UPJOKE
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I was diagnosed with antisocial behaviour disorder, so I joined a support group.

We never meet.

Animal behaviour

So I saw my crazy neighbor talking to her cat. She was looking at it like she thought it understood.

When I got home I told this story to my dog and we both laughed

Why is everyone surprised at Hasbro’s recent behaviour?

They’ve been creating Monopolys for 32 years now.

Bad Behaviour

A general noticed one of his soldiers behaving oddly. The soldier would pick up any piece of paper he found, frown and say, "That's not it, and put it down again. This went on for some time, until the general arranged to have the soldier psychologically tested. The psychologist concluded that the so...

What kind of behaviour could underline a serious problem in your relationship?

When you feel like your partner is always trying to Ctrl+U.

How do parents punish their blind children for bad behaviour?

They rearange the furniture.

Unusual Ornithological Behaviour

The Department of Tourism clean-up crew recently found over 200 dead crows off and along interstate 93 near Boston and there was concern that they may have died from some sort of Covid/Avian Flu.

A Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the pro...

My wife wants to talk to me about my childish behaviour.

Little does she know she can’t enter my pillow fort without the secret password.

What part of the brain regulates elk-like behaviour?

The hypothalamoose.

My dad told me he wouldn’t stand for my violent behaviour anymore

I thought that’s pretty fair as I broke both of his legs yesterday

Zoology: On the feeding behaviour of birds.

I read an article a few years ago about the Massachusetts highway department getting an increased number of complaints about dead crows by the highways.

The state consulted behavioural experts, and performed autopsies of some of the dead birds and determined that they were scavenging by the r...

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What do you call a scientist who investigates early homo sapien societies but excuses their violent behaviour toward Neanderthals and other sub-species of archaic humans?

An anthro-apologist.

Juan, a prison warden, decided a group of sikhs (4 or 5 of them) should be released for good behaviour.

The occasion was mentioned in the newspaper: “Juan to free four, five sikhs”
I’ll be here all week.

Two genius economists were arguing about how incentives motivate changes in behaviour

Chinese joke from the 1990s.

Two genius economists A and B were arguing about how incentives motivate changes in behaviour. They walked past a pile of dog dung, and A said to B:

“I’ll give you 50 million dollars if you eat that pile of dog dung!”

B thought about it, worked out i...

Two young brothers in Rome, aged 12 and 14..

One day, two young brothers in Rome, aged 12 and 14, came home with a 20 and 50 euro note. Their mother asked them where they got all that money from.

"Well, we were standing outside the brothel when a guy left," said the 12-year-old. "We told him that we knew where he had been, so he asked u...

At a party, an old lady was complaining about the behaviour of the youth of today.

'Look at the girl over there.' She complained, 'I don't know what young girls are coming to! She is wearing boys jeans, a boys shirt, and that hair cut is so boyish - you wouldn't know if she was a girl at all, would you?'.

'Well, as it happens I would', came the reply, 'because she is my da...

I'm going to start a foundation dedicated to helping people with obsessive behaviour.

And call it Obsessive Disorders Control.

An inmate in a prison is about to be released for good behaviour.

The prison guard walks into the cell to inform the inmate of the good news.
At first, the inmate speaks to the prison guard and is almost immediately interrupted.
The prison guard interjects, but before he can tell the inmate he is soon to be released for good behaviour, the inmate loudly shou...

A man walks into an old pub in Dublin, takes a seat at the bar and orders 3 pints.

After he is served he takes sips from them in turn and when all 3 glasses are finally empty he orders 3 more. The barkeeper, who has been watching him, has never seen such a weird style of drinking and says to the man: “You know when you leave a beer for too long it goes flat, so they would taste be...

After watching social justice warrior's behaviour on YouTube. TIL: the old saying is true...

War doesn't determine who's on the right, only who's on the left.

As compensation for their appalling behaviour, United Airlines are going to sponsor a lot more community sports and activities

Their first project will be Drag Racing

What's the difference between obsequious behaviour towards someone important in order to gain advantage and John Wayne Gacy wearing a top hat and monocle?

One is sycophancy and the other is a fancy sicko.

(As far as I'm aware this is an original joke that I created and am quite pleased with)

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A couple was invited to a swanky costume party. Unfortunately, the wife came down with a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone.

He being a devoted husband protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need for his good time being spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain and, a...

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a boy was asked to think of three good quotes at school

he went home and asked his mother, she said “a fool and his money are soon parted”

he asked his father, he said “ask and you shall receive”

he asked his grandfather, who served the military, he said, “where the battle rages, there the loyalty of the soldier is proved”

he went ba...

I rung up work this morning..

"I need some time off work." I told the receptionist. "My wife died last night."

"Oh I'm so sorry." She replied. "Please, take as much time off as you need."

"Thank you." I said. "It'll be about eighteen years, with good behaviour."

A joke my granddad once told me.

I always loved this one, my granddad told it to me years ago. Still one of my favourites.



An elderly woman wakes one morning and looks out of her bedroom window. Across the road she sees two men from the local council office slowly making their way up the grassy embankment at the side...

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A mother, frustrated with her young son's unruly behaviour finally snaps and asks in exasperation, "how do you think you're ever going to get into heaven?"

"Oh, that will be easy", says the boy. "I'll just keep running in and out, in and out of the gates until St. Peter says, "for fuck's sake, Kevin - are you coming or going? Make up your mind"".

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A man is jacking off on a plane

There are no other people in his row as the plane is relatively empty. So he's been going at it for a couple of minutes now, but suddenly an air hostess catches him red handed.
"Sir! This is not appropriate behaviour! Please stop this act immediately!"
"No way woman! I'm right about to ejacula...

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The mayor is worried about juvenile crime in the city, so he orders various groups to do something about it. Half a year later, they meet to discuss their results.

"We reached out to local schools and started youth programs to keep children busy and educate them on better behaviour. Our studies show that crime among participants fell by 15% compared to the control group."

"We increased police presence in affected areas to deter unlawful behaviour. Our o...

Two old men are sitting on either end of a park bench...

On one side, the old man is quietly reading his newspaper.

On the other end of the bench, that old man is pantomiming fishing. He takes our an imaginary worm, baits an imaginary hook, casts out with his imaginary rod, and slowly reels in the imaginary line. He then unhooks an imaginary fi...

A king used to be drunk throughout the day, no matter what the time, day, occasion was

Frustrated by his behaviour, the queen left the palace and vowed to never go back.

The king, drunk as usual and absolutely shocked by this news, asked his minister, what caused such extreme move of queen

Minister said, "Your highness"

what was the emo robot diagnosed with?

self destructive behaviour

Putin dies and goes to hell....

Because of good behaviour he is allowed out for a few days and goes to Moscow, where he visits a bar. He orders a shot of vodka and asks:

\- Is Crimea ours?

\> Belongs to us.

\- And Donbas and Kiev?

\>Ours!

\- Perfect. How much is that?

\> Five euro...

A Young Jewish boy kept acting up at school..

One day, the school calls his father and says, "Your son keeps acting up in class, and his behaviour is unacceptable. We'd reccomend placement in another school."

So the father talks to his son and decides he's gonna send him to a private school.

A week later, the private school calls ...

Mans best friend

I was having troubles with my girlfriend.

We were always arguing, usually about my behaviour or my friends circle; mostly about nothing in my eyes.

One day she said why don't we get a dog. Great idea! We got a puppy and we went for a long drive into the country side.

When we got...

A police officer attempts to stop a car for speeding...

.....but the guy gradually increases his speed until he's topping 100 mph. The man eventually realizes he can't escape and finally pulls over. The cop approaches the car and says, "It's been a long day and my shift is almost over, so if you can give me a good excuse for your behaviour, I'll let you ...

Council workers

Two men are doing work for their local council. One digs holes in the ground, the other man follows behind and fills them in.

Spotting this strange behaviour a local approaches them and asks why they’re digging holes just to fill them in again.

One of the men replies, “Oh we’re usually...

Once upon a time there was a person with a parrot

Once upon a time there was a person with a parrot, the parrot was rude and often sweared to get what it wanted. One day, the owner couldn’t take it anymore, and decided to put the parrot in the freezer. The parrot started squawking profanities, until it finally stopped. The owner, in fear, opened th...

A Korean immigrant was beaten up by police after they asked for his name and registration papers during a routine traffic stop.

"I never have received seen such bad behaviour by cops" said Mr Fuuk Yu.

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My uncle gave me some really good advice last night...

Me: “Jim, I dropped my phone onto the kitchen floor yesterday. It seems to be working fine mostly, but it’s a little slower than usual. What should I do ?”

Jim: “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.”

Me: “Also, my wife has barley spoken a word to me lately, but we’ve been having non-stop...

What have good cops and good prisoners in common?

They both get released early for good behaviour.

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Drunk private with a wheelbarrow

Sergeant: So as I understand it, private, yesterday after curfew, you were caught arriving from a night out, piss-drunk, with a fucking wheelbarrow?!

Private: Yes, sir that is correct but I think-

Sergeant: I'm thinking 10 days solitary confinement! This is absolutely unacceptable beha...

I hate anti-vaxxers!

Their behaviour is simply sickening.

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Little Red Riding Hood sets out to go visit her grandmother, who lives in another village

As she's walking on the forest road, she sees the big, bad wolf hiding behind a shrub. She stops and says:

\-My, what big red eyes you have!

The wolf looks at her and leaves without saying a word, disappearing in the dense forest. Little red riding hood continues walking on the same fo...

God vs Satan

In contrast to popular beliefs, Heaven and Hell dont lie above each other, but next to each other.
Because God didnt want people be tempted to cross sides, he came to an agreement with Satan: they would have a wall build and split the bill afterwards.
Ofcourse as you could imagin when the wal...

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Police work must be entertaining as well as dangerous.

Recently, a female police officer arrested Patrick Lawrence, 22 year old white male, fornicating with a pumpkin in the middle of the night. The next day, at the Gwinnett County (GA) courthouse, Lawrence was charged with lewd and lascivious behaviour, public indecency and public intoxication.
...

My neighbours have been married 20 years

Unfortunately, I've heard them have the same argument a lot lately


Him: You're cheating! Don't deny it, I can see through your behaviour!


Her: Well you beat me all the time, and I've had enough!


Maybe they should play something other than Monopoly...

Professor Snape and Eearmus

There was once a terribly misbehaving student at Hogwarts. His name was Eearmus. He wouldn't finish his homework or practice any of his incantations. The teachers were getting really impatient with Eearmus.

One day, Eearmus was extra mischievous and decided to play a prank on professor Snape...

A man was arrested for stealing cat hairs to make whoopee cushions.

This was a criminal offense in Florida. He was brought before a judge who was a notorious cat lover. The jury consisted of only elderly spinsters. The man's lawyer requested for a different judge and jury, but his request was rejected. The court found the man "extremely guilty and a possible dog lov...

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Two doctors in a psychiatric hospital.

Two doctors get assigned to take care of a psychiatric hospital. They get in the main hall and see all the patients imagining they drive cars. However, one of the patients was just staying there like a normal guy, and also looked like he was reluctant to the other guys behaviour. The doctor assume h...

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A Father is driving home with his child in the back seat

The boy looks out the window and, seeing a field full of cows, excitedly says to his father;

“Dad! Look! Moo moos!”

His father looks angrily in the rear view mirror and says

“They’re not called moo moos! They’re cows! Say it properly!”

The boy replies quietly “cows, dad.”...

Some kid just threw a bottle of milk at me

HOW DAIRY! His behaviour was udderly disgusting. It just skimmed my head.

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Hospital humour

A doctor was doing his rounds on the ward and came across a male patient masturbating. He said to the Nurse in charge, surely you shouldn’t be allowing this to happen on the ward, it’s most inappropriate. The nurse replied, he has HSC (high sperm count), he has to do this daily to bring the count do...

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Did you hear about the guy that got arrested for having nun porn?

He got off on good behaviour.

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Morale issues

A furious battle was about to begin and the captain gathered his soldiers and his three lieutenants for a final prep talk.

The first lieutenant step forward and shouted "my name is Will because when I go into battle my will hardens and I want to put the enemy down!"

He receives a cheer...

A piece of rope walks into a bar.

After very inappropriate behaviour, the bartender asks the rope to leave.

The rope leaves and gives itself a makeover by unravelling himself at the top and tying himself into a knot.

It returns the next day and the bartender asks “Aren’t you the same guy yesterday?”

It says: “I’...

Add pressurised gas to orange juice you get orangeade. Add pressurised gas to cherry juice you get cherryade. Add pressurised gas to a man named Declan.

You get a decade. Though I'm hoping to be out on parole after 5 for good behaviour.

Penitent Parrot

A young man named Alan received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary.

Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. Alan tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, pla...

TIL that India is installing 15000 CCTV cameras in Delhi for Obama's visit.

This is ridiculous.
Just because he's black doesn't mean he'll steal anything.... When will the world stop this Racist behaviour ?

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There is a boy who is always in trouble, he is constantly upsetting the other children and damaging the school property. Eventually, a letter is sent home to his parents...

...saying the school has put up with his bad behaviour long enough. This morning, they found him masturbating in class so they have expelled him. The letter continues: “I
suggest you talk to your son about his dirty little habit as soon as possible. Tell him he’ll go blind if he carries on.
Yo...

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So these four nuns are in a car accident and die...

... and are lined up at the pearly gates waiting to talk to St Peter. The first nun gte to the gate and St Peter asks her only one question: "Sister - Have you ever had anything to do with a man's penis?" The first nun replied "well i saw one once, but that's all". St Peter told her to wash her eye...

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Three nuns

Three nuns, of the Immaculate conception nunnery were called in the office of the Chief Priest.

Priest said to them : I heard some rumors about your indecent behaviour with some men. But God is merciful and will forgive you if you come clean. He then asks the first nun to confess. «Father I ...

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[Religion] If you're religious this is not for you. The setup is completely fictional. Please don't get offended.

The catholic church would have you believe that Jesus Christ was one single person while, actually they were a set of twins - Jesus and Christ. It was through this that Jesus came back to life, Christ was crucified and Jesus made a religion by apparently coming back to life.
Christ was a...

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Woman visits the antique store

And find a beautiful wardrobe. She decide to buy, but says, that it is too big and won't fit through her door.

The clerk tells her that they can disassemble it, deliver to her house and then assemble it again. She accept so they do just that.

Next day woman calls to the store explainin...

The class teacher asks students to name an animal that begins with an E.

One boy says: “Elephant.”
Then the teacher asks for an animal that begins with a T.
The same boys says: “Two elephants.”
The teacher sends the boy out of the class for bad behaviour. After that she asks for an animal beginning with M.
The boy shouts from the other side of the door: “Mayb...

A group of wives go on a bus trip

A group of wives go on a bus trip.

It was a rainy day. So, while driving over a bridge, the driver lost control over the bus and the bus fell into the river.

All women died in the accident.

The next day, their husbands came to the bridge to mourn for their dead wives.

Aft...

Every time you get sick, slap yourself in the face until you get better.

After some time, you'll stop getting sick because your body has been trained that this is bad behaviour.

A radio DJ is on air and comes up with a competition

The winner will get £1000 if they can come up with a word, not in the dictionary without checking.

Several listeners call in but unfortunately their responses were already in the dictionary.

Hamish, a Scottish listener, phones in and says "Goan"

The DJ checks the dictionary an...

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A chicken farmer buys a new rooster. . .

And he's assured by his friend who sold it to him that he's the perfect breeder.
Feeling a little sceptical, the farmer still takes the rooster back to his farm. No sooner then putting the rooster is let out of his box then it runs into the barn and starts having sex with every hen it can find....

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Three years ago I mistakenly bought my son a giant conch shell…

I have a son who’s on the spectrum. It’s quite common for people like him to latch onto one specific topic and become an absolute encyclopedia about it. Some people choose trains, some a cartoon. For my son, this was mollusks. Interesting topic I know, but it seemed to be a pretty good deal for us b...

Two doctors are arguing in a hospital corridor.

The first doctor says “I’m telling you, it’s spelled W-U-M-B”

The second replies, angrily “Of course it isn’t, you fool, it’s W-O-U-M-B!”

A senior nurse, with years of experience, appalled by what she’s hearing, hurries over to put a stop to the shouting match in progress.

“Doc...

One of the patients in a mental hospital saved another from a suicide attempt by pulling him out of a bathtub.

After hearing this, the director reviews the rescuer's file and called him into his office.

'Mr James,' says the official, 'your records and your heroic behaviour indicate that you are ready to go home. I'm only sorry that the man you saved later killed himself with a rope around his neck'...

Adam was walking around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely..

..so God asked Adam, “What is bothering you?”

Adam said, “Lord, I don’t have anyone to talk to.”

God said, “Then I will give you a companion, and she will be called a ‘woman’. This person will cook for you and wash your clothes, she will always agree with every decision you make. She...

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Two widows go to the cemetery everyday...

... One of them spends all her time crying by the grave of her late husband. The other one just stands on the gravestone of her respective husband and urinates all over it.
So, the first one found the behaviour of the second one weird, went to her and asked:
"Did you hate him that much that y...

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A dude walks into a bank...

"Hi, I'd like to open a fucking bank account!"

The lady teller is a bit offended and asks the man to calm down.

"What do you mean calm down? I'm fucking calm!"

"Sir, if you don't stop with the offensive language , I will have to call my manager!"

"What the fuck are you ta...

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Box under the bed

When Eamonn and Ruth first got married Eamonn said, *“I am a sex addict and I’m putting a box under the bed to help control my addiction. You must promise never to look in it.”*

In all their 30 years of marriage, Ruth never looked. However, on the afternoon of their 30th anniversary, curiosit...

The Queen gets older...

As she grew older, the Queen became rather flatulent. One day, she was receiving foreign ambassadors when she was unable to stop herself from loudly breaking wind. Immediately, the quick-witted French ambassador stepped forward, made an elegant bow and very gallantly said: “I beg Your Majesty’s apol...

Email from God

God looked at earth and wanted to know what kind of behaviour that was going on. He decided to send an angel down to Earth to check it out.

So he called one of His angels and sent the angel to Earth for a time.

When he returned, he told God, "Yes, it is bad on Earth; 95% are mi...

So, John received a parrot, as a gift.

Now this parrot was the rudest, noisiest, most foul mouthed parrot you can imagine. Every other word out of this parrot's beak was profanity, and strings of filthy insults - absolutely appalling behaviour!

Well, over the course of the next week, John tried speaking to it softy and calmly, pl...

An architect

An architect storms into the CEOs office holding a towel to his bloody nose. "Good God, man, what happened to you!?" the CEO exclaimed.

"Sir, the lead architect on the Legend project just punched me in the face for questioning his designs, which frankly are impossible. Take a look." The ar...

An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman all sit down at a bar and order a beer...

...then three flies happen along, each one landing in the mug of its respective owner. The Englishman is repulsed and orders another. The Irishman gives him a dirty look, obviously finding his fey behaviour offensive, and flicks the fly from his mug, taking a long drink. Then both of them hear screa...

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The Billionaire Kid.

A teacher asks her class, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”

Little Johnny, always the first with his hand up and always the naughtiest says “I wanna be a billionaire Miss”

“I’ll be going to the most expensive clubs, take my best bitch with me, give her a Ferrari, an apartment ...

2 Monocles walk into a bar

The new bartender can tell that they are already well on their way to intoxication but obliges them anyway when they order 2 shots.

As the night goes on they continue to get drunker and drunker and their behaviour becomes obnoxious. From loud arguments to inappropriate comments to women and e...

Three Irish brothers

Three Irish brothers go to the pub every Friday for a pint of Guinness after work. One day one of the brothers informs the other two that he’s been offered a new job in England and it’s too good to pass up. They’re upset but understand and wish him well so long as he goes to the pub every Friday and...

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Dear Diary

Wife's  Diary:    

Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird.  We had made plans to meet at a nice restaurant for dinner.

I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late,      
but he made no comment on it.

Conve...

My brother and I both went to the mall today.

We were both hanging around, having a nice time together. Then suddenly out of a blue, a guy came up to us, holding a lighter in his hand. He looked awfully fishy and he gave us a strange stare.


"Hey, boys. Ya mind if I ask ya a question?"


"What is it?" My brother asked, unper...

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No Swearing

A woman gets a phone call from the school where her twin boys attend, informing her that they have been suspended for swearing and are not allowed to return until they change their behaviour.

The woman is livid. She goes to school, drags them to the car by their ears and sends them to their ...

He saw the frozen chicken

George was taking care of a parrot for his aunt. This parrot was a very nasty parrot. It cussed and screamed and made fun of George, so he took the parrot and put it in the freezer.
The parrot kept screaming and insulting George until finally it stopped.

George thought to himself, "On no! ...

Parker seeks the help of International Rescue for something out of the ordinary...

"You have to help me, Mr. Tracy. It's Lady Penelope. She has gone crazy! "

"Gone crazy, Parker? What do you mean by that?"

"It's her drinking....She cannot restrain herself. Every evening for five months she's been in the bar, drinking heavily, disturbing everybody and being utterly un...

Bus driver on Sesame Street.

So, there is a guy who needs a job. He goes to the employment agency and they tell him the only job they have is as bus driver on Sesame Street. He thinks its a bit weird, but he needs a job. First day driving the bus, he gets to the first stop and two very overweight women get on the bus sweating p...

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During WWII, an Australian, a British and an American P.O.W. are forcibly recruited by a brilliant Nazi scientist to undergo an experimental treatment…

The purpose of the experiment is to create human time-keeping machines. They are each placed in separate rooms and subjected to intense brainwashing. After a week of treatment, the scientist comes to inspect on their progress.

He first looks in on the Australian soldier. Staring blankly ahea...

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call him maestro... or else

many years ago there was an orchestra in omaha whose conductor was notoriously ill tempered. he would fly off the handle at the smallest mistake, yet he would never offer any constructive criticism. he thought he was the greatest, and demanded to be called maestro. but sometimes, he'd give the wrong...

Man with a mission

A guy is standing next to an open manhole cover. While smiling and giggling he points down towards the manhole and keeps repeating Twenty six... Twenty six.. Continuosly.

Curiosity got the better of one drunk passerby who was slightly amused by this behaviour. He moves closer to the dude sta...

Prince William visits the Royal Institute for the insane...

He inspects the facilities and has a cup of tea with the workers, just as his mother would have done. He then asks to speak to a few of the residents. The staff were hesitant to agree to the request, but seeing as he was the chief patron of the institute, they couldn`t say no.

After meeting ...

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Sniffer dog on a plane

A man had just settled into his seat next to the window on the plane when another man sat down in the aisle seat and put his Black Labrador in the middle seat next to the man.

The first man looked very quizzically at the dog and asked why the dog was allowed on the plane.

The second ma...

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Son was causing problems...

He didn't study, was rude to everyone, never listened to anyone. Dad tried various things to get him in line but nothing helped.

One night when dad was meeting with his friends, he asked them for advice. He heard again the things he already tried. Then one of the guys sugested that he should...

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A beautiful woman on the top floor of a 4 storey apartment building trips and falls over her balcony.

The neighbour living in the floor below happened to be outside when he heard her scream. He looked up and saw her coming down and as any good man would do, he caught her in his arms as she dangled over the edge.

"Save me, please!!" She cried.

The man began to pull her up but stopped w...

I knew they weren't fooling around

Little Sameer was failing in maths. His parents tried everything.

Tutors, mentors, flash cards, special learning centres, but nothing helped. As a last resort, someone told them to try a Catholic School.

"Those nuns are tough" they said.

Sameer was soon enrolled at St. Mary's...

Shopping with Wife

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Sainsbury's.
Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.
Yesterday my dear wife received the following le...

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Jim's Birthday Hat

Jim's birthday was coming up, and as much as he enjoyed his birthday, he dreaded the obligations that came with it. Despite his vehement protests, his wife had arranged lunch with the whole family, including his witch of a mother-in-law. But Jim was a good man and said he'd be on his best behaviour....

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[Long]Another joke from my country

Part 1

There was a guy in a small village called 'Amda' and he had a weird fetish of trying to stick his dick in anyone who bends over infront of him.

People in his village started to avoid him once they got to know this fetish of his and that made Amda desperate to stick his dick in ...

The Head Teacher

Once there was this fantastic head teacher, let's call him... Mr Johnson. He had single-handily turned around the fortunes of three failing schools in his city with his tight intelligent financial control, understanding of the school's inherent needs, and great relationships with all staff/pupils....

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Six Letters of the Alphabet

Billy was a boy in kindergarten. At the end of the school day, the teacher gave the class a simple task.

“Ok class, I want you to go home tonight and learn the first six letters of the alphabet.”

So Billy left school determined to learn what the teacher had asked. When he got home, he ...

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