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Choice Of Words Jokes

I'm a Brit and I hate it when I have to correct Americans' choice of words.

It's colour not color.

It's football, not soccer.

It's lift, not elevator.

It's school, not shooting range.

I saw my girlfriend naked for the first time and genuinely loved it. (Nsfw)

Although saying "This was a lot to take in" wasn't the right choice of words.

A poor cowboy needs a horse.

He buys the only horse he could afford, one that has its commands messed up.

"He'll go when you say 'whoa!' and stop when you say 'giddy up!'" instructs the seller.

The cowboy sets off riding the horse, feeling silly for saying 'whoa'. As he rides further, he sees an upcoming cliff. He...

My mom has a rule that no friends are allowed at our house in November because of holidays. (It makes no sense.)

But she has a friend that she decided that she'll let over in November. My mom told her "You're an exception. You can come any time in November." So I said "Very poor choice of words." and her friend started dying of laughter, but I got grounded.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A loose tongued child.

A child was being rather risque at a family gathering, using undesirable language, when an old aunt comes up and makes an excuse for his poor choice of words.
"You shouldnt be saying things like that, what are you like?"
To which the child replies, "A castle, because I've got FUCKING TURRETS...

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