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Digits Jokes

Want to see all the decimal digits of Pi?

They are {0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9}, and there are no others!

Chuck Norris's password is the last 9 digits of pi.

Chuck Norris can divide by 0.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity twice

Chuck Norris can cross a vector with a scalar

Chuck Norris is so tough he can draw a circle with exactly 100 degrees.

Chuck Norris is so badass he can find value of a variable in an expansion without fac...

finally memorized the digits og Pi up to 10 digits.

0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

But sadly i dont know the order.

I won't stand for people with less than 10 digits on their feet.

I'm lack toes intolerant.

I started memorizing the digits of pi

Then I realized it was irrational.

39 digits of pi accurately calculates the circumference of the universe to the width of a hydrogen atom

Scientists still can’t determine how much is needed for your mother though

Have you heard of Y2K jelly?

It allows you to insert four digits into your date where you could previously only fit two.

I made this up on the spot and I'm really proud of it.

This isn't the best joke, but I'm really proud of how it came out. My sister and I are both in town visiting our parents for the first time in years. I keep dropping bad puns and my sister keeps yelling at me.

Tonight, we were telling stories from our youth, and I told her this one. She was r...

In 1999, in the midst of the Y2K panic, the KY Jelly company announced it was now Y2K compliant:

Known as 'Y2KY Jelly, it now allowed you to put all four digits in your date

If the combination of binary digits were called a bit

Then would the combination of ternary digits be called a tit?

I know the first 1,000,000 digits of pi..

its their order that I’m still foggy on

Figurative digits

When is a 2 literally a 6? When it has metaphor.

Girl can I get your digits?

Jack the Ripper was a quite a pickup artist.

Pandemic dating is weird. Last night I asked a girl at the grocery store for her digits ...

And she wrote down her temperature.

I set my password to be the last 4 digits of pi.

Nobody's ever been able to crack it.

I discriminate against people who lose digits on their feet to frostbite.

I guess you could say I am lactose intolerant.

What did the kitchen knife say to the hand?

Can I get your digits?

Think of a number between 1 and 9. Multiply it by 2, and then subtract the sum of the digits from it. Now close your eyes.

Dark, wasn’t it?

What did the serial killer say at the end of a successful first date?

Let me get them digits.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I started by running my hand across her shoulders and the small of her back. My digits glided over her breasts, touching them very lightly, then proceeded gently, caressing as it went down her side, sliding my paw over her stomach...

...and then down the other side to a point below her waist.

I continued on, gently feeling her hips, first one side and the other.

My hand ran further down the outside of her thighs.

My gentle stroking then started up the inside of her left thigh, stopped and then returned to do...

I saw a snake in the yard today...

It was a real beast measuring 3.14 meters long! I thought to myself that it must be a Pi-thon...

...but then I remembered, snakes don't have digits!

A man walks in through the front door after work

and his wife immediately starts smacking him, left and right across the face, cursing.

"Woah woah woah...what gives?!?" the man says.

The smacking intensifies briefly, and then she let's up.

"I picked up your coat from the dry cleaners earlier today, and found THIS in the pocke...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Not exactly a joke, butthe usually get a great reaction. Caution: not for use with those who lack basic math skills.

Pick a number from 1 to 9, but don't tell me what it is. Multiply that number by 9. If the the result is a two digit number, add the two digits together. Now subtract 5.

Where the letters of the alphabet correspond to the numbers 1 though 26, pick the letter associated with the number you hav...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I can predict your favorite movie with one simple trick..

This math test will determine your favorite movie.
Amazing!
This is pretty damn amazing. Mine turned out to be Gone With The Wind. Thats my favorite movie! I was surprised how this worked.
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Be honest and dont look at the movie list till you have done the math!
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Try this test and ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Cheerios

Two boys are playing in their room when their mothers calls them for breakfast. The younger brother jumps up excited for breakfast when his older brother stops him, "How old are you?"

"I'm nine."

"Right, and I'm twelve. You're almost double digits and I'm almost a teenager, it is time ...

Somethings afoot

My wife asked if she could count the digits on my feet..

Toe-tally , I replied

Actual true story: Met a teenager who had blood poisoning as a kid and had to have the fingers on his left hand amputated below the first joint.

He has promised me he will try the line out: "Girl, can I have your digits? 'Cause I'm missing some of mine."

A man finds a lamp on a beach. He rubs it, and out pops a genie.

“I will give you three wishes,” the genie says. “But be warned: whatever you wish for, your ex will get twice that.”

“I wish for a fabulously large mansion,” the man says.

“Are you sure?” asks the genie. “Your ex will get a mansion twice as large, twice as opulent.”

“I’m sure.” ...

I heard that your mom uses her weight as her phone's pin code.

Guess that's why Apple changed it from four digits to six.

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