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Abdul Jokes

Abdul the Afghani

Abdul the Afghani is walking through the mountains with his wife in front of him. He meets his imam going in the opposite direction.

"Abdul, have you read the Koran? It says the wife should always walk behind her husband," the imam says.

"When the Koran was written, there were no mine...

Abdul was going through bit of a rough patch in his marriage.

So after work, he decided to pay his Imam a visit.

He said "I have been going through some problems with my wife, she seems like she is always angry at me, what do I do?"

The Imam replied "You should spend more time with your wife, appreciate her role in your life, maybe praise her co...

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Abdul went to a doctor

Abdul: Doctor I have severe pain in my .

Doctor: Where exactly is the pain?

Abdul: Just at the entrance.

Doctor: My dear Abdul, it's a exit. As long as you will keep considering it entrance, pain will be there.

Coffee

The Boss always insisted that only Abdul should serve his coffee, but yesterday, this conversation happened.

Boss: "Abdul, since the last 8 years you have brought me coffee filled to the brim without spilling even a drop. How do you manage that over these stairs?"

Abdul: "S...

Abdul was a school going boy

In math class, the teacher asks him "Abdul, what is 5 times 2?"

Abdul says "10"

"Very good, now tell me what is 4 times 3?"

Abdul says "9"

The teacher says "No, the answer is 12"

"8..."

While visiting India , Donald Trump is invited to tea with Abdul Kalam.

While visiting India , Donald Trump is invited
to tea with Abdul Kalam. He asks Kalam what his leadership philosophy is. He says that, it is to surround himself with intelligent people.
Trump asks how he knows if they're intelligent.
"I do so by asking them the right questions," says ...

Abdul and his friend Mohammed are trying to migrate to australia as skilled workers.

They go to the Australian embassy in Lahore and start filling out the application.

Mohammed goes into an interview room with an embassy officer and they start discussing his work
Experience and whether he qualifies as skilled labor. ‘So what do you do, Mohammed?’ says the embassy worker. ...

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Dave asked Abdul how many partners he'd had.

Abdul started counting and fell asleep.

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Once Abdul's wife had a severe stomach ache..

He tried Google, asked his friends and relatives, but no respite from the pain for his wife. Finally, someone suggested to him a reputed Gastroenterologist, and he called him.

Abdul: "Doctor! Please help my wife. She has a severe stomach ache, and I tried everywhere, and nothing is helping. W...

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A Syrian kid in France.

A Syrian kid and his refugee family move to France. On his first day of school his teacher asks him "what is your name?". To which he politely responds, "My name is Abdul and I am from Syria (Middle-East accent)..She abruptly stops him and corrects him.
"No! From now on you are French and your n...

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Guy giving a lecture, on the paranormal.

Guy: "How many people believe in Ghosts?"

About 60 hands go up.

"How many have seen a ghost.?"

About 15 hands go up.

"How many have of you have spoken to a ghost.?"

3 hands go up.

"How many have had with a ghost?"

One hand goes up, Abdul right at ...

Abdul was aboard his first flight

Abdul to air hostess: hey can you tell me my seat number

AH: it is number 4 in aisle C

Abdul: wow what a coincidence lol

Abdul, the Indian wife beater, hits his wife every night at 7 PM

On the dot.

What do you get when you cryogenically freeze a genetic copy of basketball legend Kareem Abdul Jabbar?

An ice Kareem clone

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A jihadist was preparing himself for his mission, when suddenly he's facing the image of his dearly departed comrad

"Ahmad! How is paradise?"

"Abdul, don't go through with the mission, it is not the paradise we were promised!"

"How is that possible? How could that be? Did you get the 72 virgins?"

"Yes, and that's the problem, Abdul... think about what kind of women dies a virgin."

A first grade class walks in from recess...

The teacher asks Sarah: What did you do doing recess?

Sarah replied: I played in the sandbox.

The teacher says: “That’s good. Go to the blackboard and if you can write ‘sand’ correctly I’ll give you a fresh-baked cookie.

She does and gets a cookie. The teacher asks Morris what h...

What do you get when you cross a talented basketball player, and an untrustworthy royal vizier?

Kareem Abdul-Jafar; although these days I hear he's a magical genie who dabbles in writing Sherlock Holmes novels.

Three ISIS mothers having tea.....

The first says: "My son Ahmed used to play here with the neighbor dog...

The next says: "My boy Abdul did too...I miss him.

The third says. "These kids just blow up way too fast"
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