A machine learning algorithm walks into a bar...

The bartender asks, "What will you have?"

The ML algorithm immediately responds, "What's everyone else having?"

Youtube was taken offline by the courts today for their search algorithm was facilitating paedophelia.

Their lawyers appealed the verdict immediately. But they only got an automated answer that told them to reapply in 30 days.

Algorithm

Word used by programmers when they don't want to explain what they did.

Why is the algorithms lecturer so fat?

Because he always minimises the running time.

What do you call a man obsessed with algorithms?

An Algo-holic.

You know how I know Al Gore invented the Internet?

The whole thing runs on algorithms

What is a caveman's favourite audio compression algorithm?

OGG

Algorithm

A former vice president playing the drums

What do you call a sequence of dance moves made by Al Gore?

An algorithm.

What would you call a song about climate change?

An Algorithm.

A professor is teaching Computer Science 101...

A professor is teaching computer science 101 and gets to the topic of recursion, but after reading his prepared notes, one of his students seems particularly perplexed and questions the teacher.

"I don't understand, you said a recursive algorithm one that calls itself?" The student asks.
<...

If all your friends jumped off a bridge would you follow them?

Machine Learning algorithm: yes.

I coded a program to detect Al Gore’s speech by his cadences.

I used an algorithm.

yo mama so fat

that a recursive algorithm to calculate her mass suffers from a stack overflow error before completion.

Some engineers were arguing about God.

One says, "God was clearly a mechanical engineer. Just look at the structure of the bones, how they're shaped to carry their loads without wasted weight, how the joints interlock to give free movement, how the muscles are optimally placed as actuators with the best leverage."

The second repli...

If Al Gore had a band, it'd be called...

The Algorithms.

I'm sooooooooooo sorry for this. :(

What do you call a musical equation that a former Vice President composes?

An algorithm

(Credit to my girlfriend)

What do you get if you ask a former presidential candidate to write a piece of music about a formula for solving a problem based on a sequence of specified actions?

An algorithm.

Job taken seriously

Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt.

The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist watch, and a Pierre Cardin tie gets out and asks the ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If Al Gore tried his hand as a musician, his album would be called...

**Algorithms.**

Girlfriend thought of this while doing dishes earlier.... I could hear her laughing to herself in the other room for almost 10 minutes.

A programmer is having trouble with a program.....

Stan has trying to make a program that can not only understand humour, but make original jokes.

After a year of neural network testing and months of creating the perfect algorithm, he runs the program for the first time.

Unfortunately all the program comes up with is stale, unfunny jo...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

normally don't like longer jokes but, this is funny

A US Navy cruiser was anchored in Mississippi for a week's shore leave.

The first evening in port, the ship's Captain received the following note from the wife of a very wealthy, influential plantation owner (who also happened to be a very generous political donor). It read:

"Dear Ca...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Just a compilation of 10 corny jokes that still make me chuckle.

1. What was wrong with the wooden car with wooden wheels?
It "wooden" go!

2. Why can't a dick be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot

3. A guy walks into the doctors office with a piece of lettuce hanging out of his ass. The doc takes one look and he says, "It looks like w...

What do you say when Al Gore writes computer code?

He's writing an Algorithm!

A Collection of "How many X does it take to change a lightbulb" Jokes

How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two. One to change the bulb and One to develop an algorithm to change lightbulbs efficiently.

Engineers:
One. One to change the lightbulb.

Electricians:
Three. One to change the lightbulb, one to argue about how ...

I really hope Al Gore was in a band during college

And named it "Algorithm"

One day at the Psychiatric Ward...

A psychiatrist is evaluating three new mental patients. He turns to the first one and asks, "How much is 3 times 3?"

The mental patient thinks and thinks. He racks his brain. Finally, after several minutes, he answers, "128!"

The psychiatrist turns to the second mental patient and asks...

How would you describe Al Gore playing the drums?

Algorithm.

Why is Al Gore bad at dancing?

You can't put passion into an Al Gore Rhythm (algorithm).

Anyone? Anyone?

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