has a dustbin on his head.
“Hold on councillor, I have a policeman trying to arrest me, and I haven’t got a clue why.” He turns and asks “What are the charges?”
“Impersonating an office, Sir”
What penalty did the guy who said "oink oink" to a cop get?
He got 6 months for impersonating a policeofficer
Just saw a news article
about someone impersonating a mime. The mime community is quite upset about this but something tells me they aren't going to speak out about it.
Why was I arrested for only 1 year with a $5,000 fine after killing an unarmed African-American man?
On charges of "impersonating a police officer".
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Here's a collection of the best/worst dad jokes I know.
"When my wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo, I had to put my foot down."
"Why are skeletons always so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin."
"What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? I don't know and I don't care."
"Why can't T rexes clap their hands...
4 jokes are hidden here because they may not be suitable for all ages.
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