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Grandpa goes to the medical store

An old grandpa goes to a medical store/chemist and druggist and asks the boy at the counter for 5mg Viagra.

The counter boy says, "_Pops, at your age it would take 50mg of dosage to get your thing up to functioning hardness_."

Grandpa replied, "_Oh no son, I don't need to perform in be...

The policeman

A police officer, though scheduled for all-night duty at the station, was relieved of duty early and arrived home four hours ahead of schedule, at 2 in the morning. Not wanting to wake his wife, he undressed in the dark, crept into the bedroom and started to climb into bed.

Just then, his wi...

A teenager walks into a pharmacy in the 70s...

He asks the druggist for a 1 pound, 3 pound, and 5 pound box of chocolate, and asks if he could gift wrap each one of them separately.

The druggist complies, but asks the boy why he wants 3 separate boxes, instead of just one?

The boy replies, “Well, you see. I’ve got a really hot dat...

A man walks into an illegal drug store...

Man: Hey! I'm actually here for some medicine I need for my stomach problems.

Druggist: Well, that's a first. What do you need?

Man: Do you have some Diet Coke?

The Pharmacist and a Thermometer

Upon arriving home a husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife. Tearfully, she explained, "It's the druggist.. He insulted me terribly this morning on the phone. I had to call multiple times before he would even answer the phone."
Immediately, the husband drove downtown to confront the drug...

A woman walks into a drugstore....

She asks the druggist if they have vibrators. The druggist motions with is finger and says... "Come this way". The woman look at him disgustedly and says... "If I could come that way, I wouldn't need the damn vibrator!"

A duck walks into a drugstore, looking for a condom.

The druggist says, "It will be $5. Would you like to pay now, or should I put it on your bill?"

The duck responds, "What kind of duck do you think I am!?!?"

An Excellent Vintage.

A drunk walk into a drugstore and asks for a bottle of mouthwash.

"I’m not selling you that," says the druggist. "You’ll drink it for the alcohol and get sick outside my door!"

"Not true!" insists the drunk. "I have my first date in over a year, and I want to make a good impression."...

At the pharmacist

A guy goes to a pharmacist and asks for a dozen condoms.
The druggist asked " Would you like a paper bag?"
The guy shakes his head and says "Nah, she ain't that ugly."

A man walks into a drug store...

And asks the druggist for two boxes of condoms. The druggist asks "do you need a paper bag with that?" To which the man replies "hell no, she's good looking!"

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So a guy walks into Walgreen's.

He asks the druggist for a bottle of Viagra. Druggist says, "Do you have a prescription?" Guy says, "No, but I have a picture of the wife."

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Bowels no move

An Indian named Chief Bowels lived in a teepee on the reservation. One day he received a letter from the state division of highways that said that they were going to build a freeway and it would go right through where his teepee was located and he would have to move.

He was very upset about ...

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