A man dies and goes to hell. Once there, he finds that there is a different hell for each country, so he tries to seek out the least painful one.

At the door to German Hell, he is told: "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the German devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."

He does not like the sound of that, so he checks out American Hell, Russia...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Three men go to hell and they’re pissed

“Surely we weren’t that bad?” they ask themselves. “There has to be something we can do to get out of here.”

Satan suddenly appears and says “Oh, but there is! Withstand ten whippings from my trusty whip here and you’re free to go. I’ll even let you pick something to cover your back with”
...

An atheist dies and goes to hell

The devil welcomes him and says:"Let me show you around a little bit." They walk through a nice park with green trees and the devil shows him a huge palace. "This is your house now, here are your keys." The man is happy and thanks the devil. The devil says:"No need to say thank you, everyone get...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Three guys die and go to hell [LONG]

Satan meets them for orientation. He asks the first one "What was your favorite sin in life?" He replies "It would have to be booze, I stayed drunk all the time." So Satan leads him to a door and opens it to reveal a giant room containing acres of every type of alcoholic drink imaginable; beers, ...

Engineer in Hell

An engineer dies and goes to hell. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements.. After a while, they've got air conditioning, flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is a pretty popular guy. One day God calls Sa...

Donald Trump dies and goes to hell

In 50 years, he comes to the devil and says: "I know I'm going to spend an eternity here. I would like to ask you for a favor. I miss my country, I miss the United States. Can I go back to Washington DC for 15 minutes? I will go to the nearest bar, drink some beer and have a little chat with the bar...

An American, an Indian, and a Russian got in Hell and plead to the Devil that they don't belong here. The Devil, bored, makes them an offer: "I will strike you 3 times with my whip, and if you survive, I'll let you go. You can use anything you want as a shield".

The American goes first. He builds a high-tech shield from depleted uranium and composites, and hides behind it. The Devil strikes once - the shield cracks; twice - the shield falls apart; thrice - the American is no more.

Next goes the Indian. He puts himself in some advanced Yoga position ...

An engineer dies and is sent to hell

He's hot and miserable, so he decides to take action. The A/C has been busted for a long time, so he fixes it. Things cool down quickly. The moving walkway motor jammed, so he un-jams it. People can get from place to place more easily. The TV was grainy and unclear, so he fixes the connection to the...

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Superman is flying around the city, feeling horny as hell

He suddenly sees Wonder Woman lying naked, legs apart, on top of a building. He thinks, "this is my chance!" and swoops down, faster than a speeding bullet, fucks her deep and hard and is gone in the blink of an eye. Wonder Woman sits up and says, "What the hell was that!?" The Invisible Man rolls o...

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My child asked me if “hell” was a bad word

I explained that yes, hell was a bad word and that he should never say it.

He then asks “is hello a bad word?” I then have to explain to him how hell and hello are completely separate words with separate meanings.

The next day I get a call from his teacher, demanding to know why he won...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Stoner Joke. Three Men Died and Went to Hell Where They Met the Devil. (Warning! Long one)

Three men died and went to hell where they met the Devil. The Devil told them that they had sinned in life and therefore had to spend the next 666 years in hell to atone for their sins. However, since the Devil wasn't entirely merciless, he would let them choose for themselves how they were going to...

When cashing out at the grocery store it was obvious my cashier was high, slow as hell, and insulting me under their breath.

I still don't know if I like self-checkout.

Two Canadians die and end up in Hell.

The devil decides to pay them a visit, so he walks into their room and sees them talking and laughing. Confused, he asks them why they're happy.

They tell him, "Well, we're so sick of the cold where we're from, and this place is nice and toasty."

The devil, annoyed, storms away and goe...

One day in the future, Donald Trump has a heart-attack and dies. He immediately goes to Hell, where the devil is waiting for him.

"I don't know what to do here," says the devil.

“You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I've got three folks here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll ...

A man goes to Hell

Arriving there, he is greeted by Satan.
„Welcome Buddy! Let me show you around.“

They walk along a sunny beach, the sun is shining, the water is deep blue, everywhere are people laughing and having a good time.

They stop by some groups, have a chat and a drink with them and move alo...

What's black and noisy as hell?

A crow on a drumset.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Three men die and are sent to Hell. Satan punishes them based on their sins

They must all spend 80 years locked in a room with their guilty pleasures in life.
The alchoholic will have all the booze he can drink. The sex addict will have countless beautiful, horny women. And the pot head will have all the weed he can smoke.
The three men face their punishments happil...

An Atheist Dies and Goes to Hell

An atheist dies and goes to hell.

​

The devil receives him and says, "Welcome to hell, my friend. I guess they have told you lots of awful things about this place, but it’s all BS. Relax, take a look around and you’ll see that this is not such a bad place."

Atheist ta...

A man is at the gates to hell...

In front of him are 2 gigantic doors. One is made of twisted red oak, and the other of smooth polished iron.


Sitting between the doors are 2 huge red identical looking demons. One is seated on an enormous ornately carved ivory chair. The other on an identically carved but shining black e...

Bill Clinton and the Pope die on the same day, and due to some administrative foul up, Clinton gets sent to heaven and the Pope gets sent to hell.

The Pope explains the situation to the hell administration, they check their paperwork, and the error is acknowledged. They explain, however, that it will take about 24 hours to make the switch.

The next day, the Pope is called in and the hell administration bids him farewell and he heads for...

The devil is showing the new arrivals around hell

The devil shows them all the different torture devices, they use the crime the people committed on earth to sort them into which punishment they get.

​

They hear screams coming from behind a doorway. The devil opens it and shows them people getting killed over and over. "The...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

An American, a European, and an Asian go to hell.

An american, a European, and an Asian go to hell. They meet the devil and he says ¨You will forever be in hell, but, if the three of your penises combined measure 50 cm or more, you shall receive one more chance, and return to Earth.

They agree, and they measure their penises.

American...

An engineer dies, and by some mistake he is sent to hell.

Satan was unsure of why the engineer was sent down there, but he might as well be of use. He commissioned the engineer to install AC, plumbing, various water features, and many other amenities that really started to turn hell into a pretty decent place.

God, on the other hand, took notice of ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A lawyer dies and goes to hell...

The devil pulls up his file on his computer and sighs “You’ve been a naughty boy haven’t you? Extortion, gambling, sex with prostitutes and even murder!”

The lawyer hangs his head in shame and the devil pats him lightly on the shoulder.

“I’m a fair guy, what I’m going to do is let you...

A banker died. When he arrived at the junction between heaven and hell, God gave him a choice between the two. The banker decided to take a tour.

He toured heaven. It was calm, serene and comfortable. Then he toured hell. There were nightclubs, endless bars, girls all around and loud music. He obviously chose the hell.

When he entered hell, there were fireballs, demons spitting java and not a pickle to eat. He turned to God and asked ...

A gamer dies and goes to hell...

After one week, the devil goes to God:

\- God?! What crazy person have you send me here? He destroyed all the cauldrons, killed all demons, running like crazy everywhere and yelling: "Where is the exit to LEVEL 2!!!"

A sodomizer, an alcoholic, a thief and a drug addict await judgment in Hell...

The gatekeeper of Hell says, "Each of you are here because you let your addiction get the best of you. But I'm giving all of you a second chance, prove me wrong and I will drag you back to Hell!". Just like that the sodomizer, alcoholic, businessman and drug addict are teleported back to Earth.
...

Hell

A wife starts yelling at her husband.
"I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE, PACK YOUR BAGS AND GET OUT."
She continues
"YOURE AN IDIOT, I CANT STAND YOU. GET OUT GET OUT PACK YOUR BAGS AND GET OUT. I NEVER WANNA SEE YOU AGAIN."
Once the husband has packed his bags, he is on his way out, and just as h...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A pastor in church once made eye contact with me while giving a fiery sermon on how masturbators will burn in hell

Reluctantly, I put my penis back in my pants.

A guy dies and is sent to hell (hear me out on this one)

He meets the devil there, who presents to him three doors. He says that he can look into each room behind the doors and choose one to spend eternity in. The guys opens the first door and sees people standing in dirt up to their waists. In the second room he sees people standing in dirt up to their n...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A man dies and goes to hell. Satan tells the man he will need to choose a room from several options.

In the first room, people are being burned in fierce flames.

\- Oh this is not for me, says the man.

In second room everyone is being whipped and beaten horribly with spiked tools.

\- Nah, this is not for me either, sorry.

Satan shows him the last room, and the man sees a...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A man dies and goes to hell

The devil greets him a days “I’m feeling mighty generous, so I’ll let you decide what you’re going to do for the next 1000 years.” After touring him through the torture chamber and lava pits they come to a grotesque man receiving a blowjob from a beautiful young woman. The man says “Oh yeah, now thi...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A man dies and goes to hell.

Once in hell hes greeted by the devil. "While in hell you can choose one of three rooms to be tortured in for all of eternity. You may only choose once." They go to the first room and theres a group of people standing on their heads on a hard wooden floor being whipped by demons. They go to the seco...

Trump, Putin and Merkel arrive in hell

Since Satan is in a good mood and they're VIPs, he offers them a deal:

They're allowed one call to their homecountry on a payphone, but instead of coins, they have to pay by being tortured afterwards.

Merkel goes first and calls for 5 minutes. Satan says: "Although the phonelines are g...

A Tampa man dies and goes to Hell.

A Tampa man dies and goes to hell.

When he gets there, the devil comes over to welcome him. The devil then says, “Sometimes it gets pretty uncomfortable down here.”

The man says, “No problem. I’m from Tampa.”

So the devil goes over to the thermostat, turns the temperature up to ...

What the hell man

A guy in a wheelchair just stole my camouflage jacket

Well he can hide but he can’t run

So a man from Arizona dies and goes to hell.

When he gets there he asks satan for a blanket.

Me in heaven: Damn,this place is nice as hell

God: nice as what?

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Welcome to hell!

One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair he has his first meeting with the devil.


Devil: Why so glum, chum?

Guy: What do you think? I'm in hell.


Devil: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. You a drinkin' ma...

A politician dies. Instead of going straight to heaven or hell, a spirit appears to him.

The spirit tells him that, rather than being judged for his sins, he gets to choose whether he goes to heaven or hell.

The politician replies that of course he wants to go to heaven. The spirit tells him that before he chooses, he has to visit both places so each one will get a fair chance.<...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

There’s a knock on the door of the Hells Angels clubhouse

Big hairy biker goes to answer and there’s a little grey haired old lady standing there.

Old lady: I’d like to join the Hells Angels

Biker (a bit flabbergasted): Jeez, I dunno, what about a hog?

Old lady: Oh, that’s no problem, I just bought a brand new Harley.

Biker: Wel...

An engineer goes to hell...

Upset with the conditions in hell, the engineer decides to do something about it. The engineer adds running water to help keep the fires at down, creates an escalator and elevator system to help deal with all the stairs, adds central cooling to reduce the heat, and always continued to improve on the...

A man dies and goes to hell

A man dies and goes to hell. Once he reaches hell he learns that people go to hell depending on how many people hated them. He knows this because he murdered many people and was voted to be executed. He sees someone next to his apartment and says,"Hi what did you do to deserve being here?" The man s...

People say "Heaven's No!" and "Hell Yeah!" but what is there 'maybe'?

Purghaps.

How do you make holy water?

Boil the hell out of it.

A man named Tucker, dies and goes to hell

There, a demon takes Tucker to a hallway with three doors. The demon says (in a deep demonic voice) “You must choose one room, where you will spend the next thousand years!”

The demon opens the first door. Inside there is a man in a pit of fire, screaming in agony. Tucker says “Nooo no no! De...

No Sir, I cannot "go to Hell"...

Satan still has a restraining order on me...

Ole and Sven go to Hell

Ole and Sven, ignoring the -60 degree windchill warnings, froze to death while ice fishing in northern Minnesota and descend to Hell.

Coming to check on his new arrivals from up North, Satan is surprised to find Ole and Sven enjoying themselves, finally removing coats and hats that they've ...

Three men go to hell

Three men go to hell and the Devil offers them all a second chance on earth as long as they can out smart him. The first man steps up and says "I'm gonna melt this block of cheese and I bet you can't put it back together." The man melts the cheese and the Devil puts his hands over it, turning it bac...

Bush , Queen Elizabeth and Vladimir Putin all died and went to hell.

While there, they saw a red phone and asked what the phone is for. The devil tells them it is for calling back to Earth.

Putin asks to call Russia and talks for 5 minutes. When he is finished the devil informs him that the cost is a million dollars, so Putin writes him a cheque.

Next...

Three guys are at the bottom of God's 100 steps stairs. He tells them that he will say a joke at every step: if someone laughs, this person goes to hell; if someone gets to the top, he goes to heaven.

The first guy laughs at the 10th step, he goes to hell

The second guy loses at the 51st step, he goes to hell

The last guy starts laughing at the 99th step, before God even said the joke, so God asks him why he laughs and the guy answers:I just understood the first joke.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Juan was sent to hell.

In the hell lobby, Juan is greeted by a demon. The demon showed 3 doors that contains the type of punishment Juan will receive. Of course, Juan is given the ability to choose his punishment.

The demon opened the 1st door. Juan saw a man being punished by a whip. Juan said: "No! I do not want ...

So Cerberus, the three-headed gatekeeper of hell...

Are we sure he wasn't just a normal dog with two subwoofers?

European heaven and hell

European heaven is where:

All the soldiers are British,
All the wine is French,
All the cars are German,
All the lovers are Italian,
The weather is Greek,
And everything is organized by the Swiss

European hell is where:

All the soldiers are French,
All the wine...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A Communist Russian and Capitalist American go to hell...

When they reach Hell Satan is waiting for them.

“Okay guys” he says “there’s two options! Either you go to Capitalist Hell, where you can do whatever you wish, but must eat a bucket of shit every day. Or you can go to Communist Hell, were you must eat two buckets of shit, but you can still do...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A football coach noticed that his star tackle, Bubba, had so many women hanging around that he couldn’t possibly handle all of them. So one day he asked, "Bubba, just what the hell is your secret?"

Bubba replies, "Well Coach, whenever I’m about to have sex, I always whip it
out and bang it on the dresser like a hammer. This numbs it and I can screw
'em forever!"

The coach went home early one day, and went to the bedroom. He heard his wife
in the shower. Seeing a window of oppor...

Jack, a renown atheist, dies...

... and to his utter surprise ends up in hell where he's greeted by Satan himself.

Completely shocked he talks to the devil and says: "Welp, I've been wrong all my life and I guess I'm now to pay the price for my lack of faith"

Satan laughs and replies: "Awh it's not so bad down here, ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A man goes to hell and the devil greets him.

He takes him to a hallway which has three different doors and tells the man he'll have to choose one room to spend the rest of eternity in.
So he takes him to the first door and he opens it and sees everyone standing on their heads on wooden floors. The man thought that would be pretty terrible t...

An HR manager was knocked down (tragically) by a bus and was killed. Her soul arrived at the Pearly Gates, where St.Peter welcomed her.

“Before you get settled in” he said, “We have a little problem…you see, we’ve never had a HR manager make it this far before and we’re not really sure what to do with you.”

“Oh, I see,” said the woman, “can’t you just let me in?”

“Well, I’d like to,” said St Peter, “But I have higher o...

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A koala bear and a lizard are sitting in a tree smoking a joint...

The koala bear eats a lot of eucalyptus and is a little bit bigger so his tolerance is pretty good. The lizard however is a lightweight and loses his shit very quickly. He says to the koala bear “I’m gonna need a drink of water.” So he walks down the branch and takes a drink out of the river. All of...

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The Restaurant in Hell

You die, and in hell, you are sat at a restaurant. A small group of glutton demons come out with your food. They bring out the most juicy, delicious looking steak you have either seen, a 2-inch cut, said to have come from the finest of cow in all the multiverse. On the side are roast potatoes, the p...

There are rules in Hell,

People who killed one another, will be submerged by the blood of the victim in hell.

Once death was inspecting hell, he saw Lavrentiy Beria, Marshal of the Soviet Union, standing with blood only to his knees. Death ask," You've killed thousands when you're alive, how come you only have bl...

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It's Hell to be Old

OLD people have problems that you haven't
even considered yet!

A 79-year-old man was requested by his
Doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical
exam.

The doctor gave the man a jar and said,
'Take
this jar home and bring back a semen sample
tomorrow.'

The...

Three men died and ended up in Hell...

They were greeted by a fallen angel who told them, "You can stay here happily for all of eternity... as long as you don't step on a frog." The men all agreed to not step on any frogs and they went on their way.

The first man only lasted a couple of hours before he ended up stepping on a frog....

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

At the breakfast table the next morning the husband put his head in his hands and groaned loudly. “Oh bloody hell, what a party last night, I can’t remember a thing about it. Did I make a prat of myself?”

“You sure did,” replied his wife. “You put your hand up the skirt of your boss’s wife and told your boss to piss off.”

“Shit! What happened?”

“He sacked you.”

“Well, fuck him, the bastard.”

“I did,” replied the wife, “and you’ve got your job back.”

So Bill Gates walks into an Apple store and farts the hell out of life. Everyone looks at him and says dude wtf it stinks.

Bill Gates b like "well its not my problem ya'll dont have windows in here"

&#x200B;

3 presidents were in hell.

Nelson mandela, JFK and Stalin are all in hell.
Nelson Mandela walks up go the devil and says I want to make a call back home. The devil allows him to use the phone. 5 minutes later he hangs up and the devil gives him the bill, Its $100.

Next comes stalin. He makes the sane request and af...

Today, I shocked the hell out of the postman by opening the door completely naked.

I’m not sure what surprised him most: my nudity, or the fact that I know where he lives.

My dyslexia is a little unique. I often end up reading words backwards, without realising, and it annoys the hell out of people. I sit by my bed and pray every single night for it to go away, "maybe he'll fix it", I thought...

After all, God is a man's best friend.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

An American and a Russian died and went to the gates of heaven and hell. They were greeted by an Angel.

The Angel said to them, “Because both of you are sinners, you’re are going to hell. However, you can choose between American hell and Russian hell. In American hell, most people are American and they have to eat a bucket of shit every day. In Russian hell, most people are Russian and they have to ea...

A mechanic dies, and, not being a very religious man, gets sent to hell. While in hell, the mechanic meets Satan, and he is shown the ins and outs of Hell.

While wandering around, the mechanic starts doing the thing he's best at --
fixing stuff. In a matter of weeks, Hell has air conditioning, working TV's
and indoor plumbing, all being maintained and improved by the mechanic.

Seeing this from heaven, God calls Satan over and demands to ha...

Four politicians die in a car accident and they find themselves standing in front of St Peter who says he will give them the tour of heaven and hell and they can decide where they want to stay for all eternity...

Heaven is all people with halo's playing harps on clouds, singing, praying and generally praising God.

Then, a demon appears and takes them down to have a look at hell.

In hell, they meet all their old friends playing golf! They play a round, walk up to the 19th for champagne, fine win...

Donald Trump, Barack Obama, and Bill Clinton die and go to hell.

Donald Trump, Barack Obama, and Bill Clinton die and go to hell.

They are lined up in front of three doors. The first is opened to reveal a swarm of wasps and mosquitoes. Satan's voice booms "Mr Obama you have sinned, and now you must spend all of eternity with these vile creations!" And with...

I like the idea of a individual personal hell

It finally means someone will do something special just for me :)

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Three dead men go to hell at the same time.

There is a white man, a Chinese man, and a Mexican man. Satan tells them that they can only leave hell if he can't do what they ask. The white man asks for the fastest sports car in the world; he goes to into hell. The Chinese man asks for the most advanced computer in the world; he goes into to hel...

A blond girl , brunet girl, and black haired girl die and start their journey up to heaven.

Now to get to heaven these girls have to go up 100 steps. On each step there is a joke. If you laugh at a joke you fall straight to hell.
Now the brunet girl gets to about 25 steps then laughs hysterically at a joke about a dyslexic man.
The black haired girl goes much farther to about step 7...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A waitress walks up to one of her tables in a New York City restaurant and notices that the three Bulgarian businessmen seated there are furiously masturbating. She says, "What the hell do you guys think you are doing!?"

One of the Bulgarian men says, "Can't you see? Ve arrrre all verrry, verrry hoongry."

The waitress makes a stroking motion and says, "So how is whacking-off in the middle of the restaurant going to help that situation??"

One of the other businessmen replies, "The menu say, FIRST COME, ...

A drink in Hell

A man dies and goes to hell, and on his first day the Devil gives him a tour.

The man is paying attention and seeing the sites (torture sites, internet comment sections, etc.) and he gets really hot and thirsty.

Coincidentally, the next stop on the tour is the only place to get a drin...

An EA developer dies and gets do decide if wheather he wants to go to heaven or to hell.

First, he checks out heaven and sees that it's pretty standard stuff, angels, clouds, peace, but nothing really interesting.

Then he checks out hell. Really cool parties going on all over the place, infinite amount of drinks and drugs, beautiful women everywhere.

Obviously, he chooses ...

Last week, a group of Hells Angels bikers were riding South on I-85

Last week, a group of Hells Angels bikers were riding South on I-85 in North Carolina country when they saw a girl about to jump off the Catawba River Bridge.
They stopped.
George, the top biker was a big burly man of 53, gets off his Harley, walks through a group of gawkers, past the Stat...

How the hell do you get “Dick” from “Richard” ?

You ask him politely.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A man dies and goes to Hell.

Satan greets him.

Hey. How's it going?

Not good. I just found out I'm in hell.

I know we have a bad reputation but it's not that bad. It's actually quite fun down here. Did you ever drink when you were alive?

Of course.

Well, Mondays, you can drink as much as you ...

A man dies, and wakes up on a beach.

There is nice weather, hot girls playing beach volleyball, barbeques everywhere, laughter and joy. Suddenly, Satan comes up to him.
"Welcome to hell. Enjoy yourself, have a drink, have a hamburger and check out the area. If you need anything or have a question, feel free to ask me", he says. ...

Communist hell

A lifelong member of the communist party dies and goes to hell. Upon arrival, hes told we can give you a choice. You can go to capitalist hell or Communist hell. Having been a communist his whole life, he decides to see what the capitalist hell would look like. He goes and sees people undergoing ...

“Your mother cooks socks in hell.”

~The Dyslexorcist

If you overdose on drugs you don’t go to Heaven or Hell...

You go to Percatory

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Going to Hell for this one

Hitler and Mussolini came back from the dead and were sitting in a bar in TX, because why not? This drunk redneck hears them making plans of picking up where they left off.

He hears Hitler say, "So the plan is to round up all the Jews in Hollywood, DC, and Israel; get them all together along...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

What do you get when you cross a Hells Angel with a Mormon?

Somebody that comes to your house and tells YOU to fuck off.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Little boy in the bath, mummy walks in and sees him giving his willy a good old tug, mum says, Johnny, what the hell are you doing? He replied.

It's mine and I can wash it as fast as I like.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

George Bush dies and goes to hell

Satan is already waiting for him.

'Well, I don't know what to do. See, you're on my list, but I have no free rooms for you. But you, you definitely have to stay in hell, so I'll have to find a solution. There are a few people here who aren't as bad as you are... I guess I'll let one go and yo...

Civil engineer goes to Hell

A civil engineer dies and goes to Hell by accident. According to policy, all civil engineers go to Heaven but a mistake was made this time. The engineer descends to Hell and he finds the situation miserable. Too much heat, fires, lava, vapor, and everyone is in panic mode. So he goes to have a littl...

There's a special place in hell for people like me

It's called 'The Throne'.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Where the hell do you get the balls to tell your wife she needs therapy?

I can't even tell mine she needs a breath mint.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A drug addict, an alcoholic and a cronic smoker die in a car crash

Three of them face the ultimate judgement. They'd have been sent to hell but turns out they did their share of good in their lives. So they face the last test. The alcoholic is given a bottle of Brandy, the drug addict given the stuff he digs and the smoker given a pack of cigarettes. Each of them a...

During his sermon, he swore he was a servant of God and not a mischievous little demon from Hell

But I knew he was an imp pastor

2 guys go moose hunting for the 1st time

They stop at a gun shop to get all the gear they will need. The clerk helping them out decided to have a little fun with the newbies.


CLERK: Best way to hunt a moose is in one of these female moose costumes. You both get in it, make a moose mating call, when the male moose shows up just...

An IT guy goes to hell

When he gets there the devil begins to explain his everlasting torment. "Down here you will wade in scalding magma, always burning and unable to die. There will be noxious fumes that pour into your lungs, you will always be suffocating but always conscious. You will be whipped and flayed and never r...

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