A guy gives flowers to all of his family. To his wife he gives roses, to his parents he gives orchids, to his daughters he gives daisies.

And to his sons, he gives sunflowers

Roses are red, Violets are blue

Sunflowers are yellow

I bet you were expecting something romantic but no, this us just gardening facts

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman walks into the farmer’s market and says,

“I’d like to buy some tomatoes.”

The clerk says, “I’m sorry ma’am, but we’re all out of tomatoes, and won’t have any for a few days.”
So the woman leaves.

A few hours later, the same woman shows up and says, “I’d like to buy some tomatoes.”

The clerk says, “I apologize miss...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A prostitute has a problem...

There once was a very prolific prostitute. She serviced many a John and a Jane over her career.

Her biggest insecurity was always the way her vagina looked. She had rather large pussy lips (labia minora). Occasionally, she would be rejected by a client because of the way her lady bits looked...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Answer

My fourteen-year-old son and I were lying on our backs on the grass in the park, watching the clouds loiter overhead, when he asked me, “Dad, why are we here?”

And this is what I said:

“I’ve thought a lot about it, son, and I don’t think it’s all that complicated. I think maybe we’re h...

A blind man gets in a cab on his way back from work,

and cracks down his window as it's a nice day. He and the driver make some small talk, when the driver eventually asks,

"Is it true that blind people have a better sense of smell than the rest of us?"

"Of course it is!" the blind man exclaims. "I'll prove it to you."

"Alright,"...

The Daughters Names

One day, a little girl ran up to her Father.

"Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!! Why did you call me Rose?"

The father smiled and picked her up on his knee.

"You see, when you were born, and we brought you home, the first thing that touched your head was a rose petal. So we decided to call y...

George visits an isolated village

As he walks down the street he sees three children playing. He is inspired by their happiness, approaches them and asks for their names. "Sunflower", says the freckle-faced girl. "Sunflower?", asks the man, "Why would that be your name?" - "It is said that when I was born, a sunflower fell on my hea...

How to creep out a mortician

How to creep out a mortician.

1. Go in to pre-plan your funeral.

2. Tell him, "I want my remains scattered over the sunflower fields of Fayetteville."

3. He says, "We can do that. The cost for cremation is..."

4. Say, "Cremation? Who said anything about cremation?"
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A bored man on a train...

A bored man on a train walks up to 3 people sitting next to each other. Deciding to troll them, he says to the first guy, "Hey, what's your favorite flower?" "A rose," the first man says. The troll says, "Oh, we wipe our ass with that flower in my country." He asks the next man the same question."A ...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.