Composers Jokes - 28 Hilarious Composers Jokes

Stallone: I’m making a movie about composers. I’m playing Vivaldi.

VanDamme: I’ll be Mozart.

Schwarzenegger: Stop it guys I’m not saying it.

C-3PO, Robocop, and The Terminator are planning a play about classical music composers

C-3PO says, “I’ll be Mozart”. Robocop says, “I’ll be Beethoven”. The Terminator says, “I’ll be Bach”.

Action Composers

All the action heroes are at Stalone's house when their phones all go off. Their agents give them news about a new action movie focused on the great composers. After the call they are all talking about who they would like to play.

Stalone: I'm not going to be in it if I can't be Mozart....

How do you cook german composers?

Just let Hans simmer for about 2 hours.

Three action movie actors decided to do a movie about classical composers...

Bruce Willis said, "I'll be Beethovan"

Sylvester Stallone replied, "I'll be Mozart"

Arnold Schwarzenegger chimed in, "I'll be Bach"

There was a time where all musicians and composers were broke

It was during the Baroque period.

Composers are such hypocrites

They compose when they are alive and decompose when they are dead!

Stallone, Willis and Schwarzenegger are producing and starring in a period drama about the Great Composers.

Stallone, Willis and Schwarzenegger are producing and starring in a period drama about the Great Composers.
They all agree that Stallone should play the role of Beethoven, but Willis and Schwarzenegger get into an argument about who should play Chopin.
Stallone suggest they toss a coin to de...

Sylvester Stallone, Chuck Norris and Arnold Schwarzenegger are sitting in a bar

Sylvester Stallone says, "Guys, we should make a movie with the three of us, but I'm all out of ideas at the moment, I'm kind of bored with the standard action flicks."

Chuck says, "Guys, I'm bored of doing action movies too and I've got some ideas but you may not like them."

Sylveste...

Apparently Danny Devito is casting a new film about Baroque composers.

Arnold Schwarzenegger will be Bach.

Beethoven and Bach were once composers.

Now they are decomposers.

When Arnold Schwarzenegger was a little boy back in Austria, he and his friends had a game where they would pretend to be famous composers ...

Georg would say "I'll be Handel!”

Franz would say "I'll be Schubert!”

Arnold would say "I'll be Bach!"

What do you call a conflict between composers?

A de*bach*le.

Why were all the 17th century composers poor?

Because they were baroque a f.

Spotify won't let me listen to any Hungarian composers for some reason

I feel so lisztless

Did you hear about the Hollywood cosplay of famous composers?

Arnold was Bach

As Governor of California, Arnold Schwarzenegger had to attend many high society functions. One such function was a fund raiser which featured a symphony orchestra playing a medley of pieces by famous composers.

Arnie, as is well known, has only one preference when it comes to classical composers, but sat patiently during the performance.

There were selections by Bach, Beethoven, Mozart, Tchaikovsky and more.

The Governor began to get quite perturbed when, after over an hour and half, his favo...

Did you hear that they're producing an action movie about a team of crime-fighting composers?

They already approached Arnold Schwarzenegger about playing fellow Austrian Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, but he said "no, I'll be Bach!"

What do sick composers drink?

Tchai *cough* Tea

I've been invited to a fancy dress party at Arnold Schwarzenegger's house. The theme is classical composers.

I'll be Bach.

In his prime Mozart was one of the best composers.

But after his death he became a decomposer.

Did you know they are making an action movie about the great composers?

Arnold Schwarzeneggar says he'll be Bach.

Bruce Willis, Sylvester Stallone, and Arnold Schwarzenegger are all hired to do movies about the big three classical music composers. The director gives them the choice on who they play.

Bruce shrugs and says, "I guess I'll be Beethoven".

Stallone thinks for a minute and says, "Eh, I'll be Mozart then."

Everyone then turns to Arnold who looks down with a sigh, "I'll be Bach".

If classical composers of old were alive and listened to some of the music that's popular today, they'd all complain....

Except Beethoven

Steven Spielberg wants to make a movie about famous composers, so he puts out a casting call.

Gary Oldman walks in first and says, "I played Beethoven in *Immortal Beloved*, so I already have experience playing the part."

Tom Hulce calls in next, "I was Mozart in *Amadeus*, and would love to play him again.

Arnold Schwarzenegger meets with him and says, "I'll be Bach."

Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Steven Seagal decide to make and star in a movie about famous composers...

Bruce: "Okay guys, let's decide which musicians we'd like to portray"

Seagal: "Well, I guess I'll play Beethoven if you guys think that works"

Stallone: "that seems like a good fit. I think I'll be Mozart."

Willis: "Sounds good so far. I'd like to portray Brahms."

*Stall...

So I phoned my friend to ask him why he's been calling me the names of different composers, but he didn't answer...

He hasn't called me Bach yet.

Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger are talking about making a new film together.

Sly: “I wanna show the world that we’re more than just action movie stars. I wanna make a movie about classical music and classical composers. I know you guys love that stuff too. What do you think? Will you help me make a movie about it and show the world how cultured we are?”

Bruce: “I cou...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.