Oscars Jokes - 28 Hilarious Oscars Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Just found out that the Oscars is a big fucking lie all the way along

Those people they invite to their ceremonies are all paid actors

A mosquito was flying around an Oscars party.

First it bothered Emma Watson, then it landed on Natalie Portman. It then flew over to pester Jessica Alba and finally Gal Gadot before it was caught by security. During its interrogation, it confessed "I can't help it. I'm a sucker for a pretty face."

upvote

downvote

report

I was just watching the Oscars...

And a hockey game broke out.

upvote

downvote

report

My Oscars speech

I have to thank my arms for always being at my side, my legs for supporting me and my fingers because i could always count on them.

upvote

downvote

report

Who is hosting next year’s Oscars?

Jerry Springer.

upvote

downvote

report

It's crazy how many people are talking about the Oscars across all my social media feeds

Everything is popping up everywhere, all at once

upvote

downvote

report

The 94th Oscars now known as the...

Oscar De La Hoya's.

upvote

downvote

report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why don't porn movies win Oscars?

Because the plots are full of holes.

Slapping a comedian on stage at the oscars?

Say what you Will, but that’s a bald move.

upvote

downvote

report

I told Leonardo DiCaprio a joke about the Oscars...

He didn't get it.

upvote

downvote

report

Why did Will Smith slap Chris at Oscars instead of punching

Coz Paper beats Rock.

upvote

downvote

report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why aren’t porno movies included in the Oscars?

I mean winning an Oscar pretending to be the Queen of England is one thing, but looking like you’re enjoying two dicks in your ass, now THAT’S acting.

Well, I for one, LOVED the new format of the Oscars.

Will definitely be a HIT!

upvote

downvote

report

People keep saying Will Smith hit rock bottom at the Oscars

But I'm pretty sure he slapped him in the face.

upvote

downvote

report

Why was Spike Lee mad after the Oscars?

Jussie Smollett got the Oscars for writing, producing and directing BlackKlansmen

upvote

downvote

report

Hopefully Will Smith’s mom didn’t watch the Oscars.

He might have to move back in with his auntie and uncle in Bel-Air.

upvote

downvote

report

Didn't see Liam Neeson at the Oscars last night.

Must be on a blacklist

upvote

downvote

report

Oscars experience mistake awarding Best Picture to Moonlight...

Hollywood blames Russian hacking

upvote

downvote

report

What's the difference between Oscar the grouch and a grouch at the Oscars?

Ones green and the other is black

upvote

downvote

report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man went to a gigantic zoo to visit his buddy Oscar [LONG]

Once there, he marveled at all the animals in their different habitats. Still in awe, he then asked one of the employees where he could find Oscar.

"Oscar? I know two Oscars who work here. Are you looking for Oscar Peterson or Oscar Cocks?"

"Oscar Peterson is ...

What's the difference between James Corden and a Sesame Street puppeteer?

The puppeteer has touched more Oscars.

upvote

downvote

report

I am 110% sure that I am FAR from the first person to think of this joke, but I promise I came by it independently. What did Chris Rock have on his face when he left the Oscars?

Will Smith’s Fresh Prints.

upvote

downvote

report

It's ironic that Parasite won.

Because there was no host for the Oscars.

Huh? Huh?
I'll show myself out.

Thank you for the silver star!. My first!

upvote

downvote

report

Oh snap..I missed the Oscars again.

That makes 35 years in a row now.

upvote

downvote

report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If you thought black people were mad about the Oscars...

wait until the nominations come out for the World's Greatest Dad Award.

A Hollywood janitor decided to try his hand at directing

He's billing himself as "the director who swept the Oscars"

upvote

downvote

report

I want to repaint my room a shade of white...

...but I can't decide between "eggshell", "beige", or "2016 Oscars".

upvote

downvote

report

Say what you will...

At an all-time-low rating, Will Smith single-handedly saved the Oscars.

upvote

downvote

report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.