Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily, I only sustained super fish oil injuries

I Can't stop watching doomsday films like The End of the World (1916), The War of the Worlds (1953), Strangelove or: How I Learned To Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964), The day the Earth stood still (1951) The Omega Man (1971)

It's like there's no tomorrow.

"Our Lord has many names. The Almighty. The Messiah. The Alpha and the Omega. The Shepard. Howard."

What do you he doesn't go by "Howard"?! Do you not know "The Lord's Prayer":



*Our Father who art in Heaven*

*Howard be thy name*

So I was in the supermarket this morning and I had an accident when all the Omega-3 feel on me

I'm ok, the manager assured me my injuries where Super fish oil.

The caretaker sat pondering a cube he held before him. (Long)

The caretaker sat pondering a cube he held before him. He sat amidst billions upon billions upon billions, which surrounded him. He alone, at the end of time, bore witness to the Great Library, the vast repository of consciousness in Universe.

Before him was a pile of similar cubes. These cub...

Sergei was walking his 2 dogs.

Someone asked their names.
Sergei replied Omega and Rolex.
The person said he has never heard such names for dogs.
Sergei replied that they were Watch dogs.

Red alert

A Soldier Was Given A Three-Day Leave To Attend To His Newly Wedded Wife But On Getting Home, He Realized That His Wife Was In Her Menstrual Period.

So He Decided To Send A Telegram To His Headquarter To Extend His Leave But With His Mother-In-Law And Other Visitors Around, He Decided To Code...

My collection of Swiss watches was stolen in Spain.

Adios Omegas.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Timeline of r/jokes

Primary Beginning: (Small Community) Decent jokes, good laughs.

Secondary Beginning: (Decent Sized Community) Good Jokes, Very Good laughs.

Early Middle Years: (Large Community) Faction of Reposters have begun to show themselves.

Later Middle Years: (Huge Community) Most of the ...

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