UPJOKE
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In Madré Rossiya, it's illegal to manufacture storage drives with exact capacity of 1000 GigaBytes

Cause the KGB takes identity theft seriously

Two bytes meet. The first byte asks, “Are you ill?”

The second byte replies, “No, just feeling a bit off.”

I started a band called 999 MegaBytes...

We haven't got a gig yet...

Eight bytes walk into a bar...

Eight bytes walk into a bar. The bartender asks, “Can I get you anything?”

“Yeah,” reply the bytes. “Make us a double.”

"My dog ate my homework"

Prof - "Your dog ate your coding assignment?
Me - It took him a couple of bytes.

I just formed a grunge band and named it "1023 Megabytes"

... haven't gotten a gig yet though.

"I'm so sorry, my dog ate my homework." Rolling his eyes, my computer science professor shot back, "Really?! Your dog ate your coding assignment?"

"Well, to be perfectly honest, it did take him a couple bytes."

what do you call a really small computer file full of pastry recipes?

Little bytes

A student never turns in his homework because his dog keeps eating it. After moving to online classes, the teacher thought he finally wouldn’t have an excuse.

Because of the global pandemic, the teacher had to move the assignments online. Thinking of this student, she thought that he surely wouldn’t have an excuse anymore and would finally have to turn an assignment in.

But after the assignment was due and the teacher was done grading, she noticed...

How big is a clown's hard drive?

50 GiggleBytes

Mosquito bit me 8 times.

Mosquito bytes

A sculptor made a beautiful hard drive from mahogany...

but it was all bark and no bytes

How does software eat it's food?

By taking large bytes!

How do you email a sandwich?

In bytes.

*Ba dum tss*

Did you hear about the new Mike Tyson computer?

It has two bytes and no memory

New Computer Viruses

The George Bush Virus - Causes your computer to keep looking for viruses of mass destruction.

The John Kerry Virus - Stores data on both sides of the disk and causes little purple hearts to appear on screen.

The Clinton Virus - Gives you a permanent Hard Drive with NO memory.
...

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