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Programming Language Jokes

What's a pirate's favourite programming language?

R

What's an optometrist's favourite programming language?

C#

What's IKEA's favourite programming language?

Assembly

What's a herpetologist's favourite programming language?

Python

What's a Pirate's favorite programming language?

Python.

It's really readable and flexible, and has great scientific packages, so most people are pretty fond of it.

What is the most commonly used computer programming language?

Profanity.

I once appeared in a theatre production about a very popular web programming language

JavaScript?

No, it was entirely improvised.

After replacing their old C++ code with Google's new programming language, Tinder can now automatically detect its users' age

This is because it's a Carbon dating app.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Hey girl, are you an object-oriented programming language?

Because you've got class.

Java is the most misogynistic programming language in existence

It thinks women are objects

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What was Hitler's favorite programming language?

Not C.

What programming language do they use in Star Wars?

JawaScript

Why was the programming language afraid when it entered the arena?

It had enumerable foes.

They said this new programming language was so easy even a mafia enforcer can learn it in a month.

I thought mafiosi was just a random example but then I saw the way it combines the operators "or" and "else".

What programming languages would we use if C didn't exist?

Ans: PASAL, OBOL and BASI

Why did the computer split up with the programming language.

Because 1 or more arguments were invalid!

What do you call a programming language designed for women?

An object oriented programming language.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Programming Language Competition (OC)

The programming languages are in a competition to see who's the best.

Java makes the brackets. In the major bracket, C++ is against C#. Binary is against assembly. C is against Java. Visual Basic is against PHP. Perl is against JavaScript.

And Python is in the lowest bracket, with al...

The Final Battle of Jesus and Satan

It's not well known but the final battle between Jesus and Satan is actually a computer programming battle. Armageddon arrives and the battle begins. Jesus and Satan are both tasked with the most complicated programming task ever given. This is the type of task even Linus Torvalds would declare i...

Master/slave terminology was recently removed from the python programming language so as not to offend anyone.

Looks like PC’s finally won.

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