British weather is a bit like Islam

It's sometimes sunni but it is usually shi'ite!

My mom is a sunni, my dad is a shia

I'm sushi.

What do you call an Islamist who publishes propaganda about Sunnis?

A Shiite poster.

What caused the rift between the Sunni and the Shia?

A clerical error

Donald Trump was recently asked "Do you know the difference between Sunni and Shia?"

He replied "I don't know which is which but I loved their song 'I got you babe'."

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Jesus & Moses in a boat

so jesus and moses were rowing a boat fishing for supper and after no action Jesus was getting bored and he was like 'hey moishe, moishe--check it out, you think i can still walk on water? you think i still have it? how much you wanna bet i can still walk on water?' Moses says 'i'll take any bet you...

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A comprehensive observation about common religions and religious practices.

Jainism: You must not disturb shit

Bhuddism: You must become one with the shit.

Taoism: Shit happens

Shintoism: Our ancestors thought of this shit.

Hinduism: Eating meat makes you a shit person.

Paganism: Here's some shit that represents other shit.

Reform J...

A Sunni and a Shia Muslim have a child together

They name her Sushi

What did the recent Sunni convert says about ISIS?

They really scared the Shiite outa me!

What have Muslims and Scottish weather got in common?

They're often either Sunni or Shiite.

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I've dry skin & a friend suggested that I use Shea Butter, but I can't do that

Cuz I'm Sunni.

Why is the weather so nice in Saudi Arabia?

It's always Sunni!

Muslims are a lot like breakfast eggs.

If they aren't Sunni side up, they're probably Shiite.

English Weather

I just read something about weather in England:

The Archbishop of Canterbury and The Royal Commission for Political Correctness announced today that the climate in the UK should no longer be referred to as _'English Weather'._

In order to no longer offend a sizable portion of the UK po...

What do you call a Muslim that only prays during the Summer?

Sunni.

The British weather has just been declared Muslim

A little bit Sunni but mostly Shiite

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