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Aftermath Jokes

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February 15th - the Aftermath reminded me of a joke

When I saw a [thread](http://imgur.com/yKGB2Z6) on the aftermath of Valentines Day it reminded me of a joke - goes like this.

Boy walks into a pharmacy and walks over near the condom aisle passing by a few time looking very nervous. The pharmacist, a male, decides to take mercy on him and wal...

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You know, farts are kinda like prostitutes.

You should never trust them, they feel really good while its happening but the aftermath is almost always where you get in trouble.

My uncle wants to publish a cookbook that teaches people how to prepare nutritious and tasty meals using the kinds of meagre rations that are available in the aftermath of a hurricane/earthquake/flood/etc.

I told him it sounds like a recipe for disaster.

What do you have after the hardest class in school?

The aftermath.

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So I told Hitler about 9/11

I told him about the carnage and the aftermath, and how the state of America was changed forever, but he was confused.

So, I told him about the backstory, and how Bin Laden began to plan this in the 90s, but he was still confused.

Then, I told him about the numerous connections and the...

Ever since I retired from being a math teacher, my whole life has been …

… dealing with the aftermath.

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The very first joke I ever came up with (eight years old)

Q: What’s at the bottom of Bass Lake?

A: Bass turds.

......

Now that I’m 52, the aftermath is actually funnier than the joke. I told the neighbor kid, who told his little brother, who told his mother, who told his father, who told my father, who angrily explained to me what a ba...

I passed my Algebra test today but failed my Biology exam.

The aftermath was really difficult.

The aftermath of an Italian affair . . .

For several years, a man was having an affair with an Italian woman. One night, she confided in him that she was pregnant.


Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he promised that he would pay her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child. Furthe...

I got in trouble in Algebra class today and had to stay after class for detention.

I didn't enjoy the aftermath.

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A joke written by the AI, ChatGPT

The sky above the port was the color of a moldy jellyfish, a sickly green that made everyone below feel nauseous. But a group of rebellious clowns, led by the hapless hero Isaac Newton, had a plan to bring some joy to the dreary sky. Using a circus tent and a lot of helium, they intended to lift the...

What happens to a math major when he flunks out of school?

The aftermath

When does Eminem go to English class?

Aftermath

I thought the math exam was bad enough. But when I finished i realised...

I had to deal with the aftermath.

What do mathematicians call retirement?

Aftermath

I hope they never ban algebra...

Think of the aftermath!

My friend really went off the rails after he failed his statistics course

The aftermath was terrible.

I accidentally destroyed my home by subtracting (2*5) from 10.

Nothing was left in the aftermath.

A turtle got mugged by a gang of snails...

In the aftermath the police officer asked the turtle for details.
Trembling, the turtle mutters, "I... I don't know. It all just... happened so fast!"

My friend's dad is a war photographer, but with a twist.

He goes into battlefields after the shooting's stopped and takes pictures of the aftermath.

The newspaper he works for got him a contract to take photos in Iraq. Well, this was just after the war broke out, and he couldn't just fly into the country, not while there was a war. So he flew into...

An old man lay dying under the ceiling fan. . .

An old man lay dying under the ceiling fan, which had the bearing of a military helicopter airily surveying the aftermath of a natural disaster.

Surrounded by his son, his twin daughters and a haggard-looking nurse who looked about ready to end it all if only she could find the bloody switch,...

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Did you hear about the CEO with no ears?

There was a CEO with no ears and he was hiring new employees, the interviews went a little like this:


The first interview went fine for the most part but then came the last question.


CEO: Alright, the jobs requirement is to be very keen to detail. Tell me, what is something you...

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I heard this one a few years ago and just remembered it after some time. I don't know if it's already been posted here or not, and if it has, I am sorry! I've also made some edits to it because, well, I don't have the original at my fingertips right now.

When I was in high school - in 10th or 11th grade I think - our class got two new students about midway through the school year. They were twins - a brother and sister - and they were from China. They'd moved to the U.S. only recently, yet they still had a pretty good education in English and I assu...

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