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Scorched Jokes

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It was a long day at the gates of heaven, and St Peter was ready to go home

The final man in line walked up. He was a little man, wearing a tuxedo which looked like it had been scorched, and he was holding a golden baton. The man's appearance was otherwise unremarkable, but for the gigantic, shit eating smile on his face.

"What happened to you, sir?"

"I got ...

A man dies and goes to hell...

He is led to three rooms, where he is told by the devil to pick one for his eternal punishment. The first room contains a man sitting in a flame, seemingly being eternally scorched by the fire. The second room contained a man being viciously beaten and stabbed. The last room contains an ugly, fat ma...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Boris Johnson dies...

His soul arrives in heaven and he is met by St.Peter at the Pearly Gates. Welcome to Heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there's a problem: We seldom see a Conservative here and we're not sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in; I'm a believer," says Johnso...

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