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Oreo Jokes

Oreo’s in Water

You dip your Oreo’s in water…
Because your dad never came back with the milk.

I went to the website for Oreos today

I hit "Accept All Cookies" and got nothing.

Why did the Oreo cookie go to the dentist?

Because he lost his filling.

I went online to order Oreos and the website errored

My VPN was rejecting cookies.

It bothers me that Double Stuf Oreos is spelled with one 'F'...

Why they don't give two 'Fs' is beyond me.

A man had been feeling sick for several days. Finally he decided to try a new doctor who had just moved into town...

After hearing the man's symptoms and listening to his belly with a stethoscope the doctor told him that he had a tapeworm. ''Oh, is that bad? How can I get rid of it?'' asked the man. ''Come in tomorrow and bring a hard boiled egg and a oreo cookie,'' said the doctor. When he saw a puzzled look cros...

I like my oreos like I like my people...

...held under the surface till the bubbles stop.

What do you call a 70's cookie band?

OREO Speedwagon

A recent study concluded that oreos are as addictive as cocaine.

In a more recent study, I found out that cocaine doesn't actually taste better dipped in milk.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Do you have the Lady Gaga Oreos?

Customer: Excuse me, do you have new Lady Gaga Oreos?

Employee: I'm sorry, we only have the Cardi B ones.

Customer: What's that like?

Employee: Soggy. It's a wet-ass cookie.

I searched r/jokes for the Oreo speedwagon joke I heard recently, but couldn’t remember where it came from, I couldn’t find it. Then I remembered…

I heard it from a friend who, works at nabisco who… heard it from a friend who works at a grocery store who… heard it from another.

My next door neighbour is a ice cream man, he went missing and we eventually found him in the back of his van covered in sprinkles, caramel, crushed oreos and chocolate flakes

Apparently he topped himself!

Iv come to the conclusion, I’m the white stuff in a Oreo

In between two hard black things

What’s a cookie’s favorite rock band?

OREO Speedwagon

What do you call the art of folding cookies?

Oreo-gami

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

NSFW A boy and his grandfather are fishing

Grandpa cracks open a beer. The boy asks for a sip. “Can your dick touch your ass?” asks Grandpa.
“Well, no,” says the boy.
“Then no.”
Later, Grandpa lights a cigar. “Can I try?” asks the boy.
“Can your dick touch your ass?”
“No,” says the boy.
“Then no.”
After dinner, th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Oreos are like boobies...

So much better with milk.

I'm looking forward to the day we celebrate that chocolate cookie with white icing in the middle.

Mem-Oreo Day.

Pick up line: Girl are you an oreo?

Cos I wanna open you up and lick all the good stuff inside

Wait for it…

“Spread me apart, lick me with your tongue, grab my sides, and eat my cream.” - The Oreo

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So I've been puting Viagra in my milk.

It doesn't help with the sex, but my Oreos don't go all soft anymore.

As a mcdonald's worker I get a lot of idiots going through drive through

As is common for mcdonalds the ice cream machine was down
a customer came in and asked for a strawberry shake, I told him the ice cream machine was down

he then asked for a fudge Sundae, I again told him the ice cream machine was down

next he asked for a vanilla cone, I told him the...

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Bad Lil' Johnny's Fishing Trip with His Grandpa... [Explicit]

Bad Lil' Johnny headed out on the water with his Grandpa for a day of fishing. After awhile of fishing, Grandpa got thirsty so he pulled out a beer and began to drink. Bad Lil' Johnny became curious never having tasted beer before and asked if he could have a sip of Grandpa's beer. Grandpa replie...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Costume Party

A couple is excited about a costume party they have just been invited to. The husband, who is black, asked his wife to just pick up a costume for him since he’ll be too busy at work to get one himself. She excitedly agrees.

The next day, he comes home and finds a Batman suit waiting for h...

I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me..

We all could use more calm in our lives. By following the simple advice I heard on a Dr. Phil show, I have finally found inner peace.
Dr. Phil proclaimed the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started. So, I looked around my house to see things I started, and hadn't f...

What's Morris Day's favorite version of Android?

Oh-re-Oreo.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My favorite Halloween joke

So a black man and his wife were invited to a halloween costume party. The man being a very busy person when it came to work tells his wife "Look I need you to buy me a costume for the party since I'm busy with work." She agrees and he goes off to work as usual.

He comes home that night and ...

The closest I've ever come to murder is...

Holding Oreos under the milk until the bubbles stop.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a drugstore asking for viagra...

A man walks into a drugstore asking for viagra,

The pharmacist says he has two kinds, one that costs $20 and one that costs $30

The man asks for the one that costs $30, opens the bottle and pops a pill. He pulls out a credit card to pay and the pharmacist says

“Sorry, we don’t...

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A Boy and His Grandfather.

A young boy is visiting his grandfather one day and sees him smoking a large cigar.
The boy asks "Can I have a puff of that cigar, Grandpa?"
In return the blunt grandfather asks "Can your dick touch your ass, son?"
"No sir"
"Then no cigar for you."
The next day, the boy sees his gran...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[NSFW] Granddad and Grandson are out fishing

Granddad and Grandson are out fishing. Granddad reaches into his overall bib pocket and pulls out a pack of cigarettes.
Grandson looks on and says "Granddad, can I have one?"
Granddad taken back by the question fumbles for a response and asks "we'll grandson, umm can you dick touch your ass ho...

My dental hygienist is so hot

I eat a full box of oreos in the waiting room before having her clean my teeth.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman goes to the grocery store

A woman goes to the grocery store. It's a regular Saturday afternoon. At the end of the shopping she goes to the cashier.

She puts following items on the conveyor belt: pepper, cucumber, salami, ham, cheese and Oreos.

The cashier scanns the items and asks: "madam, are you single?".
...

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