Beyonce Jokes

Today I was approached by Beyonce who had just finished setting up at the studio. She said to me, "Excuse me hon. You haven't seen my phone have you? It's pink with a 'Bubblicious' cover on it."

I said, "No, sorry. Have you tried calling it?"

She said, "No. I put it on silent."

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Feyonce.

And she said to me "Whatever floats your boat"

And i said "No that's **Buoyancy**"

If you liked it then you shoulda put a string on it.

"To the left, to the left."

Pregnant with twins - Beytwice

She already has the biggest hits.

Because women have no rights.

It wasn't an official meeting. We aren't friends. But I was at the concert venue for work and she was performing that night. She must have been there for a sound check or something. I didn't even really know it was her at first. She came up to me and asked if I had seen her phone. It was gold and st... read more

The train had just left a tunnel, the Scotsman and Beyonce were acting as nothing happened, while the Englishman nurses a sore face.

The Englishman is thinking " The Scotsman must have kissed Beyonce and she slapped him, but missed and got me instead"

Beyonce is thinking " The Englishm... read more

Can't see her taking his name, though.

o o O o o o o o o o o O

I could have another you in a minute

Matter fact he'll be here in a minute

It was the who's who of hoo-hoos.

I got 100 problems.

"...You ate all my pringles lady, all my pringles lady."

Because women have no rights.

*Sorry of this is rude/offensive and if its a repost, I just wanted to share.*

My poster of Beyonce.

He says "Beyonce, have you seen my phone anywhere?"

She says "Did you try call it?"

He says "Yeah but it's on silent."

She says "If you like it then you should have put a ring on it."

I replied - I didn't know you could get down like that.

A Beyonce

I'll see myself out

Whatever Beyonce is making, I want that.


Twitter @caredee