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Collectors Jokes

You know there's no official training for trash collectors?

They just pick things up as they go along

For any collectors out there, I saw an ad in the paper for a WWII French Rifle

The ad read “in good condition. Never fired. Dropped once.”

I've got so many bill collectors coming after me

They call me with Google Meet

Garbage Collector

A father is asked by his friend, "Has your son decided what he wants to be when he grows up?"

"Yes, he wants to be a garbage collector," replied the boy's father.

His friend thought for a moment and responded, "That's a strange ambition to have for a career."

"Well," said the...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I wrote this joke about collectors. tell me what you think.

Q. What do you call someone who collects stamps?

A. A philatelist.

Q. What do you call someone who collects coins?

A. A numismatist.

Q. What do you call someone who collects both?

A. A fucking nerd.

A man crosses the border each morning on a donkey...

...and each day, his donkey is loaded with only bags of straw. When he reaches the bridge marking the border, the tax collectors search his bags to calculate what duty he must pay on his exports. Every day, they find nothing. And yet, in the evening, after their shift has finished and they are in th...

I feel sorry for comic book collectors.

They have so many issues

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Penguin Collector

So, there's this guy. This guy collects penguins. He doesn't collect penguin statues or toys or anything, he collects real, living penguins. Penguins of all sorts, Emperor Penguins, King Penguins, Little Penguins, African Penguins, all the penguins.

Now, these penguins live all over his hous...

I asked the local homeless guy what he thought of the rubbish collectors in this city.

He said, "They leave a lot to be desired."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do record collectors have bad sex lives?

They're always complaining about the 10" they don't have.

What do comic book collectors use in their hair?

Mint conditioner.

I don’t understand why my credit score is so low.

Every time collectors call, they say my payments have been outstanding.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Here's a joke I wrote... maybe it's dumb, but really fun to tell.

So, I went to the Home Depot today and stumbled upon this new device used in the emergency room to re-attach a man's private parts after an accident. And guess what? It's nothing but a staple gun! But, sometimes, they mess up and attach it to the wrong person, and I heard they had to invent ANOTHER ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

January, 1774. Revolution stirs in the English colonies.

January, 1774. Revolution stirs in the English colonies. Just last month a rebel group called the Sons of Liberty caused a ruckus in Boston about tea being taxed too high. Tax collectors tarred and feathered. High anti royalist sentiment. William Cotillion, King George's personal advisor to the colo...

A homeless and one million dollars

(to a homeless)

\--What will you do if you are given one million dollars?

\--Oh, I will pay the collectors.

\--And the rest?

\--And the rest of the collectors will have to wait.

I sold my foot that had the Tic-Tac toe today...

I heard collectors pay more for items in mint condition.

A man was caught in a river current and hanging on to some rocks in order to avoid being carried away.



Nasrudin and a friend noticed him, and the friend went up to him, extended his arm, and said, "Give me your hand so I can help you out."

The man, however, did not cooperate.

Nasrudin then asked the man what he did for a living.

"I collect taxes," the other replied.
...

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