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Tightrope Jokes

An 18 y/o boy getting a BJ from and 80 y/o woman and a tightrope walker have the same thought...What is it?

Don't look down!


My Dad broke this one out this morning thought I would share.
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I should really think about becoming a tightrope walker

Even the bank says my balance is outstanding!
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What's the one piece of advice that would benefit both a tightrope walker and a guy getting a b.j. from an 85-year-old woman?

"Don't look down."
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What does someone walking a tightrope have in common with a guy getting a blowjob from a 90 year old woman?

Both guys are thinking “Don’t look down, just don’t look down”.

Tightrope walkers do really dangerous things.

They put their lives on the line!
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What do you call a Czechoslovakian government made of tightropes and skateboards?

A system of Czechs and balances!

Feel free to tell your history teacher, they'll probably laugh.
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Why did the tiger eat the tightrope walker?

It wanted a balanced diet.
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Two tightropes are side by side.

One is made of polyester, the other nylon.

The tightrope walker makes it across the polyester rope with no trouble, but on her way back across the nylon line, the rope gives a little too much, and she falls to the net.

The polyester rope looks over in disappointment. "That was a disg...
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I've decided to become a tightrope walker!

I figured I should give it a try since all my credit card companies say my balance is outstanding!
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the similarity between getting a blow job from an eighty year old woman and walking a tightrope?

In both cases, you really don't want to look down.

Which food killed the tightrope walker?

A falafel.
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One man is walking a tightrope. Another is getting a blow job from a 90 year old lady.

Both have the same thought at the same time. What is it?



Don’t look down.

How are millenials and tightrope walkers alike?

Compromise their net and they will literally die.
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A man and his wife are sitting down to dinner.

A man and his wife are sitting down to dinner.

“Ringling Brothers is coming to town this week,” she said. “The poster says they have a dancing bear. I always wanted to see one of those.”

“Maybe next year,” says the man. “Work’s really busy this week.”

The next night at dinner, t...
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear the one about a guy on a tightrope?

There was this twenty-five year old guy walking a tightrope across a deep river gorge, while half way around the world another twenty-five year old guy was getting a blowjob from a seventy year old woman. At this exact moment both men were thinking the same thing...

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What's a tightrope walker's favourite beverage?

Stabili-tea.
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Long queue at the ATM..

I was queuing for ages earlier at an ATM. The queue wasn't moving and no one was saying anything. I said fuck this I'm going up to see what the fuck is goin on. So there's this clown at the top of the queue at the cash machine with his arms outstretched as if he's on a tightrope swaying from side to...

So my friend told me that any girl he dates has to know how to tightrope on heels, I thought he was joking but guess who he’s dating now

No one
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What job is easiest to do on-line?

Tightrope walking!
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Talking to women is like...

Walking a tightrope over a lion cage.

And the tightrope is on fire.

And the lion cage is on fire.

And the lions are on fire.

Why is there so much fire?

Because fire is dangerous and so are women.
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So one time i joined a Slovakian circus...

I got in with the tightrope walkers. The coach had designed this elaborate, rigorous training program. It was a whole system of Czechs and balances.
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A man looking for work

A man was looking for work. In fact, he was desperate. He heard the circus was in town and so he went and asked the ring master if there was a job for him. The ring master said, "We're lucky you showed up! Our tiger just died and he was a big part of the show. What we need you to do is put on this t...
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