I get really angry when Google Chrome crashes.

It gets me totally on Edge.

Internet Explorer, Google Chrome and Safari walk into a bar. Google Chrome asks for a stiff drink. Safari asks for a heavy drink...

Internet Explorer asks for a frozen drink.

Your mind is like Chrome

13 open tabs, 3 frozen. And you don’t know where the music is coming from

Chrome and Microsoft edge were having an argument when suddenly...

Microsoft edge stopped responding

Microsoft Edge is a big improvement over IE...

It downloads Chrome twice as fast!

A Chrome tab is just like a traumatic event

It hangs in the background, unnecessarily taking over your memory.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Google Chrome's new AdBlock ruined my sex life

There aren't any hot singles near me anymore

I'm going to open my own bar and call it "Chrome"

It will keep your tab open until you have no memory

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Where does Google Chrome for desktop stand politically?

While being PC, I think it's clear that for Chrome **ALT+right** is the way **forward**, while **left** is **backwards**.

But actually, I think they're part of a conspiracy where they **Command+ALT+brackets** to Mac-simize power over how we'll **revisit history**.

I mean, look - they...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Tina and ted

Tina and Ted got into their bed, Said Ted to Tina "It's time for some head." "Head in the bed?" is what Tina said, "Before we're both dead," is what Ted next said.

So Tina did suck and Tina did lick, And into her palm then Tina did spit, She polished his crank like a hitch made of chrome, And...

Girlfriends are similar to Chrome

They use too much of your resources

Next time use chrome

A man goes to his dentist because he feels something wrong in his mouth. The dentist examines him and says, "That new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding. What have you been eating?"


The man replies, "All I can think of is that about four months ago my wife made some a...

you should make sure chrome doesn't save your password on lab computers

i logged you out

prequel nerd

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Incognito mode on google chrome is useless..

Everyone in the library can still see me wanking

No place like home...

Tom had lived in New York City for 30 years now. As he looked out the window of his office suite, he realized it was Christmas Eve.

He had been so absorbed with the company business and without a family of his own, had really not been paying attention to the holidays. As he stared at t...

The number of Firefox users in Bikini Bottom is dwindling...

In the future everything will be Chrome.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Joe wanted to buy a motorbike.

He doesn't have much luck until, one day, he comes across a Harley with a "for sale" sign on it. The bike seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years old. It is shiny and in absolute mint condition. He immediately buys it, and asks the seller how he kept it in such great condition for ...

Why don't we let Google Chrome drive?

Because it crashes all the time.

*Disclaimer - shameless chrome user*

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

The Vaseline Biker

A young man has always dreamed on owning a Harley Davidson. One day he has finally saved up enough money so he goes down to the dealer. After picking out the perfect bike the dealer warns him that if he leaves his Harley in the rain the chrome has a tendency to rust. He tells the young man an old bi...

How come everyone's forgotten about internet explorer?

Because chrome takes up your memory.

Santa goes to his dentist..

... complaining about his dentures wearing out.


"It seems like they're corroding, doc! What am I doing wrong?"


The dentist looked concerned. "Have there been any changes to your diet?"


"As a matter of fact," said Santa, "Mrs Claus has started making a wonderful holla...

I only eat eggs Benedict on a hubcap.

There’s no plate like chrome for the hollandaise.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Buying a motorcycle...

This guy decides to buy a motorcycle. He looks all through the newspapers and online for the best deal and after a little searching he finds this amazing deal! The bike is a little older but it is in perfect condition, no scrapes or dents, the chrome pieces shine like new, and the leather seat looks...

A man and his corroded dental appliance..

A man returned for the third time to the dentist to get his dental appliance replaced due to corrosion.

The dentist asked if he ate a highly acid diet, or was fond of citrus, etc.

The man replied that his wife made an excellent holllandaise sauce that was so good he put it on just abou...

An old Italian man is dying and calls for his son

An old Italian man in Brooklyn is dying. He calls his grandson to his bedside.

"Guido, I wan' you lissina me. I wan' you to take-a my chrome plated 38 revolver so you will always remember me."


"But grandpa, I really don't like guns. How about you leave me your Rolex watch instea...

A man walks into a diner, and orders eggs Benedict with hollandaise sauce, served on a hubcap.

The waiter, perplexed, asks him why. He responds:

“There’s no plates like chrome for the hollandaise...”

Did you hear about the new Christmas restaurant downtown?

They have an eggs Benedict dish that they service on car hub caps - it’s called “there’s no plates like chrome for the hollandaise”

Credit to Colin Mochrie.

A guy goes into a restaurant for breakfast at Christmas time.

After looking over the menu he orders eggs Benedict. When his breakfast arrives, it's served on a big shiny hubcap. He asks the waiter,"Whats with the hubcap?" The waiter sings, "There's no plate like chrome for the hollandaise!"

Felisberto

One day, Felisberto wanted to buy a motorcycle. His choice was the Harley-Davidson. There was a only a problem - the chrome. The seller advised to use Vaseline to protect it whenever it rained. And so it was. Felisberto, whenever he saw rain, he would smear his motorcycle with Vaseline. Thanks to th...

Road Rage

An honest man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy boulevard. Suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him.

He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.

The tailga...

As the result of an accident, a man lost teeth and had to have a partial plate made.

His dentist built a standard dental plate and fitted it into his mouth and it worked just fine.

In three months, the man was back at his dentist. The dentist looked in his mouth, and the plate he had just put in was so deteriorated it was beyond repair.

The dentist was shocked that it ...

A husband forgot his wife's anniversary...

So a husband forgot that today was his anniversary, and naturally, his wife was upset and mad at him. The wife then gave him an ultimatum. "If I dont see something chrome plated that can go 0-100 in less than 5 seconds in the garage by tomorrow morning, the neighbors will see you walking away from t...

Programming takes time. Just remember...

Chrome wasn't built in a day

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

What browser do you use to watch porn?

Bill Gates: "Internet Explorer"

Sundar Pichai: "Google Chrome"

Tim Cook: "Safari"

Jared Fogle: "Tor"

A gentleman orders a spinach omelette at a diner.

He asks his waitress if she had some hollendaise sauce to go along with his omelette, she said "I sure do, and I'll even bring it on our special chrome dishes."

He was confused a bit, but he didn't say anything. A few minutes later he got his omelette and sure enough, it was on a dish made en...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A Bear and A Rabbit (Inspired by Eddie Murphy)(Long and Dirty)

A Bear and A Rabbit are walking through the woods, when they come across a magic lamp in a clearing. Upon further investigation, and only 1 attempt to eat it, they release the genie inside who graciously grants them each 3 wishes.

Bear, who lives in the moment quickly says:

"I wish th...

A man visits a dentist

He has horrible pain in his mouth.

The dentist examines him, and says, "There is extensive damage in here, what is your diet like?"
The man says, "Hollandaise sauce. Morning, noon and night. I eat it on everything."
"Well, the damage seems very extensive, but I think I can fix it. You w...

Did you hear that Google has tied every single one of their programs to their browser?

I guess you could say that *all codes lead to Chrome*.

Dorothy is stuck in Oz

Apparently magical footwear can't solve all of your problems. So she stays put.

Decades go by, and technology advances. Dorothy, realizing that things get boring without witches trying to murder you, gets a laptop.

She installs Internet Explorer, and the connection is terrible. Doroth...

A long-range trucker was returning home for the holidays

He was looking forward to seeing his family. However, the snows of December were coming in, and eventually it was a full blizzard. He decided to pull over and stay overnight in a little town. The next morning, he went to a diner to get breakfast. He saw eggs benidict on the menu. The waiter said it ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A guy wants to buy a new Harley...

A guy wants to buy a new Harley to impress his new girlfriend, (she wants him to impress her parents when he meets them for the first time) so he heads down to the dealership and picks out the one he has been looking at for weeks. The dealer tells him that the chrome is brand new, so to combat rust,...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A biker goes to a Harley shop to purchase a new motorcycle...

...and the salesman catches him browsing the selection of bikes they offer. He focuses on a really nice Harley Davidson with some nice chrome parts. The salesman approaches him and says: "I see you have your eyes on one of our most beautiful machines." "Yeah, this one I wanna buy!". "Excellent choic...

Bad holiday joke

I love Hollandaise sauce, and put it on everything, but the lemon juice in it reeks havoc on my dentures. My dentist said he has just the thing: dentures made of chrome. Because there's no plate like chrome for the hollandaise.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Dishes

Wanting a more adventurous life, Frank decides to buy a Harley Davidson. So he goes to a local Harley dealer to have him informed about the different types.

When he get's to the dealer he immediately spots a beautiful Fat Boy with everything he could ever hoped for, beautiful chrome tailpipes...

A guy goes to his local golf course...

The club pro asks him if he wants to try out one of their experimental new robot caddies...on the house.

"Sure, why not?" the man says.

He returns after playing 18 holes and raves to the club pro about the caddy. The robot gave him swing tips throughout the round and always chose the ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Dishes

A man is about to have dinner with his girlfriend's parents for the first time, and he wants to impress them. He had been thinking about buying a motorcycle for a while, and he sees an ad in the paper for a used one. He goes to look at it and its in beautiful shape. It runs well and the chrome is as...

I just opened up Microsoft Edge...

Now I can download Google Chrome in style.

Time to pun-ish you all!

A rope walked into a bar. The bartender looked at it and said, "Hey! No ropes in here!" So the rope walked out. Once outside, it twisted upon itself a number of times, then rubbed it's short free end until it was just a bunch of fibers without any organization. Upon completion of this, the rope walk...

So a guy goes to his dentist...

...to get some a prosthetic plate fitted. Well, a month or so later he goes back. The new plates just don't feel like they are sitting correctly and feel as if they are a little loose. His dentist takes a look and asks, "Have you been eating anything particularly acidic?"

"Well... my wife doe...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

old old lady walks into an adult store. .(NSFW)

she's really old, like 90+ old, she even shakes so she has to use a walker, as shaky as she was she approached the counter;

the attendant thou surprised that a lady that old would go to a adult store did his job.

attendant: hello, is there anything I can do for you?
old lady: yes, d...

really old joke based off a video game from the 90's

What are the three certainties in life? ( Thank you for spellcheck on google chrome ) 1. death 2. taxes. 3. you'll hear this joke sooner or later