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Galactic Jokes

Why didn't we call them Galactic Towns instead of...

>!Universities!<

What did the black hole say to the photon passing through its galactic backyard?

“Get bent.”

Darth Vader built an entire Galactic Empire...

Wearing protective gear in sanitary environment.

But it was all destroyed by a whiny brat without a mask who refused to stay home with his aunt and uncle.

"Galactic Central, this is Captain Zod reporting in"

"*Captain Zod, this is Galactic Central. Please make your report.*"

"Galactic Central, we successfully reached Planet Earth and have completed our survey."

"*Captain Zod, understood. What did you find*?"

"Galactic Central, we found a large number of orbital nuclear weapons aroun...

How does a church congregation defend against an attack by Galactic Imperial Stormtroopers?

They use the pew, pew-pew pews.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Saudi Arabia just invested $1 billion in Virgin Galactic...

...1 down, only 71 to go!

A senator, a chancellor, a Sith Lord, and the First Galactic Emperor walk into a restaurant.

The hostess says, “table for one?”

The Galactic Empire, after the destruction of the Death Star, has taken to bowling during the interim.

The Empire Strikes Back, they call it.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Space Tourism

One of the car hire companies was looking at diversification, to be able to better cope in the next pandemic.

They started getting interested in the space tourism market, currently dominated by companies such as Blue Origin, Virgin Galactic and SpaceX. They needed a hook to make them stand o...

What do the Jedi build up in their body when they go running?

Galactic Acid

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a nun in space?

Virgin Galactic

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. As they lay down for the night, the fire dwindling nearby, Holmes said: "Watson, look up and tell me what you see".

Watson said "I see a fantastic panorama of countless of stars".

Holmes: "And what does that tell you?"

Watso...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An alien spaceship lands in a married couple's backyard...

The couple goes out to greet them. After introductions and typical small talk, they discover that these aliens are galactic swingers, and they were looking to do a little swapping.

The couple decided that, since they were representing all of humanity, they would play along.

The wif...

Sentient meat

2 Aliens meeting on their starship after a scan of the solar system:

Are there any lifeforms in that solar system

Well it's difficult to really explain

What do you mean

They're made out of meat.

Meat?

Meat. They're made out of meat.

Meat?

There...

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