UPJOKE
numbernumeral systemhexadecimalbase10rational numbernumericoctalnumeralnumericalnumerical digitroman numeralsintegerquantitativebinary

Why should you never argue with a decimal?

It‘s because they always have a point.












apologies if repost

My friend refuses to believe that working with decimals is easier than working with fractions.

He is missing the point.

I like decimal place jokes.

Jokes about whole numbers just have no point.

People who can't tell the difference between whole numbers and decimals....

....are missing the point.

I don't see why some people use fractions instead of decimals

It's pointless, but anyway you gotta draw the line somewhere or else people will think you're being irrational. But that's beside the point

My son was getting super stressed learning about decimals.

I guess you could say it was getting pretty tenths.

They stopped teaching decimals at the school for blind children

Nobody could see the point.

I don’t understand why some people use fractions instead of decimals

It's pointless!

A student came to me and asked

"Is 200 zeroes a lot ?"


"depends on their position " I said "if they are after a decimal point, no"

"and if they are above pearl Pearl Harbor , then yes"

What’s better decimal jokes or integer ones?

Decimal jokes. Integer jokes just don’t have any point.

What happens when you drop a decimal point in water ?

it floats.

Yesterday, I chose to only use binary.

Yesterday, I decided to stick to binary only, instead of the decimal system.
I went to the grocery store and I saw: "£10." I thought, "wow, that product is 101 times cheaper today!"

Let's memorize the repeated decimal 0.818181..... forever.

You said you would never forget 9/11

Want to see all the decimal digits of Pi?

They are {0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9}, and there are no others!

Why was the fraction skeptics about marrying the decimal?

He was sure he would have to convert.

Why the preference for 8/9 over it's decimal?

Overrated.

Two options for keeping a budget that always has money.

Add a zero or move the decimal point.

I made this up on the spot and I'm really proud of it.

This isn't the best joke, but I'm really proud of how it came out. My sister and I are both in town visiting our parents for the first time in years. I keep dropping bad puns and my sister keeps yelling at me.

Tonight, we were telling stories from our youth, and I told her this one. She was r...

Why can’t software developers distinguish between Halloween and Christmas?

Because OCT 31 == DEC 25

(hint: octal and decimal are numerical bases 8 and 10 respectively, happy holidays!)

There are 10 kinds of people in the world - those who can count in binary,

ternary, quaternary, quinary, senary, septenary, octal, nonary, decimal and hexadecimal, and those who weren't expecting a double-subverted binary joke.

I used to hate maths when i was a kid

But as you get older you realise that decimals have a point

A recurring decimal walked into a bar

And never returned

A number is visiting a letter's house, where the letter is cooking a pi in the oven.

The number says "Decimal of that pi is so delicious. I wanna taste it so bad!"

The letter said "Alphabet you do."

New Conspiracy Theory about 9/11

So, if you convert 9/11 into a decimal, you get 0.8181818181818181818181818181.... going on forever. What's the eighth letter of the alphabet? H. What's the first letter of the alphabet? A. That's right, ladies and germs. The Joker did 9/11.

Everyone likes to laugh at other people's inability with numbers. However, 45% of people consider themselves bad at math, every twentieth member of the population hates decimals, 1 out of 5 people can't do mental arithmetic and 3/10 can't do fractions without a calculator.

Yet only one in a hundred find this funny.

Definitions in construction

*Tender submission* - A game of poker in which the losing hand wins
*Tender sum* - A wild guess carried out to two decimal places
*Successful Tenderer* - A contractor wondering what they left out.
*Architect* - A person who knows very little about a great deal and keeps knowing less and le...

What do librarians call breathalyzers?

The DUI decimal system

There are 10 types of people in this world

1. Those who know binary.
2. Those who know base 3.
3. Those who know base 4.
4. Those who know base 5.
5. Those who know base 6.
6. Those who know base 7.
7. Those who know base 8.
8. Those who know base 9.
9. Those who know decimal.
10. Those who know none of the above.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

TIL that Melvil Dewey, inventor of the Dewey Decimal system for organizing library collections, was known to be a serial sexual harasser.

Someone really should've put him in his place.

What do you get if you leave your math homework outside all night?

Dewy Decimals.

How do they keep track of books at the sausage library?

The Andouille Decimal System

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