What do you call it when the floor staff at a chicken processing facility take over the business without the owner's permission?
A coup de coop.
A Montana cowboy was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud toward him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how ...
The Robot Family.
It's a big night for XR-573, the patriarch of the robot family. Not only are all three of his sons going to be over for dinner for the first time in years, but all three of them have brand new fiancées! XR-573 and his wife Z7-271 are both very excited to see their children and learn all about their ...
My friend’s house stinks because he lives downwind from a milk processing firm.
Everything smells like dairy air.
I just got a job processing transactions for a global multi-billion dollar company!
I’m so thankful to McDonald’s for this opportunity.
Why is the SBA so slow at processing EIDL loans?
You try working in the dark and see how much you get accomplished.
A man walks into a hospital ward and starts inspecting all of the bed charts.
A doctor notices this and says, "Excuse me sir, but what are you doing?"
The man ignores the doctor and continues, now taking everyone's blood pressure.
"Sir, I'll ask you again", says the doctor, "why are you here and what are you doing?"
Ignoring the doctor again, the man t...
Why did the optimist lose his job at the photographic processing lab?
He couldn't focus on the negatives.
If Dimebag Darrell joined a bank as an employee, he'd break a lot of records cos his processing time is 5 minutes a looooooooooooooooan
I saw a bunch of geese and ducks on the lawn in front of the Tyson processing plant. Initially I thought of how horrible it was that they were there flaunting their freedom to the condemned chickens, but then I thought no.....
it's just fowl behavior.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of new space and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure.
In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all ot...
Building grain processing facilities is a lucrative business
I’m hoping to make a mill by the end of the year.
Two friends were out golfing one morning.
One of them is just getting ready to tee off when he notices a funeral processing passing on the street adjacent to the golf course. He stops mid swing, drops his club and takes off his hat, then begins to say a prayer. Once the procession passes, he puts his hat back on, picks up his club and is...
What did bugs bunny save his word processing as?
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A man worked at a pickle processing plant and came home one day...
A man worked at a pickle processing plant and came home one day and told his wife, "I have this really strong urge to put my penis in the pickle slicer."
His wife was aghast and told him, "Honey, that would be horrible, just resist the temptation."
This goes on for some time, with the ...
Kim jong il takes Kim jong un on a visit to a food processing company.
Il points at a machine and says: “This one, you put a pig into it and sausages will come out on the other side. The power of science is amazing!” To which Un replied: “ Is there a device then, where you put in a sausage, and pig comes out?” •
Kim jong il: YOURMOM
An Inspector goes to a Processing Plant
So an inspector goes to a processing plant. He walks up to the manager and says: ‘I hear you keep your animals in horrible conditions. I’m here to write a report.’
The manager gives a cold smile and says: ‘Where would you like to start?’
‘Let’s start with your pigs,’ says the insp...
TicketMaster was just fined $10 million for hacking into a competitor
At least they were told it would be $10 million, but when they went on the court's website to pay the fine, the site tacked on a bunch of "processing fees" and "venue charges" and the total came out to more like $15 million.
I decided not to invest in that seafood processing plant...
...something smelled fishy.
Remember to NEVER taste-test liquid samples on the job!
Anyways, thank you for listening for my story on how I lost my job at the hydrochloric acid processing plant.