UPJOKE
sikhismkhalsapunjabturbanreligionhindubuddhistislamgurdwaravaisakhiunited kingdomguru nanakamritsarranjit singhbritish raj

Sikh Jokes

I Am Sikh

Khushwant Singh told a friend:

"Once I was travelling from Mumbai to Singapore. A woman sitting next seat continued looking at me. I understood that this lady had never seen a Sardar before. Midway in the flight when the tea and snacks were served, I struck a conversation with the lady. Her n...

Why was the Sikh man in the hospital?

He wasn't just Sikh, he was turbanally ill.

(I'm sorry)

I'm a Sikh and really tired of hearing "sikh" puns on any post related to Sikhs

I'm sikh of this joke.

What do you call a Sikh man...

What do you call a Sikh man standing on one leg? Balan Singh

What do you call a Sikh man on his day off? Relak Singh

And what do you call a Sikh man who follows Covid-19 guidelines? Soshal Distan Singh!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sikh Joke

Each Friday night after work, Sardar would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a tandoori chicken and some meat kebabs. But, all of his neighbors were strict Catholics ... and since it was Lent, they were forbidden from eating chicken and meat on a Friday.

The delicious aroma from the grilled ...

What do you call a sikh standing on one leg?

Balan-Singh

My Sikh friend was walking backwards

I guess he was reversingh.

"Here comes a Sikh-heating missile!"

I say to my mate Gurinder with a grin, as I throw him his beanie and gloves.

Suddenly I find myself floored, nursing a black eye.

...

It was a pun jab.

Saw a group of Sikh men jamming out to heavy metal the other day

They were definitely Down With The Sikhness

What do you call a religious Indian man that doesn't want to be found?

Hidin' Sikh

How many guys wearing turbans does it take to change a light bulb?

Sikhs.

I misplaced something at the office. A nice man in a turban helped me locate it. I guess it's true what they say.

Sikh and you shall find.

(edit: same man teased me about the pronunciation. It was good natured, but it was still a Sikh burn)

(also a comma)

People that keep posting things about Vaisakhi, can you all stop please?!

I’m Sikh and tired of it.

Did you hear about the turban-wearing rapper?

He was laying down some Sikh beats.

What did the Christian say when he found out about all the corruption in the Church?

*"I think I'm gonna be Sikh."*

What's that feeling you get in your side when you hear a sikh joke?

The punjab

A Hindu, a Christian, A Sikh, an atheist, and a Buddhist walk into a clinic...

One of them is called to see the doctor, he goes in, and after a while leaves the clinic. After that, everyone else was angry because they had not received service from the doctor. They ask the nurse standing outside why this is so, to which she said: "I'm sorry, we only serve the sikh."

Pakistan has shot down 2 Indian Jet fighters.

Using sophisticated Sikh - Heating missiles.

What religion has the best dancers?

No religion beats Sikh moves

Did you see that viral Indian dance video?

They’ve got some Sikh moves!

I tried on a turban for the first time today ...

Made me feel a bit Sikh

What do Indian doctors do

They help Sikh people

What's the most religious number?

Sikhs.

Why are there so many hospitals in the Punjab?

Nearly everyone is Sikh.

What's your favorite game if you wear a turban?

Hide-and-Sikh

Christians only

A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Sikh." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."

Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. "Religion?"
"Buddhism."
“Go to room 18, but be very quiet ...

Bollywood wants to make a movie called India Jones

In it, he Sikhs the Holy Grail

Why did the Indian set his friend's turban on fire?

It was a sikh joke.

Juan, a prison warden, decided a group of sikhs (4 or 5 of them) should be released for good behaviour.

The occasion was mentioned in the newspaper: “Juan to free four, five sikhs”
I’ll be here all week.

A man wakes up one morning to find that he's grown a thick beard and is wearing a turban....

He, being very concerned and disoriented, calls his boss in order to see if he can get the day off.

Man: "Boss, I just woke up with a turban and a long, thick beard. I think I need a day to figure things out."

Boss: " So what are you saying....?"

Man: "I'm calling in Sikh."

How did the people of India get so good at medicine?

They've got much practice thanks to a lot of Sikh people

In some countries it's illegal to wear a turban

There's an old saying: "Sikh and you will be fined"

To those bearded men in turbans who tried to convert me to your religion

You make me Sikh!

After years of going to catholic church I’ve finally decided to seek other points of view on religion...

... After countless hours of study and understanding, I felt an uneasy feeling in my stomach.

Had I made a mistake? Had I crossed a benevolent God?

I had studied Judaism in Israel,

Buddhism in Tibet,

Even to indigenous areas of the globe to to better understand what it...

The disappearance of Joseph Haydn

Dissatisfied with the Christianity of Europe in 1800's, the composer Franz Joseph Haydn turned his eye to the religions of the east, and after much soul searching, he converted to Sikhism late in his life.

It would be the last thing he did.

Official reports say that after his conversi...

I'm a Sikh and tired of being called a Muslim.

We're the 7-ELEVEN guys not the 9/11 guys.

Why do you never want to call a middle eastern man with a turban a Muslim?

Because they are Sikh and tired of it!

I hate it when people stereotype. Just because I'm wearing a turban and have a beard doesn't make me Muslim...

...Makes me Sikh!

I saw a guy with a turban coughing his brains out

I think he might be Sikh

We need more hospitals and doctors in Punjab, India...urgently!

There are a lot of Sikh people out there

I saw two Punjabi guys fighting...

It was a Sikh fight.

I'm going to make a movie about a guy in a turban who turns into a monster at night...

...it'll be called "Hyde & Sikh".

My short Indian friend has started coughing a lot lately

I think he’s a little Sikh

A rule of thumb for finding naked women in the Middle East:

Sikh, and you won't find.

What's Indian Women's favorite movie?

"The Big Sikh".

How did my son win a Turban at school today?

He was the champion of Hide and go Sikh

Obama care is religious discrimination

We shouldn’t try to prevent Americans from being Sikh!

A large Indian family walks into a restaurant

It was a party of Sikhs

3 Religious men walk into a doctors office.

But only one of them was Sikh!

Why is coronavirus so bad in India?

Because there are Sikh people.

I asked a man in a turban why he wasn't fasting

He told me you don't have to fast for Ramadan if you are Sikh.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the Indian pedophile miss work?

He was feeling a little Sikh.

How do you get out of Sunday school?

You tell your mom you're Sikh.

What's a Sikh's favourite kind of joke?

A Nanak Nanak joke.

Did you hear about the new camouflage turban?

It helps you hide and Sikh.

Easter Joke (Long)

A Sikh, a Hindu, and a Buddhist all die and go to heaven. Saint Peter greets them at the gate and tells them, "Well I have good news, and I have bad news. The bad news is you guys backed the wrong horse. Christianity is the one true faith. The good news is that you still have a chance to enter heave...

The news is talking about the prison sentences of nearly half a dozen turban-wearing men who committed some minor felonies

"One to Three for Five Sikhs"

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.