UPJOKE
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Affixed Jokes

The Roman soldiers surrounded Jesus as he was nearing his last breath atop the large hill, affixed to the cross.

His disciples were at the bottom of the hill along with a large crowd as they wept for Jesus. Suddenly Jesus raised his head and shouted out, “Peter! Peter! Come forth!”

Peter was in disbelief that Jesus would summon him and he knew that he had to fight past the guards to see what Jesus’s mes...

My parents and I walk in to the house and see my sister...

My parents and I walk in to the house and see my sister sitting on the table next to an open jar of pickles.

Her legs are open as if stirrups were holding them up, pickle affixed in the unholiest of holies.

Stunned, we tried to play it off with some small talk.

Sister silent, I ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A 2nd Grade Teacher was Fired Today /DryHumor

A superintendent, school principal, vice principal, and New Jersey Department of Education are touring the elementary school for their annual walkthrough.

The hallways buzz about as they pass classroom after classroom, a living collage of Language Arts lessons, Social Studies, sing songs edut...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The creation of a pussy, improved version.

Each man was a master-of-craft at his trade,


Now by God in his wisdom a task they'd been laid.


See them gathered together, by calling divine


to fashion a vulva of peerless design.


The first man, a butcher of eminent skill


took a hold of his bla...

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