I was checking out at supermarket today when I noticed the man in front of me put only one thing on the conveyor belt...

A box of condoms. Not only did he notice me staring but decided to make super uncomfortable eye contact.

So to lighten the mood I put my bottle of ketchup on the belt and said "looks like we've both bought something to put on our sausages"

No matter how hard I try and buy supermarket conveyor belt dividers...

...the cashier keeps on putting them back.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman checking out at the register of the grocery store puts bacon, milk, frozen peas, butter, and a can of soup on the conveyor belt. The man behind her in line see all this and says: “You must be single.” “Why, yes, I am, how did you know?” she asks.

“Cause you’re the ugliest woman I’ve ever seen in my entire life,” he says.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A clean joke

A soap factory had a problem. They sometimes shipped empty boxes without the bar inside. This challenged their perceived quality with the buyers and distributors. Understanding how important these relationships were, the CEO of the company assembled his top people. Six months and $8 million later, t...

Conveyor Belt

A man was shopping at his local supermarket where he selected a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee, and a 1 lb. package of bacon.

He unloaded his items on the conveyor belt to check out, and the cashier said "You ...

Imagine you're a slug of metal rolling down a conveyor belt. A massive die drops on you and you're stamped into a shiny, perfect coin...

Are you moved and impressed?

A woman is putting her grocery items on the conveyor belt...

A woman is putting her items on the conveyor belt and the clerk sees, a carton of eggs, a gallon of milk, and a head of lettuce. The clerk looks at all of the items and says to the woman, "You must be single." The woman, shocked, says "Yes! How do you know this?" The clerk replies with
"It's beca...

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A woman is in line at the grocery store

As she starts to load her food onto the conveyor belt, a drunk man gets in line behind her. As she finishes emptying her basket he leans over and says to her, "you must be single."

She's determined to ignore him, but as she waits she finds herself looking down at her groceries: milk, eggs, ap...

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Bialy and Bagel Factory

The health inspector goes to make his surprise visit to a bialy and bagel factory for it's annual inspection. There, he see a large, hairy shirtless man picking up bialy dough from a conveyor belt and pressing it into his man boob, living the bialy indentation and putting it back on the conveyor be...

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A woman goes to the grocery store

A woman goes to the grocery store. It's a regular Saturday afternoon. At the end of the shopping she goes to the cashier.

She puts following items on the conveyor belt: pepper, cucumber, salami, ham, cheese and Oreos.

The cashier scanns the items and asks: "madam, are you single?".
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman goes into the grocery store...

She grabs a basket, and fills it with her shopping - a single portion dinner, a bottle of diet soda, a TV Guide, etc. She gets up to the register and puts her items on the conveyor. The young man at the register looks at the woman, looks at her purchases, then looks back at her and says, "Wow...you ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman was at the checkout line at the grocery store...

She started to unload her basket. 6 items were all that she was getting. Some feminine products, some snacks, and some tanning oil. A man, visibly drunk walks up and stands behind her in line. He puts a case of beer and a bottle of whiskey on the conveyor. She notices the man looking at her and tur...

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Man a Gets Job as 'Chief Tester' at a Durex Factory!

A man goes for a job in a Durex factory. The interview goes great and the lucky guy is offered the job immediately. The interviewer asks "would you like to see what you will be doing?" and the man agrees it would be good to get a feel for his new task.

They walk out into a large manufacturing...

The twenty and the one . . .

A well-worn one-dollar bill and a similarly distressed twenty-dollar bill arrived at a Federal Reserve Bank to be retired. As they moved along the conveyor belt to be burned, they strike up a conversation.

The twenty-dollar bill reminisced about its travels all over the country. "I've had...

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