Get To Work Jokes - 21 Hilarious Get To Work Jokes

Why do riot police like to get to work early?

To beat the crowd.

Charles, a new retiree-greeter at Wal-Mart, just couldn’t seem to get to work on time.

Every day he was 5, 10, 15 minutes late.
But he was a good worker, really tidy, clean-shaven, sharp-minded and a real credit to the company and obviously demonstrating their “Older Person Friendly” policies.

One day the boss called him into the office for a talk.
“Charles, I have to tel...

"Get to work ladies!"

Something that has been said to men more often than women.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man is speeding to get to work on time.

A man is speeding to get to work on time. Once he gets to the bridge he passes every day he sees a cop who has his speed radar gun aimed right at him. Fuck. The cop quickly turns his siren on and pulls the man over.

Cop: "Is there a reason you were speeding today, sir?"
Man: "Yes offi...

When i get to work I immediately go to hide

Good employees are hard to find

How does Frosty the Snowman get to work?

By Icicle.

I have to walk through a cemetery to get to work

This morning as I was walking through I saw someone crouching behind a gravestone. I said, 'Morning.' He said, 'No I'm just doing a poo.'

Take off Your Clothes And Get to Work

A Indian Man runs into his office, wearing only a hat and carrying a briefcase. His boss stops him and says, "What are you doing, man? Do you realize you're naked? Shouldn't this be your day off?"

He calmly explains that he was on a party when suddenly the lights went out. Some voice sa...

How does a LGBT Communist get to work?

On their Bi-Sickle!

How do Egyptians get to work?

They use a new bus!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Chef: "How about you get to work on making the octopus balls (Takoyaki)."

Me: "Sounds good, let's get Kraken"

How did the genital wart get to work?

Pubic transportation

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man wakes up late and has to speed to get to work on time...

He's flying down the highway, doing 90 in a 60. He approaches an overpass and sees a cop above running radar. The man thinks to.m himself, "shit".

Sure enough, lights and sirens and the cop is pulling him over. He officer approaches the car and asks the man, "Sir, do you know why I pulled yo...

When I used to live in the Middle East how did I get to work?

Iran

How does Jack Frost get to work?

By icicles

When people ask me how I get to work, I always say in a $200,000 vehicle

I love the bus

What did the table fan say to his boss when he couldn't get to work on time?

Ah-so-late!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Smiths had no children and decided to use a proxy father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr.Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be here soon."

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. "Good morning madam. You don't know me but I've come to...."
"Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut in.

"Really..?" the photographer asked. "Well, good....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A film director is getting ready early in the morning to start work.

It's 6am. There's a knock at his trailer door. He answers and a crew member tells him that they've been postponing too long and have to get to work asap.

The director knows this but appreciates the reminder. He only has time to get dressed, no brushing his teeth, no eating, nothing else. ...

There was a Pirate Captain who had an interesting way of pillaging ships..

Prowling the edges of dangerous waters where storms and large reefs were common, the Captain and his crew would pick out the most stricken merchant vessels limping out of a storm, then swiftly close in.

 

Once their pirate ship was alongside the merchant vessel however, the ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Doc, you gotta help me!

A man goes to the doctors and says "Doc, you gotta help me!"

The doctor says "What's your problem?"

The guy says "Every morning I wake up with my 'morning flagpole'.. I give the missus a quick one, then go to work. On the way to work I car pool with the next door neighbor's wife who gi...

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