What’s the fastest way to circumcise a redneck?

Kick his sister in the jaw.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My cousin Mordecai circumcises elephants

He says the pay is crap but the tips are big

How do you circumcise the Pope?

Kick the choir boys chin

Q: How do you circumcise a sperm whale?

A: Send down four skin divers.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How do you circumcise Moby Dick?

Send down 4 skin drivers

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I wasn’t allowed in a fraternity in college because I was circumcised.

Apparently you need to be a complete dick.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear about the kid who was born without eyelids? Amazingly, they were able to make a set of eyelids out of his foreskin when he was circumcised! He looks totally normal now...

Except he's just a little cockeyed

Why couldn’t they circumcise Trump?





‘Cause there’s no end to that prick

As a summer job I would work for the circus, my job was to circumcise the elephants...

The pay wasn’t that good, but the tips were HUGE

Why do men get circumcised?

Because no one avoids something that's 20% off.

Doctors who don't circumcise are often seen as inadequate

They just don't cut it

What do you call a circumcised elephant?


How do you circumcised a redneck?

By kicking his sister in the chin.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do Jews get circumcised?

Because Jewish women refuse to touch anything that isn't at least 10% off

My grandfather used to circumcise elephants for a living.

The wages were poor, but the tips were enormous.

A man goes in to have his baby circumcised...

After the procedure, the doctor counts the money and says “Sir, I believe you gave me ten dollars too many.”
The man replies “It’s fine. You keep the tip.”

How do you circumcise a whale?

4 skin divers.
Told to me by my neighbor many years ago, ha ha.

Why are Jewish men circumcised?

Because a Jewish woman wont have anything unless its half off.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I was circumcised they accidentally took a little extra off.

They ended up using it as skin grafts for a pair of twin's eyelids.

Now I'm getting sued by the parents because they're a little cock-eyed.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I really wanted to become a pornstar but I had heard that all the popular ones were circumcised.

I guess I just wasn’t cut out for it.

When I was born I was circumcised.

It hurt so bad, I couldn't walk for a year. In fact, I was so mad at my parents that I didn't talk to them for 9 months.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.