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This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Three guys chatting about what they would call their wife if she a was a bird.

1st Guy: My wife would be a Robin, she is always flitting here there and everywhere, making sure everything is tidy.

2nd Guy: My wife would be a Golden Eagle, always on the hunt for food to feed the family.

3rd Guy: My wife would be a thrush. She's an irritating cunt.

A French sparrow came to my garden....

... to see her English sparrow boyfriend. The are flitting around the garden exploring. โ€œIs that a worm?โ€ Asks the French sparrow. Her boyfriend goes over and pecks it with his beak. โ€œNo, it is quite cold but it still tastes niceโ€.

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

My favorite shaggy dog story to tell when I'm at the bar.

A fish is swimming out in a lake, when he sees a fly flitting around, 3 feet above the water. The fish thinks to himself, "If that fly comes down about 5 inches, I can eat it!", so he sits and waits.

A bear sees the fish watching the fly and thinks to himself, "When that fly comes down a few ...

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