How do robots eat guacamole?

With computer chips

What do you call a robots one night stand?

A nut and bolt

What's a Robots favorite animal?

A cowculator.

From my 7 year old.

Robots don't have brothers...

They have tran-sisters.

Why are Democrat robots so bad at dancing?

They were built with bad Al-Gore-rhythms.

My wife said we need to sit down and talk about our future, and I was like 'Yeah gonna be awesome! Flying Cars, Colonies on Mars!, Self fixing robots it's gonna be amazing!!'

Not what she meant, am now single.

What do you call it when robots organize an African themed party?

BotsWanna Party

What do you call a family of Mexican-American robots?

Tex Mechs

What haircut do rastafarian robots have?


The human race could never stand against the robot revolution when it happened.

They kept coming back stronger.

The first wave was weak, so they were killable.

The second edition of the robots was strong but still somewhat bearable.

The third mark was slow, so they could be outran.

The fourth grade was dumb, so they were outsmartable.

But nob...

What is a restaurant for robots called?

Dell taco

A girl is talking to a robot...

A girl is talking to a robot and says something that could be considered offensive towards robots. She says, "Sorry, I'm not trying to be robophobic," and the robot says, "Thanks, but you don't need to be so PC."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

All the sex robots I’ve seen hate cuddling

They just Nut and Bolt

Sometime in the future, robots are going to cancel Mark Zuckerburg

Because he tried to make fun of humans by wearing white face.

My wife told me robots don't wash themselves.

So I put one in the bath and said "that'll shower"

Do female robots have a...


Robots are the most loyal lovers

Their love just can't be bot.

Why don't robots like apples?

They're androids.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Apparently Scientists have created robots to give love and support to people

The first word that came to my head was "RoBlowjob"

Have you heard about the Transformer who turns into a prostate vibrator?

I finally understand what they mean by ***"robots in these guys"***

Why do so many robots live in Africa?

'Cause Botswana.

Even robots need a day off.

When I was a young man in in Army Cadets, we had big ornamental robot that we called ‘old-iron-sides’ with a big brass bugle that would play all the calls to the troops. In the morning it would play ‘reveille’ to wake, ‘mess call’ for meals, ‘drill call’ to assemble in the square, etc. We all got so...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.