An old man was piloting a small plane with his wife and kids aboard as a powerful storm raged.

“Don’t fret so much,” he said to them as they were filled with fear. “If anything should happen to me, I've provided for all of you very generously in my will.”

Once upon a time, there were three kingdoms, all bordering on the same lake.

For centuries, these kingdoms had fought over an island in the middle of that lake.

One day, they decided to have it out, once and for all. The first kingdom was quite rich, and sent an army of 25 knights, each with three squires. The night before the battle, the knights jousted and cavorted ...

"Your obsession with Meatloaf is getting out of hand," raged my wife, "Something needs to be done about it, I think it's best that I leave."

I said, "You took the words right out of my mouth."

The two best racehorses in the country.

There were these two racehorses, Galem and Gollum. They were raised together and had been racing side by side their entire lives. Everyone loved to watch them. They were always faster than the other horses; as a matter of fact, they were the best racehorses in the country.



As good as ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There were three medieval kingdoms on the shores of a lake....

There was an island in the middle of the lake, over which the kingdoms had been fighting for years. Finally, the three kings decided that they would send their knights out to do battle, and the winner would take the island. The night before the battle, the knights and their squires pitched camp and ...

RIP Starbucks

The man getting served in front of me at Starbucks asked for a mocha. "Sorry sir, but we're out of mochas."

The guy was fuming.

"I have a mocha every morning when I come in here!" “This is B.S.” he raged.

"Fine! Just give me a darned latte!" He went and sat down, grumbling....

The Sides' Squires

Not sure if this was posted before, but here goes...

There's a beautiful country somewhere where the land is divided into three parts, and at the center is a lake. All 3 kingdoms want the lake and decide to fight for it.

The first kingdom sends all 100 of its finest knights with all o...

A ship was sailing in the middle of the ocean....

A storm was developing in the distance. As the storm raged, the captain realised the ship was sinking fast.

He called out loud, "Anyone here knows how to pray?"

A man proudly raised his hand and came forward, "Aye Captain, I know how to pray."

The Captain replied, "Great, you ke...

A man is driving through the country side...

The road he was on was cut off by this strange water stream. He is a cautious man so he looked around and spotted a guy looking like a farmer.

"So, how do is this? Can my car go through?”

"Of course, the stream is hardly a couple feet deep!" said the guy.

The man was amazed how ...

Trump gets very sick

So he goes to his doctor who runs a bunch of tests and gives Donald a clean bill of health saying it'll pass soon.

Two weeks later after not getting any better Trump goes back, this time vomiting profusely and has uncontrollable diarrhea. His Doctor runs a bunch of new tests and an MRI. On...

Three bulls were grumbling about the expected arrival of a fourth one.

The first bull raged that he has been on the ranch for twenty years and had twenty cows and he was not about give up a single one to the newcomer. The second bull, with ten cows, insisted that he wasn't going to give up any of his, and the third bull, with five cows, wasn't budging either.
The n...

They Were Alone!

They were alone in the house. It was a cold, dark, stormy night.
The storm had come up quickly and each time the thunder boomed.
He watched her jump.
She looked across the room and admired his strong appearance.
She wished he would take her in his arms, comfort her, protect
her from t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Didn't help myself today when the police pulled me over...

They suspected I was driving with no insurance."Fucking filthy pigs" I raged, "have you got nothing else better to do, like arresting murderers and rapists?""Any more language like that, and you'll be arrested" he snapped."I'm sorry, I said, "It's just the beer talking."

Stop me if you've heard this one before.

Jim was suspicious that his wife had been cheating on him. He took off from work early to see if he could catch her in the act. Driving up to his apartment Jim caught a glimpse through an open window of a strange man walking around in his dining room. Now convinced his wife has been unfaithful, J...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.