UPJOKE
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What did the bee say to the daffodil?

Hey BUD, when do you open.

What's better than daffodils on your piano?

Tulips on your organ.

For those of you that don't already know, I have been admitted into hospital and they are keeping me in.

I have only gone and poisoned myself. What I thought was a large spring onion turned out to be a daffodil bulb. They said I should be out sometime in the spring.

Last year there was a mix up at my local Chinese restaurant. The chef used Daffodil bulbs instead of onions in the chow mein and four people were hospitalised over the Christmas period.

Luckily they came out beautifully in the spring.

Importance

A bigshot business man had to spend a couple of days in the hospital. He was a royal pain to the nurses because he bossed them around just like he did his employees. None of the hospital staff wanted to have anything to do with him.

The head nurse was the only one who could stand up to him. S...

I planted some daffodils on Aunt Millie's grave. She never liked them, but....

after a while they started to grow on her.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Old People

There was this group of "couple friends" who met regularly and over the years they turned into old people. For years and years they would get together regularly. It was the standard old people get together. The women would gather in the kitchen and talk and the men would sit around in the living ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A prostitute has a problem...

There once was a very prolific prostitute. She serviced many a John and a Jane over her career.

Her biggest insecurity was always the way her vagina looked. She had rather large pussy lips (labia minora). Occasionally, she would be rejected by a client because of the way her lady bits looked...

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