Wholesome Dad Joke

Every day the father would give his son what he called advice as he was leaving the house for work, "Beetroota" and would give him a beetroot to take, for good luck.

The son never liked beetroot. But his father would insist every time. He had said this many times, but every time his father w...

(Wholesome Dark Joke) Everyone knows that there is no God ...

Everyone knows that there is no God, and that after you die you just cease to exist. Sure, you might fool yourself into believing in a religion, but even then, deep down, there's that sliver of fear that there's no life after death, only silence and darkness. Dogs on the other hand, dogs go to heave...

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A sadist, a masochist, a murderer, a necrophile, a zoophile and a pyromaniac are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution.

"Let's have sex with a cat?" asked the zoophile.

"Let's have sex with the cat and then torture it," says the sadist.

"Let's have sex with the cat, torture it and then kill it," shouted the murderer.

"Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it and then have sex with it a...

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A teacher has an activity for the class.

"I want all of you guys to go home and get your parents to tell you a story with a moral at the end of it. You guys will come back tomorrow and share your stories." The children all nod their heads and agree. The next day, the teacher asks all the students to tell their stories. There are funny sto...

Onlyfans but it's a bunch of wholesome Vietnamese guys that you can take home to your parents and bring honor to us all.

It's called: OnlyPhans

Wholesome Prison joke from my uncle’s dad

So there are a group of men serving simultaneous life sentences in prison. They’ve served 20 years together already and over all those years to fill the time they told each other jokes. These jokes they’ve loved so much and were told so many times; that they have been able to tell them by numbers al...

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A woman is having an affair during the day while her husband is at work.

Her 9-year-old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them, and hides in the bedroom closet to watch.The woman's husband also comes home.She puts her lover in the closet, not realizing that the little boy is inthere already.The little boy says, "Dark in here."The man says, "Yes, it is."Boy - "I have a ba...

Dad jokes are so wholesome because ...

they're home-groan!

Wholesome joke

One of the most wonderful things in life is to wake up and enjoy a cuddle with somebody; unless you are in prison.

What did the wholesome beet farmer say to his friend?

I am rooting for you!

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[NSFW] Three men are discussing their sex lives

James said "My sex life is amazing! I have threesomes every day."

Jack said "Lucky you. I'm stuck with twosomes."

They both turn to John expectantly. "So John, how is your sex life?"

John thought for a while, then said "Wholesome, I guess."

What's the plural of days? (wholesome)

daisies



:)

Wholesome and hopefully original

One day, a saddened middle aged man was walking out of a liquor store with 2 bottles of whiskey in each hand, carried by the neck of the bottles.

A younger man noticed the other man's expression and walked up to him, and without a word, placed his own hands underneath the bottles of whiskey ...

Why is Jesus so buff?

He uses Crossfit

A piece of string walks into a bar...(my favorite, wholesome joke)

...and orders a drink. The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind around here.", so the string hangs his head and leaves. The next day he tries again, getting the same treatment. Now, Mr. String is getting pretty thirsty so tries again the next day. The bartender, getting upset, says to the stri...

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Wholesome Sunday joke

A young altar boy is running late for service. To save time, he puts on his robes before getting on his bike and pedaling like mad for the church. In his rush, he doesn't look both ways at an intersection and is struck by oncoming traffic.

The altar boy is thrown from his bike and into a ditc...

Rabbi Schwartz and Father O’Malley were at a diner enjoying lunch

Father O’Malley put down his ham and cheese sandwich and commented, “This sandwich is so good! Kosher dietary restrictions made sense in ancient times, but when are you going to join the modern age and eat delicious, wholesome food like this?

Without missing a beat, Rabbi Schwartz replied, “A...

A doctor, a priest, and a child are on a plane that is crashing down.

There are only two parachutes.

The doctor said "I'm going to have to take one. My work is saving lives and I'm on the verge of a medical discovery." He grabs a bag and jumps out.

The priest looked at the child. "Son. I have lived a wholesome life. I have took the high road and have le...

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It's John the mailman's last day on duty.

John has been a mailman for a very long time and the day has finally come where he will deliver the mail for a one last time.

As per usual he goes to the post office to pick up his bag filled with mail and off he goes on that oh so familiar path one last time.

As he stops by the firs...

Testing makeup on animals is WRONG...

They are cute enough already.




^Just ^thought ^I'd ^share ^this ^wholesome ^joke.

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