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What's the difference between red and blue thermometers?

The taste.

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What do thermometers wear for underwear?

Kelvin Klein

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I thought I'd finally bagged my dream career making thermometers.

Turns out it was just a temp job.

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What’s the main difference between oral and rectal thermometers?

The taste.

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Just bought one of those infrared thermometers and have been testing it thoroughly.

We’re all fine but the radiator is really sick

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I am over 18

Someone's written an album about thermometers...

I've heard it's been nominated for a Mercury Prize.

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