The Trump administration is like the International Space Station

They're in constant free fall, and they needed Russia's help to get there

Why has no electrician ever gone to the International Space Station?

They don't think it's safe. None of the wiring runs to ground.

What did one space station say to the other?

You know what? I don’t like your attitude.

NASA had a supply of rib eye on the last flight to the international space station to see how meat cooked in space. They called it their most important mission.

Because the steaks were never higher.

They developed a toilet for the space station for two reasons:

Number one, and, of course, number two.

I read a book on the International Space Station.

I couldn’t put it down.

Why are there so many fat astronauts on the International Space Station?

Because the food is out of this world.

Why were cosmonauts on the Russian space station always bumping into things?

Because objects in Mir are closer than they appear.

An astronaut scheduled for a launch to the space station thought the world was starting to get too chaotic, so he brought a computer keyboard with him on his trip

Now everything is back under control.

^^^^^I'm ^^^^^sorry.

In the early days of space exploration, there were two astronauts on a space station orbiting earth

The first astronaut says:
"I want to make some coffee but I can't find the milk"

Second astronaut replies:
"In space, no one can. Here, use cream"

The leaders of Russia, North Korea and the United States fly up to the international space station...

Upon their arrival, they all marvel at the view of the earth from such magnificent heights. They begin to toss around ideas of ways they could all benefit from the ISS.

The Russian leader talks about all of the opportunities to use imaging to spy on people from outerspace. The other leaders ...

What sound did the Chinese space station make as it broke apart?

Bang Ding Ow

Why did the cow jump over the International Space Station?

The decline in our rocketry capability means it couldn't jump over the Moon.

The Chinese have lost control of their space station, Tiangong-1, which is falling out of orbit as it descends toward Earth,..

but, sure, nobody listened to me before, when I pointed out their red flag

Why is there no gang violence on the space station?

Because it is a zero G environment.

How do they tie things down on the space station?

They use astro knots.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My dick used be visible from the Space Station

But NASA told me to stop tweeting dick pics at its astronauts

Why did the Joker go up to the International Space Station?

Some men just want to watch the world turn.

Why do astronauts use Macbooks?

Because you can't open Windows on the International Space Station.

Cannot get milk for my coffee, in space.

Once their Crew Dragon craft made it to safely to space, and they were headed toward the International Space Station, Bob Behnken completed some reports and then decided to have a cup of coffee. Well, a pouch of coffee anyway. Still, it was coffee, and thanks to SpaceX's desire to make space trave...

I punched a hole in my office wall today.

Don't understand why everyone else at the international space station is freaking out.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Heroic Homeless Man

It’s December 2012, and Christmas is fast approaching. The snow is on the trees, gifts are being bought, and the lake in Central Park is frozen over. Children and the stents are skiing on the ice, having a great time. However suddenly, a little girl falls through the ice. Luckily, a nearby homeless ...

Astronauts release a photo of Hurricane Harvey...

Astronauts released a photo of Hurricane Harvey as seen from the the International Space Station. They sent a short message along with the photograph; "Houston, you have a problem."

John was an Astronaut...

John was an astronaut scheduled to fly on his first mission to the International Space Station. The media frenzy surrounding the launch was maddening. Everywhere John went, the media followed him.

He would part the curtains at his home in the morning, and the media was out there peering in, t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A retired astronaut and dabbling writer gets a call from NASA

NASA asks the astronaut to help with the international space station, as he is the only one who knows how to fix the system that needs repairs. The man, a fan of old fashioned writing, requires NASA to let him bring his typewriter on the mission as his one condition to come out of retirement.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Russian Soyuz rocket carrying 3 cosmonauts (Russian, American and British) reaches orbit.

Upon arrival at the International Space Station, they are given the surprise of a lifetime - the station has been completely taken over by aliens. These highly intelligent beings, able to appear like humans when needed, have been using the station to monitor activities on Earth.

As the cosmon...

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