Alternate Universe Jokes - 15 Hilarious Alternate Universe Jokes

Why'd the alternate universe Spider-Man do so well on his driving test?

He's an excellent parallel Parker.

somewhere in a alternate universe

A patron at a restaurant is asking for "new coke" and the waiter is saying "is clear Pepsi ok"?

In an alternate universe, where objects down to the molecular level are sentient...

One day, a cell meets up with another cell. They chat for a bit.

Their chat then comes to a brief halt as another cell chimes in, saying "did you hear what the atoms had to say?"

The cell then says "No, they pretty much make up everything"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Alternate Universe

According to scientists there are an infinite number of alternate universes.
When I'm down I like to think about the opposite me in the opposite universe. He's handsome, rich, and successful. I feel better when I think about him and how small his penis must be.

Scientists have invented a way to send messages to alternate universes...

... they are calling them "parallelograms".

Somewhere in an alternate universe...

A bunch of chickens are stuck at a lame wedding doing the ‘Human Dance.’

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In an alternate universe, the Japanese conquered Rome!

Now I have to read about the "Ancient RAMEN empire" in my history books.

In an alternate universe, Aladdin stumbles upon the magic lamp

He picks it up, rubs it and out pops the genie. In this universe, however, the genie only grants you *one* wish and it’s from three pre-selected items of the genie. Aladdin, who obviously doesn’t know about the original story and therefor have no objections, happily accepts these ridiculous rules....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Meanwhile, in an alternate universe where the Nazi's empire reaches to all four corners of the universe...

They've become a Reichtangle.

In an alternate universe where Trump does morning traffic

“There’s no collision, no obstruction of traffic”

In an alternate universe, Lara Croft works in an abortion clinic...

She is called the Womb Raider

2020 was like...

an alternate universe where we were all living in Florida.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This really isn't a good joke but...

In an alternate universe, Hitler gains power of the whole world (somehow) and he is so full of himself, he changes the official title of a man from mister to the first 3 letters of his name.

In this alternate universe, Hitler doesn't believe in Aryan supremacy but supports LGBT (bear with me)...

A Rabbi falls through a portal one day...

And ends up in an alternate universe, inhabited by a people known as the Trids. They take him in and are friendly, but every day at exactly 3 pm a they all bury their heads in the ground. Eventually the rabbi gets curious enough to ask them why they do that. Their leader replies that sometimes a gia...

Politics in terms of cows

SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The state takes a high portion of the milk they produce to be redistributed.

COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The State takes both of them and you have to get into a bread line for food instead.

FASCISM: You have two cows. The State will kill you ...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.