UPJOKE
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Why didn't Luke Skywalker want to visit the Death Star?

Because he didn't want death.

(My 5 year old made this joke up and he was very proud of himself. I told him I'd post it here for cheap and easy karma)

Why was there a Covid-19 outbreak on the Death Star?

'Cos the Stormtroopers missed their shots.

Sure, the Death Star was expensive.

But Vader's suit cost him an arm and a leg.

Why would someone need a Death Star?

For Alderaan reasons.

Who's the Death Star's greatest country singer?

Darth Brooks.

Who designed the Death Star?

Galen, erso I'm told.

Why was the Death Star measured in miles?

Because they used Imperial units.

The Difference Between Starkiller Base and The Death Star

Starkiller base doesn't have a reactor core because it is a copyright of the fine bros.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call an Over powered Janitorial Storm Trooper at the Death Star?

A Super Duper Pooper Trooper.

Everyone knows about Darth Vader, but very few people talk about his wife.

Ella wasn’t great at conquering planets but she did make it easier to navigate the Death Star.

Someone snuck aboard the Death Star and stabbed Darth Vader with a lightsaber.

It was a space in Vader.

Why did the droids take so long to complete the Death Star?

Because they had bad motivators...



Star Wars fans will get this one...

What did Mike Tyson say to the Death Star elevator attendant?

"Sith floor pleaths"

What website do you go to in order to find the plans to the Death Star?

Wookie Leaks

The Galactic Empire, after the destruction of the Death Star, has taken to bowling during the interim.

The Empire Strikes Back, they call it.

Han, Luke, Obi Wan and Chewie begin there journey to the Death Star aboard the Falcon...

... immediately Chewbacca begins to emit a low, growling whisper - clearly trying to indicate something to his shipmates

Obi Wan: I can't hear a word he's saying
Luke: Yeah, Han, can't you tell your friend to speak up a bit?

Han: Sorry guys.. thats just how the Wookie mumbles

Did you know that Chewbacca's brother Pannubacca died when Princess Leia's home planet was destroyed?

Pannub, as his friends called him, had never had much luck with the ladies and was horribly shy due to his terribly crooked teeth. After years of loneliness Pannub decided to do something about his problem and flew to Leia's planet, which everyone knows was well known for their excellent orthodontis...

The biggest tragedy in Star Wars is their lack of information on one of their greatest unsung heroes.

I mean, he brought the Rebels the plans for the second Death Star before he died, but that is all we know about Manny Bothans.

I came up with this a few years back.

Yo mommas’ so fat, the Death Star used her for target practice.

With the new Space Force I heard

America was building their very own Death Star...and the rebels are going to pay for it

Darth Vader...

Of all the things that Darth Vader lost when the Death Star blew up, it was the destruction of his George Michael box set that affected him most deeply.

He finds his lack of Faith disturbing.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two Stormtroopers are in a Space fight...

One female one male. the female decides to give the male a blowjob whle he shoots and chases after the rebels. As she unbuckled his pants she says "Is it true what they say about Stormtroopers?". "Yes" he says, as he misses all his shots and they die in the explosion of the Death Star.

Juno and Jupiter Sitting in Space

Jupiter's moons were named after the Roman god's mistresses and this week NASA sent a spacecraft named after his wife, Juno, to observe the planet. If they find evidence that Jupiter has been unfaithful, the next thing NASA will be sending is a Death Star.

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