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Tulips Jokes

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my girlfriend says her pussy's like a rose

But I think it looks more like tulips

Whats better than roses on a piano?

tulips on an organ...

You can go anywhere and see tulips

But only Chernobyl has threelips

roses are red, tulips are red, violets are red.

my garden is on fire :(

Why do tulips glow?

Because they come from bulbs.

(This is the only *dad* joke I know.)

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red

The tape around my house is yellow

Where do bees go to learn about pollinating tulips?

PLANT PARENTHOOD

There are three girls, one named Tulip, one named Daisy, and one named Brick.

One day, three girls and their mom are walking down the street. One is named Tulip, one is named Daisy, and one is named Brick. Tulip asks, "Mommy, why am I named Tulip?", "Oh, because a bunch of Tulips fell on you when you were born," Her mom said. "Well, why am I named Daisy?", "Because a bunch of...

I was working on the garden. I asked my wife is she liked my new tulips.

She asked when I got the operation.

How does a flower whistle?

Through its tulips!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What kind of flowers do you get someone that's just had a labiaplasty?

Tulips

A family of moles

A family of moles awakens from hibernation. The father mole pokes his head out of the hole and says "I smell tulips it must be spring". The mother mole pokes her head out of the hole and says " I smell cherry blossoms it must be spring". The baby mole is trying to squeeze between his parents but get...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My girlfriend walked in on me having sex with her vase of flowers the other day…

Turns out that’s not what she meant when she said she wanted to put her tulips around my cock

Which kind of flowers are such excellent talkers?

Tulips. (Because they have two lips.)

What do Dutch folk need for kissing?

Tulips

How do you kiss a girl on valentines day?

You use tulips.

My wife came home with a big bunch of flowers and says where would you like me to plant them.

I said I'll tell you where you can plant your tulips.

One popular feminine symbol of true romance is roses on a piano.

Most masculine ideas of romance include tulips on an organ.

What's more beautiful than a delicate rose placed gracefully upon an elegant grand piano?

Somebody putting tulips on your organ.

How many Dutchmen does it take to change a light bulb?

Usually one, tulips are not planted that deeply in the ground.

What's better than Roses on your Piano?

Tulips on your Organ!

This one is courtesy of my girlfriend, who is a classically trained pianist and organist.

What's better than roses on a piano?

Tulips on my organ


My dad told me this joke when I was 5, I finally understood it 19 years later. Hope it doesn't take you that long

What grows under your nose?

Tulips

What's in Poison Ivy's underpants?

Tulips.

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