Arthur was having a walk and he saw a procession.

First, he saw two coffins. After that, he saw a man holding a *rotweiller* dog, followed by a really long line, only with men.

When the procession stopped, Arthur went to that man and asked:

\- What happened? Who died?

\- Well, it was my wife! My dog killed her!

\- Seriou...

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A guy sees a huge funeral procession in the center of town...

He sees a huge police escort, followed by 2 hearses, a man walking a German Shepherd and 100 people waking single file behind this parade...

The procession stops for a minute and he goes up to the man and asks? What the hell is going on???

The man quietly answers...

My wife is ...

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A Jewish man was leaving a convenience store with his espresso when he noticed a most unusual Italian funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery.

A black hearse was followed by a second black hearse about 50 feet behind
the first one. Behind the second hearse was a solitary Italian man walking
a dog on a leash. Behind him, a short distance back, were about 200 men
walking in single file.

The Jewish man couldn't stand the curio...

Pit Bull at the Funeral

A guy is walking down the street and sees a massive funeral procession. At the front of the line is a man with a pit bull, then 2 coffins, followed by 200 people. Curious, he asks the man what happened.

"Well," says the man, "My pitbull killed my wife last Thursday, then on Friday, he killed ...

There was a car accident involving a funeral procession, yesterday. One person dead.

Luckily it was a fender-bender and no one was hurt.

Bill and his friends were out for their weekly golf match.

A funeral procession goes by and Bill stops I the middle of his swing, takes off his hat, and bows his head until they have moved on.

"That was pretty moving how you showed respect there Bill", one his buddies says.

"Well. We were married for 25 years!" replied Bill.

Two men are playing golf. One of them is about to take a swing when a funeral procession appears on the road next to the course. He stops mid-swing, takes off his cap, closes his eyes, and bows his head in respect.

His golfing buddy says "That must be the most touching thing I’ve ever seen. You are a very compassionate and kind man."

The man, recovering himself, replies, "Yeah, well we were married 25 years."

I recently attended a funeral where the casket was driven to the cemetery on a practice run before the ceremony and procession.

It was a rehearsal.

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Priest told the congregation this joke today at mass.

A Lutheran and a Catholic are out golfing together near a valley. They are going about their own business when they notice a funeral procession at the bottom of the valley.


The Lutheran states "Oh, a funeral" and pays no more mind to it.


The Catholic, however, takes his hat of...

IKEA founder Ingvar Kamprad has died at 91. His funeral procession will be a winding path that takes about 2 hours with a pause in the middle for refreshments.

We also seem to have an extra casket handle and a handful of screws.

Bill,a pro at the local golf course,and Ray,his longtime friend and caddy,went out golfing.

Bill was getting lined up for the most critical putt of his life.It would mean the course record and TenThousand dollars.When a funeral procession came by,Bill stops what he was doing,takes off his hat,holds it to his chest,and bows his head.

"What the hell is wrong with you,"Ray asks?"This i...

2 men are out on a golf course and the first man is about to tee off.

He lines up his shot, starts his backswing, but just before he he swings a funeral procession drives by on the road beside them. He immediately stops and kneels, and closes his eyes in a display of solemn respect until the procession goes by. Then he gets up and starts to tee off again. But the othe...

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A man saw an unusual funeral procession

At the head of the procession was a man leading a labrador on a leash, following 2 slowly moving hearses. He cannot contain his curiosity and walks alongside the man at the head of the procession to offer his condolences.

"Sorry for your loss, who's in the hearse in front?"

"My wife"...

A wife said to her husband,

"If I die first, I want you to promise me that in the funeral procession, you'll let my mother ride in the first car with you."
"OK, if you insist" he replied, "But it will ruin my day."

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A man is walking along when he sees a funeral procession going by

A man is walking along when he sees a funeral procession going by, the longest procession he's ever seen. It seems to consist of the hearse, followed by a man with a Doberman on a leash, followed by several hundred other men. After watching for a few minutes, he can restrain his curiosity no longe...

A fella is on safari in Africa when he comes across an elephant.

It's lying on the ground in distress. He investigates and finds a thorn in its foot.

He removes it and the elephant happily trots away.
20 years later the man in standing in London watching a circus procession pass by.

When along comes an elephant, as it gets level with him, it stop...

2 guys are in ready to tee off on a par 5 and a funeral procession drives by.

One of the guys takes off his hat and holds it over his heart.

The other guy asks: Did you know that person?

Know her? I was married to her for 30 years.

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Paying Respects

Two construction workers, Bill and Andy, were doing some maintenance on the side of the road when a funeral procession approached. Bill ceased working, laid down his shovel, removed his hardhat and looked on solemnly as the hearse passed by. Andy took notice and said "That's real kind of you Bill,...

One Last Humiliation: The CIA Just Bungled An Attempt To Drop A Piano On Fidel Castro’s Funeral Procession

Luckily, It only cost them a grand.

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A man observes a long funeral procession...

A hearse followed immediately behind a man waking a pit bull. Beyond them also walked a line of nearly 300 men. The observer's curiosity got the best of him and he solemnly approaches the man walking the dog and says, "I'm really sorry to disturb you during this difficult time but I just have to kno...

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A hearse drives past Paddy and his mate who take off their hats out of respect. The hearse is followed by a man with a big scary-looking dog, followed by a procession of several hundred men dressed in black...

"Who's in the coffin?" Paddy asks his mate.

"I hear it's the wife of the fella with the dog." His mate replies.

"Oh yeah? What happened to her?"

"I hear, the dog hates women and mauled her to death." His mate replies.

"Oh yeah?" Paddy runs across the road and grabs the ma...

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A man is standing on a street corner when a funeral procession drives by.

It consisted of 2 hearses, followed by a man with a small dog on a leash and he was followed by a long line of men in single file.

He asked the man with the small dog;

"Whose in the first hearse?"

"My wife," the man replied.

"What happened to her?" he asked.

"Dog k...

Two men are playing golf by an old road...

The two men had played through a few holes when a large funeral procession goes down the road.
The first man takes off his hat and puts it over his chest as the motorcade passes. Afterwards he puts his hat back on.
The second man turns to him and says, “Wow, that was really nice of you!”
T...

A funeral procession pulled into a cemetery....

Several carloads of family members pulled followed in a black truck towing a boat with a coffin in it.

A passerby remarked, "That guy must have been an avid fisherman".

"Oh, he still is." replied a mourner. "He's headed off to the lake as soon as we bury his wife."

Four guys where getting ready to tee off on the 18th hole when a funeral procession started coming down the road...

...one of the men took off his hat and bowed his head. Another said, "Marty, that is the nicest gesture I have ever seen out of you." Marty replies, "It's the least I could do, we where married for 28 years."

A funeral procession drives passed a golf course...

Where three men are golfing. One of the guys stops lining up his shot and holds his hand over his heart. The others exclaim, "Roger, that's really kind of you to do that"!

Roger replies, "It's the least I could do. I was married to her for 40 years".

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Funeral procession

Disclaimer: Not my own... I apologize if it's been posted here before.

While going for his morning coffee one day, George notices two hearses driving down the road, followed by a man walking a dog. Behind the man walking a dog is the rest of the procession, a few hundred men following closely...

A young guy gets paired with an elderly stranger for a round of golf

A young guy gets paired with an elderly stranger for a round of golf. They're on the fifth green, the old guy is lining up a putt, when they notice a funeral procession passing by the course.

The man backs away from the putt, removes his cap, bows his head for a quick prayer, crosses himself...

Playing golf, when a funeral procession goes by

A couple of guys are out playing golf one fine day. One guy is about to take a swing, when a funeral procession turns onto the street next to the golf course. The guy stops in the middle of his swing, takes off his hat, and bows his head until the procession is out of sight.
"Wow!" says the seco...

An Exclusive Golf Course

This golf nut had waited his whole life to play on a very exclusive golf course, and he finally got his chance. He was paired with another guy he didn't know who had also lucked into a round there.

At one point, a funeral procession came down the street. The first man stopped, while he was p...

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